


Chameleon

by Draig (ann)



Category: The X-Files
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-09-18
Updated: 2010-09-18
Packaged: 2017-10-11 23:44:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 47,208
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/118462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ann/pseuds/Draig





	Chameleon

**_ Chameleon  _ ** _ By Draig _

__

Krycek knew that if he remained in his hidden position then he was likely to end up dead. He could hear at least two men coming towards him and from their actions he knew that they were making a thorough search of the premises. So, unless he managed to move out of their way, they would surely find him.

Frantically he looked about. He needed to get out. Needed to... he silently crept away, then stopped, as a voice, coming from the direction in which he was moving, attracted his attention. He knew that voice. It was deep and had a slight drawl to it. He felt a smile creep across his features as he recognised FBI Agent Fox Mulder’s honeyed tones. This was followed by a snapped answer from his ever-present partner, Dana Scully.

"Mulder, whoever told you about this place must have been lying... there is nothing here." Her tone was slightly annoyed, and Krycek smiled, ‘another Friday evening ruined Scully’. As if on cue she continued, "I had a date tonight you know."

Krycek barely managed to suppress the urge to laugh out loud. While Mulder was no longer under the influence of the drug that had been slipped into his water, and Krycek no longer feared for his life, he still had a healthy respect for Mulder’s ability to slap him about. Indeed, several of their meetings had been less than amicable. On one occasion the FBI Agent had even tried to shoot him, in the belief that Krycek had murdered his father.

"My source is very reliable Scully, he’s never lied to me before," Mulder shot back, "And I’ve just got a strange feeling about this..." Then he shouted. "Scully... down." There was a loud crashing noise, the sound of bullets impacting against a wall and ricocheting off the metal containers that were scattered about the large warehouse.

Without stopping to think, Krycek moved in the direction from whence the bullets had come. He didn’t even bother to consider what the cost of his actions might be. Nor did he want to look too closely at the raging emotions that were flaring at the realisation that someone was shooting at Mulder.

He too had been given a tip-off about the location, and had come to see what was afoot. He was momentary distracted from his thoughts by the sound of Mulder’s voice as he called out some instructions to his partner.

She replied shortly and more bullets erupted in the direction of their voices. It was all that Krycek needed to pin point the would-be assassins. With a snarl upon his lips he drew out his own weapon and stealthily advanced towards them.

As he peeked out from behind a container he saw two men, each holding a high-powered rifle, hiding in the shallow shadows cutting off all available escape routes, for both himself and the two FBI Agents who were under fire. Glancing at his watch he realised that they could also be in for a long night, no-one knew where he was, and he doubted if Mulder or Scully had told anyone where they were going either. Whoever had ordered the hit was determined that it would be successful, they did not plan to leave anyone in the warehouse alive.

He heard another noise from Mulder’s direction and, after taking a quick look, realised that the Agent had decided to throw caution to the winds and storm the assassins’ position. Swallowing hard, Alex knew that he would have to act now or risk the chance of losing Mulder for good. At times the man was almost limitless in his stupidly, where his own safety was concerned.

Seeing the gunmen prepare to fire, Krycek did the only thing he could. He jumped out from his hiding place, firing at the first gunman who slammed back against the wall behind him before sliding to the ground. He nearly got away with it as well, but as he brought his gun to bear on the second man, a searing, burning pain in his upper chest prevented him from completing the action. His knees buckled under him and he slipped to the ground, the gun falling from his suddenly nerveless fingers.

Krycek lay on the ground gasping, eyes wide as he saw the man swing his rifle to bear on him again, intent on finishing the job. Even as the assassin’s finger tightened on the trigger, his expression changed to one of surprise and shock. Coughing and spitting blood, he slowly tumbled to the ground and lay still.

Alex smiled. The smile faded when Mulder walked cautiously into view. Krycek drew in a tortured breath, he could feel blood welling within his own mouth, and wondered, almost idly, if the bullet had caught a lung, it didn’t feel like it had, but the blood in is mouth was worrying.

"Scully... over here." Mulder was kneeling down beside him, and Alex wondered about the lost few seconds that had occurred, during which Fox had reached him. Slowly he was turned over fully onto his back. "Krycek." The Agent said, and the tone held the tinge of a curse, as Mulder recognised the man who lay before him.

"In the... flesh..." Alex tried to say, but it didn’t come out right, in fact, it was ruined by the cough that spattered blood over Mulder’s coat. But the ex-Agent thought, it was worth it just to see the look of total distress that swept across Mulder’s face as the seriousness of Krycek’s injury became apparent.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Mulder asked, his tone expressing his utter shock and fear, as he frantically tried to see how seriously the other man was injured.

"Was told... be here... tonight... learn something interesting... guess... they’ve decided... that... we’re both... expendable." Krycek gasped. It was Alex’s last coherent thought, and his last feeling was of Mulder gently reaching out a hand to brush his almost non-existent hair away from his brow. For Krycek that one act alone was worth the trauma and pain of being shot.

=-=-=-=-=

Scully ran around a container and pulled up short, before her was a tableau of death. Two men were obviously dead, their body angles and the amount of blood gave credence to that. It was the third downed man who caught and held her attention. Or more to the point, it was seeing Mulder gently wiping the face of the downed man that caught her attention. It took a few seconds to realise that it was Alex Krycek who was lying within Mulder’s arms as her partner attempted to apply pressure to the wound.

She was frozen to the spot at the sight, emotions surging though her, ranging from pure anger against Krycek, to compassion for her partner and his obvious distress. As if on cue he turned pleading eyes upon her as he gasped. "Scully?"

She moved forward automatically in response to his plea and found herself kneeling beside the injured man. "Mulder..." she began, reaching for the prone body even before it registered that she was about to help a man that she hated. With professional ease she began to treat him, saying as she did so. "The mobile phone should work if you get out into the open Mulder." She was making reference to the fact that the phone had not worked earlier when they had been under attack. "We need to get him to a hospital."

"We can’t." Mulder answered his tone distracted, frowning at the phone that he pulled from his coat. Then seeing the look this earned him, he leant forward and insisted, "How long do you think he will live if we take him to a hospital?"

Scully turned wide, shocked eyes upon her partner and hissed back in disbelief.

"And how long do you think he’s going to live with a bullet in his chest?"

"Scully." Mulder was using the pleading eyes again.

"Mulder..." she shot back equally exasperated. Then she lent back and bit her lip. What her partner said was true. If they sent Krycek to hospital it was doubtful that he would live through the night, too many people wanted him dead. She took a deep steadying breath, then ordered. "Keep the pressure on there, and give me the phone." She took the offered item and watched to make sure that Mulder did as she requested. Then she stood, her coat swirling about her. "I’ll be back shortly." Bending down she rearranged Mulder’s hand so that the pressure was better. "Don’t move," she ordered just before disappearing from sight.

Mulder concentrated on holding the makeshift padding the way that Scully had instructed. Suddenly he became aware that Krycek was awake and silently watching him. He forced a smile to his face, it was forced because he was fighting the fear that this man might be dying. He was also struggling to understand why the thought of Krycek dying was upsetting him so much.

"Bad?" Krycek mumbled, gasping as he spoke. Mulder was unable to say if it was a question or a statement, but he decided to answer as if it was a question.

"You’re not going to die." He spoke firmly as if the words alone could keep Alex alive.

"Mulder... says... so," Krycek whispered. He tried to smile, but with blood colouring his teeth, it was more like a grimace of death.

"Don’t try to talk," Mulder insisted, turning his attention back to the blood soaked cloth under his hands.

Lids closed over green eyes, exhaustion written across the face. "And don’t you dare die on me," Mulder finished, again unable, quite, to hide the fear.

A sound behind them made Mulder glance over his shoulder. Krycek groaned at the pain that his action caused. "Sorry," he muttered, glancing back at the injured man.

Scully came back into view. "I’ve made arrangements with a friend of mine... she has a clinic, just outside of town... if we can get Krycek there, he might stand a chance."

"What about?" Mulder nodded towards the other two corpses.

Scully paused before she said, "I contacted Skinner... he’s on his way." Seeing the look this earned her from her partner she continued, "I didn’t mention our, er, unexpected companion... yet."

"He saved my life Scully," Mulder informed her, his tone deadly serious. Then meeting her shocked expression he rushed on, "He purposely stood up and drew their attention away from me, and he killed the blond guy on the left even as the man shot at me. I saw it." He finished, never taking his eyes from those of his partner as he spoke.

Whatever Scully wanted to say to this was held back as she attended to their present problem. Kneeling back down beside the injured man and seeing him awake she spoke. Her tone was slow and loud, as if talking to a child who would not listen. "We’ve got to move you Krycek, so I want to dress your wound... but," she paused, "This going to hurt."

Krycek just lay there looking at her. The expression in his eyes plainly showed that he didn’t know whether to trust her or not. His glance flickered towards Mulder and the expression changed, as Fox slowly, nodded his head. The injured man closed his eyes, it was a sign of acquiescence.

Scully began to remove Krycek’s jacket and shirt, as best she could trying not to jar the injured man too much. She gave orders to Mulder who did exactly as she asked, and both of them studiously ignored the whimpers of pain their actions caused, knowing that it had to be done if they were going to move the man without killing him.

Part way through the operation Krycek moaned louder than before and his eyes slid closed as his body relaxed. Merciful darkness had claimed him. After that it was easier to treat his wound, and soon Alex was being carried out of the warehouse and carefully placed into the back of their car. Mulder climbed in beside the unconscious man to keep him steady during the journey, and to continued to apply pressure in an attempt to prevent further blood loss.

As they drove out of the warehouse district they heard the sound of approaching cars, the sirens echoing around the tall buildings.

=-=-=-=-=

Scully’s friend was waiting for them when they pulled outside the new, modern looking clinic. Light flooded the car-park and she appeared with a wheelchair. Krycek remained totally oblivious to his transferral from the car to the treatment room. Nor did he awaken as he was prepped and prepared for the operation to remove the bullet.

Five hours later he was resting in a clean, crisp bed that was situated in the recovery section of the clinic. Mulder, Scully and Jenny Seymore were seated in the kitchen sipping a rich brew of coffee. Dana’s friend kept casting cautious glances at the handsome man who sat at her table, but refrained from making any comments. She would wait until she got Scully alone to get some straight answers out of her. While she trusted her friend implicitly, it still did not rest easy with her to remove the bullet from the injured man and agree not to inform anyone. But Dana had been insistent on that, and she had finally allowed herself to be persuaded, after Scully had promised to reveal all to her later. Quite a bit later too, if she was any judge. Scully had helped her remove the bullet, and she could tell that both the man and woman seated before her were near to exhaustion.

"I think we could all do with a good night’s sleep," Jenny commented glancing up at the kitchen clock. Noting that it was almost four in the morning she grimaced and knew that she would only have a few hours before she would have to get up. For once she was glad that her husband was out of town on business, it would save a lot of explaining.

"I think one of us ought to remain with Krycek." Mulder said, before standing and lifting his half-full coffee cup, he headed towards the back room where Alex was settled.

"He should sleep the night through." Jenny offered, her expression plainly said that Mulder should also consider doing the same thing, or at least sleeping for what was left of the night.

Mulder stopped, gave her a backwards glance and with a cold smile stated, "I’ll feel a lot safer keeping an eye on him, and sleep isn’t really an option with him so close anyway." With that cryptic remark he left the room.

Before Jenny could comment further, Scully reached out and rested a gentle hand upon her arm, and stopped her. As Jenny looked towards her as Dana said.

"It will be easier just to let him do what he wants."

Jenny lent tiredly back in her chair, and commented dryly, "That sounds like the voice of experience." This earned her a small smile before Scully asked.

"Do you mind if I use your phone, I’d better report in and let them know what’s going on."

Jenny nodded towards the kitchen extension, Once she hard that Dana was connected to someone called Skinner, she stood up, waved that she was just going along the corridor and left the room, so as to give Dana some privacy for her conversation.

She realised as she wandered down the corridor that she was following after Mulder. She paused at the door that led into the room where Krycek lay sleeping, and witnessed the Agent looking at the unconsciousness man with an expression of such wistful longing covering his features that she felt as if she were an intruder in her own clinic...

Mulder gently reached out and brushed back the short hair, it was not a necessary action, but it was one that he needed to do anyway.

Mulder turned slightly to pull a chair closer to the bed, then settled down to watch the sleeping man. If he knew that Jenny was there he gave no indication. After a few more seconds she pushed her hands deep into her pockets and wandered back along the hall towards the kitchen. As she moved she made up her mind that she was going to get the full history of the man from whom she had just removed the bullet, and the Agent who had such obvious feelings for him.

=-=-=-=-=

The remainder of the night passed peacefully for the injured man. Although he did contract a slight fever, it was not serious and Jenny felt that the antibiotic that she had him on was enough to counteract the infection.

Mulder did not move from the man’s side. Although Scully had left the clinic shortly after her phone conversation with her boss, AD Skinner, who had asked for a report in person. At first she had not really been willing to leave her partner behind. But having very quickly realised that Mulder was not going to desert Krycek, she agreed that she would have to be the one doing the report. Also, she acknowledged, if the truth was known, she stood more chance of surviving the interview than Mulder, who would so often butt heads with their boss on smaller issues than this.

As the light broke across the horizon, Mulder became more animated, and on one of Jenny’s visit to the sick room he asked, "How long before can we move him?"

"Move him?" she repeated in some surprise, she had managed an hours sleep, but still felt as if she was walking under water, "well..." she paused and considered her answer. "He lost a fair amount of blood and the wound, while not serious in itself, is in a rather awkward position, and very messy, so moving him could start the bleeding again, and..."

Mulder interrupted her, his tone slightly impatient. "Listen Dr. Seymore, I don’t mean to be brash, and I am very grateful for all that you have done, but we have to get Krycek to a safe house as soon as possible... Now that Scully has made her report, I believe that his life may be in immediate danger, and I’m willing to bet that pretty soon this place will be crawling with people. Frankly, I’d rather not be here when they arrive."

"You think his life might be in danger here?" she asked in some surprise. She had thought that his injury was a result of a shoot out, or some FBI operation gone slightly wrong, and not some ongoing vendetta. She shivered as she remembered that her own patients would be arriving very shortly. Would it be fair to get them involved in this situation? Seeing the look on the Agent’s face she knew the answer before he even opened his mouth. Holding up her hand she forestalled him by offering a compromise, "If you can keep movement and jarring down to the minimum, I can make sure that he doesn’t wake up until you’ve got him settled in a new place. But, you will need to keep a very careful eye on the wound, and make sure that it stays clean." She paused again as she considered the implications of moving the injured man. "And you will need to change the intravenous bags... he needs to be kept hydrated and on these antibiotics for at least another three to four days."

"I can do that." Mulder insisted, eager now to be on his way. "I have some medical training."

From the way he spoke Jenny could not tell if that was the truth or not, but she decided not to argue the point.

"Do you have a er... safe place to take him?" she asked, infected by his urgency and starting to gather the items that he would need.

"Yes, I believe that I have just the place." Mulder didn’t enlarge upon his words and she felt that it was safer for her not to know.

Within an hour, Mulder had been given a crash course on how to treat and clean Krycek’s wound, how to insert an intravenous needle, and change the bags when it became necessary. Then everything he would need was loaded into her husband’s large 4 X 4 truck, which she had insisted that Mulder borrow while her husband was away and as he was not expected back for at least another two weeks, the car would not be missed.

Mulder also knew that he could never thank Jenny enough for the short shopping trip she had run, while he had showered and shaved, before moving Krycek to the truck, it had effectively stocked them up with food, drink and essential items for several days.

The truck that Mulder drove could not have been better suited if he had chosen it for the job himself. It was roomy in the back and allowed for Krycek to lay out flat. They had managed to secure him to one side so that he was not jostled too much by the actual driving, and the IV had been suspended from an improvised hanger, softly hitting the window as the car swayed from side to side. He had also been swaddled in several large blankets and quilts that Jenny had insisted they use, not only to cushion Krycek even further against any bumps Mulder might hit during the drive, but also to keep him warm. At every stop the Agent turned to check the other man, but he was pleased to note that Alex slept, oblivious to his journey. The last injection that Jenny had given him would work until evening at least, according to the young, pretty, doctor.

Soon after he had started the journey his cell phone began to ring, and on answering it he discovered a very annoyed Scully on the other end. She had arrived back at the Clinic to find both Krycek and her partner missing, and Jenny had no idea where they were heading.

"Where are you Mulder?" she asked, it suddenly seemed to the man driving the car that she always appeared to be asking him that question.

"I’m just heading out of the city..." he purposefully kept his answer vague, "To a place I know... it’s safe Scully and when Krycek’s fit enough I’ll bring him in for questioning."

"Mulder, you know he should be in a proper hospital. He needs proper medical attention... Skinner has agreed to protect him, if he will give evidence against his bosses..." Even as she said the words she knew that they would have no sway over her partner so she changed tactics, "All right Mulder... but wait for me... I’ll meet up with you and together we can protect him better."

"No... they might have followed you from the office... and you know that we’ve tried that route with others, they always die... No... this way at least I get to talk to Krycek before those bastards get to him."

"Skinner is not going to like this." Scully stated firmly, her annoyed tone making Mulder wince as she sounded as if she was sitting in the car next to him, he could almost picture her pouting expression.

"I’ll call Skinner when I get to the safe house... now I’ve got to go the traffic is getting busy and I need both hands." He lied, not wanting to continue the conversation with his redheaded partner.

"Mulder... Muld..." he turned off the cell phone before tossing it onto the seat beside him, glancing back he checked to make sure that Krycek was still deeply asleep, satisfied, he concentrated on the driving.

Several hours later, Mulder pulled off the main road, into a dirt track and was soon hidden by the dense cover of trees that came right up to the edge of the pavement at either side of the highway. He slowed his speed down to a slow crawl very conscious that any jarring could start the bleeding again. Luckily, while the road was not very often used the dry weather of late had created a firm surface for the large car to pass along.

After thirty-five minutes of slow driving, Mulder spied the timber cabin in the distance. It sat on the edge of a large lake and at any other time would have been idyllic for a ‘get-away-from-life’ holiday. Glancing back at the injured man his pleasant thoughts faded. Why was he doing this, why was he risking his job and his life to help this person, the man who he was convinced had murdered his father, helped in his partner’s abduction and committed numerous atrocities against both himself and his friends. Yet, even as he pulled the car to a stop and placed it in park, he knew that he just had to save this man, why would become apparent as time went on, at least he hoped it would.

He left Krycek sleeping while he unpacked the rest of the truck. Then he lit a fire in the grate of the large cabin, opening the bedroom door to allow the heat to pass into it while he made up the one, large, bed.

When he had finished, he went back out to the truck and looked at the unconscious man. He now had to move him from the truck to the bed. While Mulder had appeared confident to Dr Seymore about being able to remove and replace the intravenous needle, he was not so sure now that the time had come.

With a slight shake of his head he clambered into the back of car and began to remove the equipment, blankets and quilts, then, as gently as possible, he moved the other man from the truck to the bed, which he had laid open ready for the patient. It was not an easy manoeuvre and he silently cursed Krycek for any weight that he had put on, as he finally managed to swing the man up into his arms, with Krycek’s head resting limply against his shoulder, his uninjured arm looped casually about Mulder’s neck. It was like carrying a rag doll. Staggering a little under the weight Mulder made his way into the cabin.

Several minutes later, Mulder stood back and looked at his handy work. Krycek was now resting in the middle of the bed, the IV firmly replaced, with a new bag which was slowly dripping fluids and antibiotics into Krycek’s system. Mulder looked at the sleeping face and drew in a sharp breath as he realised just how handsome his sworn enemy was. Without conscious thought he reached out and brushed a stray lock of hair back from the fevered forehead. While the double agent still had fairly short hair, it had just grown to that length where it flopped over his forehead giving him the appearance of a wayward waif.

Without thinking, the stroking hand slipped down to carefully cup the handsome face, with a shaking finger, he caressed the chin then ran his thumb over the full lips wondering idly what it would be like to kiss them. He moistened his own lips at the thought, and swallowed hard as his trousers suddenly became too constricted for comfort. With a gasp he realised that this was why he had fought to save Krycek’s life the previous night in the warehouse.

With a snarl of rage directed at himself, he moved quickly away from the bed. He didn’t want to have these feelings for this man. He hated him! He wanted Krycek to rot in hell, to suffer the way he had.

Moving into the main room of the cabin he began to prepare a late lunch for himself, as he fought to suppress his emotions. He couldn’t help feeling that if the double agent ever discovered how Mulder felt about him, then Alex would use the knowledge against him. Mulder was not in any doubt that Krycek was capable of taking his heart and ripping it to shreds, if he thought that it might gain him one moment of power. With that thought in mind he ruthlessly pushed his feelings aside, and moulded his features to reflect only the hatred that he had spent the last few years cultivating for his ex-partner.

=-=-=-=-=

Krycek was thirsty, he desperately wanted a drink, and yet knew that if he opened his eyes to ask for one, he would be refused and then they would know that he was awake. He hated it when they knew that he was awake, because then they hurt him. So it was better to pretend that he was still unconscious, he could live with the thirst, but he knew from experience that he could not live with the pain.

"Come on Krycek... I know that you’re awake." The voice was familiar, but not the voice that he had expected, this alone made him break his own promise as he opened his eyes, just a slit, to see who they had brought in to hurt him.

"Mulder..." he rasped, then coughed, it was a harsh sound. Pain flared thorough his body and he whimpered as it centred about his upper chest, and he gasped for breath as tears filled his eyes, but he fought to keep them from falling, and felt some satisfaction when they didn’t.

"Do you want some water? Juice?" Mulder asked, leaning over and holding a cup within reach.

Krycek licked at desperately dry lips, and watched the other man, waiting for him to hold the cup closer before he snatched it away. The injured man didn’t make any attempt to drink.

Mulder leant back, a frown marring his handsome features, as he asked, "What not thirsty Krycek?"

"Where am I?" Krycek ignored the other’s question as he eyes flickered about the room, it was now his turn to frown. He appeared to be in a wooden cabin of some sort. He continued, "What happened?" He could now tell from the bandaged feeling that his upper body was tightly bound, and his body had the feel of having been injured by a bullet.

"You were shot." Mulder confirmed, "Late last night..." seeing no sign of recognition he went on, "at the warehouse... you saved my life." He added, his tone quieter, almost accusing.

The last brought Krycek’s glance up to capture Mulder’s, it held for several seconds before the injured man retorted, "Two mistakes in one day... how unlucky can a man get?" It was not really a question, but it had the desired effect of causing Mulder to draw back and glare at him as the words stuck home.

"Just drink the damn Juice Krycek... you need the fluid." Mulder lent forward again and this time the drink was gratefully accepted as Krycek fought to keep his body still while the other man positioned the straw within easy reach of his lips.

After he had drunk his fill Krycek sunk back further into the pillow, he was exhausted, the slight effort of drawing on the straw had used up his energy reserves and he slipped into an uneasy sleep.

Mulder stood by the bed for several minutes after his ex-partner had fallen asleep and once more wondered at his reasoning behind protecting this man. Earlier, when he’d called Skinner, he had disobeyed a direct order as his boss insisted that he return Krycek to him for proper medical treatment and protection. Mulder had tried to put his point across, but Skinner had been so angry that he’d shouted down Mulder’s words, in the end the Agent had hung up on him. Twenty minutes later when he called back, Skinner, while still extremely angry, was at least prepared to listen to him.

The talk had not gone well, but at least he had gained himself a few days. Skinner had given him five days to keep Krycek safe and ask him whatever questions he felt needed to be asked. Then he would have to reveal their location and await pick-up. Mulder was not sure if he could do that after five days, but that was in the future and he was prepared to wait until that time before he made his decision.

Now looking at the sleeping man and remembering the conversation he wondered if he had made the right decision. Turning he slowly made his way out of the room. He needed to refuel the fire and bring in some more wood, check the generator for their lighting. It was going to be a long night, and he had not got a lot of rest the night before.

=-=-=-=-=

The next time Krycek awoke he felt better. This time it was like awaking from a deep, heavy sleep and it took him several minutes to realise that he did not have the energy to move, also he saw that there was an IV attached to his arm. He watched it drip for several seconds before he lost interest in it.

He tilted his head and felt a ripple of shock flow thorough his system, when he saw Mulder sleeping soundly in a comfortable chair by the bed. It had been pulled up close enough, so that one of the Agent’s slender hands was able to rest on the edge of the bed in his slumber.

He fought to remember the events that had led up to this strange occurrence, and slowly, like the parting of a thin veil, the events of the warehouse returned. He now remembered that he had been shot, and could vaguely remember Mulder’s concerned face as he had leant over him, desperately trying to stop the flow of blood from his wound. Krycek frowned, he could also recall another place, clean, white.... a woman... a hospital? And yet it wasn’t... and now... now he seemed to be in a wooden cabin... where?

He shifted on the bed, and barely managed to stifle his gasp at the raw pain that raced along his nerve endings. He was not going to be able to escape from this situation for a while, that was clear to him. So, he had to manage, and to do that he had to become what Mulder wanted, until he was able to escape the man. He had a lot of practice at that, and felt a tiny smile cross his lips as he recalled how easily it was to fool this man into believing him... this was followed by a deeper frown as he realised that he was the one fooling himself. He forcibly pushed that thought away and concentrated on the matter at hand, he was a human chameleon. His father had taught him that, if nothing else he thought bitterly, and would act according to his instincts.

With that thought in mind, he purposely twisted his body again and let out a loud groan of agony. It awoke the man sitting beside him and Mulder leant forward, gently rested a hand upon Krycek brow as he spoke, "Don’t try to move..."

"Can’t." Krycek interrupted with a moan, his eyes wide with real pain, "Hurts... too much." He finished, gritting his teeth for effect and closing his eyes tightly for a few seconds, as he rode out the agony that he had encouraged, he needed Mulder to believe that he was sicker then he appeared, hoping that it would give him the edge at a later date.

Mulder witnessed Krycek’s pain, and needing to do something he checked that the IV was still in place with a trembling hand. Then twisting to the bedside cabinet, he opened the bottle of pills that Dr Seymore had given him for just such an occasion and shook two out onto his hand. "Here take these..." he advised, holding them out, "They will dull the pain." Krycek did as he was told gratefully, and allowed Mulder to gently hold his head up while he drunk from the offered cup. Then he turned his best smile, weak though it was, upon the other man, before he sunk back exhausted upon the pillow.

"Thanks," Krycek whispered gratefully, fighting against the need to sleep. He wanted to ask some questions, but seemed unable to form the words. Instead he just lay there, sensing the other man as he quietly moved about the room, then returning to the bed, he fumbled with the sheets and made sure the blanket were covering Alex, keeping him warm. It made Krycek feel safe and secure and he realised with a start of shock that he had not felt that in a long, long time. His reaction must have telegraphed itself to Mulder because the Agent spoke softly to him.

"It’s all right... you’re safe here...you can relax, I’m not going to let anything happen to you."

What really gave Krycek pause for thought was the knowledge he absolutely believed Mulder. He actually felt that the other man would do all in his power to protect him, and it gave him a warm feeling in the pit of this stomach, and with a flare of heat, he realised that he wanted this feeling of security more then anything else.. It also, he acknowledged frightened him more then anything else.

Mulder sat for several minutes after Krycek had fallen back into a pain exhausted sleep, and just watched the double agent. In his mind he was trying to come to terms with the fact that this man, who looked so much like a angelic child while he slept, could be such a cold-hearted killer when he was awake.

Roughly he shook himself and purposely moved from the bedroom to the kitchen. Dawn was just breaking across the sky as he finished making the coffee. He poured some of the strong brew into a mug and moved out of the cabin, heading towards the lake. He watched the dawn activities on the large body of water as the water birds rose to welcome the coming day. The water rippled gently at his feet and he took a deep, fresh breath of air, letting it feed his body and calm his soul.

As he sipped at the coffee he considered his next actions. First he would need to disable to truck. He was under no illusions about Krycek’s character, the man would attempt to escape at the first opportunity, even if he ended up passing out half a mile down the road, he would make the attempt.

Then when Krycek next awoke, Mulder would try to get him to eat something. Dr Seymore had been very firm on the subject, telling him that the sooner the injured man ate the better he would feel. Mulder wanted Krycek up and on his feet, or at least able to hold an intelligent conversation. The Agent was very conscious that he only had five days and he wanted to use the time wisely, for he had so many questions that he wanted to ask the other man.

Suddenly the night of his Father’s death sprang to mind and he let it sweep over him as he recalled the drug-induced anger at his ex-partner. He had wanted to kill him when he’d seen him outside his apartment the following night, had wanted to take the man’s life and would have enjoyed doing it, if Scully had not stopped him.

Without thinking he raised his arm and rubbed at the memory of his own shoulder wound. Had it been so long ago. Slowly his eyes closed and he took another deep breath, pushing his jumbled emotions away as he just accepted the bright new day and the weak sun that beat down upon him.

Lifting the cup he took another deep swallow and tasted the strong brew as it slipped down his throat. He accepted the knowledge that Krycek might not be able, or even willing, to give him the answers he was after, but for some reason, just having the man here, within his grasp made him feel better. It was almost as if they had a connection that had been growing since their first meeting, and Mulder was convinced deep in his heart that Krycek did have some knowledge that would be useful to him.

It was almost like he, Mulder, was the deposit box and Krycek was the key holder. With a sudden snarl the Agent threw the rest of his coffee into the placid waters of the lake as dark thoughts rushed in upon him. Krycek was no hero. He would not become a knight in shining armour. He was a killing rat bastard who had shot Mulder’s own father, and almost certainly, if Cardinal was to be believed, had a hand in the death of Scully’s sister and the sooner he accepted that and treated him as such, the better it would be for all concerned.

The gentle mood of earlier was now gone, Mulder set about making sure that the truck would not be going anywhere without his knowledge. If Krycek wanted to leave this place then he would be doing it on foot.

=-=-=-=-=

Krycek lay awake for several minutes before he allowed his eyes to open. He now felt well rested, the pain of that morning was now only a dull throb that remained tame, as long as he didn’t try to move too much. The IV was still attached and he wisely decided to leave it where it was for the moment.

The door to the bedroom was open and Mulder’s shadow fell across the threshold as he approached, "You’re awake," he said, stating the obvious.

Krycek didn’t answer, just watched the man as he neared the bed. "Are you hungry?" Mulder continued, seemingly not bothered by the lack of an answer.

"Where am I?" Krycek asked, tilting his head away to look at the one window in the room, his bed was too low for him to see out of it, but he could see the blue sky and the tall trees that surrounded the cabin.

"Somewhere safe."

"And what is the populace of this place called ‘somewhere safe’?" Krycek asked sarcastically.

"Two..." Mulder answered with a slight smile, then reached out and gently rested the back of his hand against Krycek’s forehead. The other man twisted his head away, only to gasp in pain this action caused, but he didn’t speak so Mulder continued, "You’re still a bit hot, but the doctor said that’s to be expected for a few days."

"Why have you brought me here?" Krycek asked, turning his dark eyes upon the other man.

Mulder considered the question for a few seconds before he answered, "To keep you safe."

Krycek smiled at that and slowly shook his head, as if Mulder had just said something impossible and the other man was finding it hard to believe. "You don’t have enough men in the whole of the FBI to do that," he answered with conviction, his tone bitter.

"Hence ‘somewhere safe’ with the populace of two." Mulder quipped back. "Now, are you hungry? I have some soup on the stove, the doctor said you should try to eat... to gain your strength back." He offered the latter as an incentive.

Krycek thought for a moment before he slowly agreed, "OK." He made to move up in the bed, but Mulder was there to stop him, then gently, with more caring then the double agent believed possible Mulder helped him to sit up in the bed, stuffing extra pillows behind him to support him. The action still hurt Krycek and he hissed in pain as his body protested the movement.

Mulder stood a few seconds, checking the other man as the pain flared, then seeing that Krycek had control of it, he left the room to return a short time later with a tray of food.

The meal was consumed in total silence. Krycek absolutely refused to allow Mulder to help him eat, so the Agent just resumed his seat from earlier and sipped from his own cup of coffee, watching while the other man slowly fed himself. It was a painfully slow process, but Krycek was determined to manage by himself.

When the meal was finished, Krycek slumped back onto the pillows and waited while Mulder removed the tray to the kitchen and returned with another glass of water.

"What now?" he asked, not even bothering to open his eyes. He felt weak and drained, but not tired enough to sleep.

"Do you feel up to answering some questions?" Mulder asked, returning to his chair.

Krycek shot him a look from the slightly open slit of his eyes as he replied, "If I say no will you leave me alone?"

Mulder smiled at the tone, and answered honestly, "For the moment... yes."

Krycek considered the other man’s words and knew that it would only be a temporary reprieve, and he did want to lure this man into a false sense of security so he slowly, carefully took a breath and asked, "What do you want to know?"

"Do you believe in aliens?"

"What!!!" Krycek demanded as his eyes snapped open and he glared at the other man, this was not a question that he expected to be asked.

Mulder kept his eyes steady and his tone firm as he asked again, "Do you, Alex Krycek, believe in aliens, you know little green men and all that?"

Krycek considered laughing in the other man’s face, but then pushed that particular emotion aside, that would not gain him any ground. So instead he thought about the question seriously and answered honestly, allowing his head to slip back to the pillow tiredly as he nodded before saying. "Yes."

"Why?"

The injured man thought about his response to that one. He considered telling Mulder that he had been sitting next to one the entire flight back from Hong Kong, but he paused, did he really want to throw that into the crucible yet? Once Mulder had that information there would be no end to the questions, so instead he answered, "Because you told me they were out there."

He was rewarded by a sharp intake of breath, followed by a fierce glare form the man sitting beside the bed, as unbeknownst to Krycek, Mulder was already aware that he had been possessed by the oil alien. Instead Mulder lifted an eyebrow and decided to tackle that particular matter later, when Krycek was feeling more communicative. Instead he diverted to another burning question that was rending his soul, and he asked it before he could stop himself. "Did you kill my father?" Mulder gritted out, a snarl now twisting his handsome face.

Krycek smiled bitterly, realising that his reprieve from Mulder’s violence was even shorter than usual, now this was common ground. "No." he answered firmly.

"I don’t believe you." Mulder shot back, raising from the chair to lean threateningly over the injured man.

"Well that’s going to make this a very profitable Q and A session isn’t it... If you’re not going to believe my answers simply because they don’t fit in with what you want...," Krycek shot back, his own anger raising, but he didn’t have the energy to raise up like Mulder had done, so he contented himself with glaring back at the other man.

Without thought Mulder raised his hand, but froze suspended in his action of striking the man. The fact that he was about to hit a badly wounded man rolled over him, and he slowly dropped his hand saying, his voice barely above a whisper, "You were a lying bastard the day I met you, Alex and you’re still a lying bastard." With that he span about and stormed out of the room.

Krycek lay on the bed, unable to move, his muscles frozen from the sudden threat of attack. Slowly reaction set in and he felt his body begin to shake. This caused his injury to flare painfully, but he bit his lip and refused to make a sound. If he did then Mulder would return, and that was something Krycek didn’t want to happen until he had control of his body once more.

Several moments passed before his tortured body started to relax. The tremors faded, until he lay exhausted on the bed. He closed his eyes and tried to push the fear back. Ever since he had been trapped in the silo these attacks had dogged him. They always seemed to strike when he least expected them, and always they left him feeling lost and alone, as if, when the alien had departed, it had removed something from Krycek’s body that he was only just now starting to miss. Taking a shaky breath he bit his lip, drawing blood, as he realised that it had taken his only defence, it had stripped him of his ability to play the chameleon.

Every harsh lesson his father had taught him would do him no good now. Nor would the endless hours spent trapped in the small airless cupboard in the darkened cellar, a punishment that his sire had set because he had been unable to perform some survivalist task that had been set. Those bitter, brutal, days had shaped and formed the young boy, turning him into the man who now lay on the bed. The boy who had taken every lesson his father had beaten and abused into him, had wrapped it about himself like an impenetrable shield that could not be broken. He had become a chameleon, doing and saying whatever he needed to survive. That had been the lesson his father had tried to teach him, in remembrance of his own life before he had managed to flee to America.

Now the shield was gone. No longer could Krycek look with confidence into Mulder’s eyes and feel the lies slip so easily to his lips. Nor could he take the life of another and not realise that once gone it could never be replaced. It almost made him laugh to realise that the alien, in using his body, had made him more human then he’d ever been before it had possessed him. He would have laughed, if only it wasn’t painful.

Without conscious thought he pulled back the covers of the bed, and struggling to sit up he roughly removed the IV needle. Then standing on shaky legs, he searched the room for some clothes, pushing aside the dizziness that assailed him. He had to get out, get away before Mulder returned to ask him more questions.

Like the wounded animal he now was, he needed to get some space, so that he could examine exactly what he had been stolen from him. At the moment he felt like a child touching an open wound, and wincing when he caused himself pain. He did not fully understand it and it terrified him. He needed distance and seclusion to heal, to rebuild those defences that now lay shattered.

=-=-=-=-=

Mulder had stormed out of the cabin and headed for the lakeshore. He could feel his muscles trembling in anger. He had wanted to hit Krycek, it had been almost a palatable emotion and it worried him. He was not, by nature, a violent man, he preferred reason above anger, and yet when Krycek had lied to him so openly, he had wanted to beat the man into speaking the truth.

Yet, maybe being possessed was not something the man wanted to remember. Maybe Krycek had tried to push the memories from his mind... He tried to imagine what it must have been like. Would he want to remember if the roles had been reversed?

He raised a hand and swept his hair back. He took a few deep, steadying, breaths and slowly began to walk along the shore. He did not plan on going far, but he needed to put some space between himself and the other man.

As he walked he began to wonder again if he had done the right thing. Maybe he should just go back to the cabin, call Skinner and have the man pick Krycek up and place him in protective custody. Even if it meant the rat bastard’s death, why should that bother him, after all the man was responsible for his father’s death.

Mulder stopped and leant against a large tree as he looked back out over the lake. Damn it all to hell, then why had he believed Krycek when he had said that he didn’t kill his father. Why had the words held the ring of truth, and why was Mulder so upset to realise that Krycek might not have murdered the one man the Agent thought he loved above all others.

Slowly, he slipped down to the ground and rested his head in his hands, leaning his elbows on his knees. He didn’t want to do this anymore. He didn’t want to be the one who kept looking for the truth. Didn’t want to keep searching for the Holy Grail that was forever out of his reach.

He took a breath and realised that it was more of a sob. Great, was he now going to add tears to his long list of self-indulgent acts? Grimly he set his face and shook his head, trying to shake off his emotions, vowing he would not submit to them. He was stronger than that. So Krycek had lied to him about being possessed by the alien, so what. Krycek always lied, that was the one consistency that he could accept from the man, and surely it was easier to just deflect his words to get to the truth.

For some reason that thought lightened Mulder’s mood and made him feel better, and, while he did not really understand what was going on between Krycek and himself, he suddenly felt better able to handle it. He was willing to admit that he had lost his temper, and that he should not have shouted at the injured man, and he certainly should not have turned to violence.

With that thought in mind he rose, and was surprised to note that more time had passed than he realised. The sun was now starting to dip towards the horizon and the chill of the evening was closing in. Glancing at his watch he saw that he had left the cabin over an hour before.

Turning he swiftly made his way back to the cabin. He would prepare another meal and ensure that Krycek ate it, then he would give him a couple of the painkillers that Dr Seymore had given him, the drug was powerful and should send Krycek to sleep, then Mulder could change the IV bag and get some rest himself. Tomorrow... tomorrow he would question Alex again, and this time he would not lose his temper. This time he would treat it as some kind of word-game, that he had to play to trap Krycek into revealing what he knew.

As he neared the cabin, he knew with a certainty that something was wrong. Breaking into a run he burst into the bedroom, only to stand frozen in shock as he realised that Krycek was no longer in the bed. The covers were tossed back, the IV needle hanging useless by its side.

Spinning about Mulder rushed back out the door. The injured man could not have gone far. He paused briefly by the truck and noted that it had indeed been broken into to, the door was slightly open. Mulder realised that he must have noted it unconsciously as he return to the cabin, and it was that fact which had alerted him that all was not well.

He stood still and listened. He could hear a noise in the distance, he glanced briefly at the roadway that led away from the cabin, but dismissed it almost immediately, Krycek was not a fool, and would not take the easier path. Standing by the truck door he glanced down and felt a shiver to fear course thought him when he saw the blood, it was only a drop, but it stood out clearly on the pale dirt. Looking about he spied another drop.

Before he could register what he was doing he was off, chasing after the escaped man. As he moved he felt rage again take control. How had Krycek found the energy to move from the bed, let alone escape. He reasoned that the injured man was not as hurt as he had led him to believe. He had been lying to him again.

=-=-=-=-=

Krycek slipped and hit the ground hard. He stayed where he had fallen, the world spinning dizzily about him. He felt sick, and wanted to do nothing more than die where he had dropped. His energy was spent, he could not continue.

It had taken him ages to clamber into the clothes that he had found, and he had wasted far too much time trying to get the truck started. He had no idea where he was, how far away from civilisation they were, or what he was going to do if he should reach it.

He gasped in much needed air and cried out as his wound protested such rough treatment, he knew that he was bleeding again, had felt the hot, sticky substance slide down the inside of the sweatshirt he had found. He felt the tears of pain slip from under his tightly closed eyelids, and wanted to scream out his frustration. He had finally became what he’d always feared, a man who could no longer control his own fate, his temper, or his emotions, he was no different from his own father.

As he lay there waiting for the world to stop spinning, he began to catalogue his feelings, trying to drag the shattered remains of the torn shield about him. He knew that his main problem was his feelings for Mulder. The man was supposed to be his enemy, but from the very start he had not been able to fulfil his job properly. Every moment he had spent in the other man’s company had dragged him deeper and deeper into his clutches, he had hung upon his every word, had delighted in watching him speak as the lips moved. Krycek had imaged what those lips could do over his body. Ever since their first meeting he had awoken with Mulder’s name on his lips, his bed soaked with the results his erotic dreams.

If nothing else, the alien possession had shown him that he could no longer run from his love for the other man, maybe it was the knowledge that he was about to die, or that he was left in the silo after spewing up the alien. He could not actually place his finger on the moment when he’d realised that he loved Mulder. There was no blinding flash of light, no heavenly choir to sing in the event. Just the feeling over the months since their first meeting that he didn’t want Mulder hurt, that his safety had became paramount to him. So much so, that Alex had taken to standing in sheltered doorways, in the pouring rain just to capture a glimpse of him. Culminating into Krycek taking a bullet for Mulder. The realisation that he loved Mulder came crashing down upon him and he suddenly knew that he wanted to die, really, really, wanted to die. For the first time since he had lost control of his life, he no longer wanted to live. It was not the alien who had stolen his ability to be a chameleon, it had been Mulder’s first smile, his first pout, his first... glance. Krycek’s father had never been able to train him against it, because Krycek’s father had never **felt**.

Suddenly Mulder was upon him, breaking into his line of vision and bearing down on him. The Agent stumbled to a stop and swooped down to grab Krycek by the jacket he was wearing and dragged him roughly to his feet. He gave him a hard shake, which caused another whimper of pain to leak out from the pale clenched lips.

"I ought to shoot you where you stand," Mulder snarled as he pressed the gun he had not been aware he had drawn to the soft flesh under Krycek’s jaw. It had pushed in hard and would leave a nasty bruise.

"Do it." Krycek spat, his eyes wide with his own terror, but also gleaming with a bitter hope that Mulder would kill him and end his suffering. To love Mulder and know that the man hated him in return, was too much pain for one man to bear and survive. "Don’t fucking talk about it... do it... pull the trigger," he gasped, it was an acrid tone that twisted into sneering as he continued harshly, "I did it to your father."

Mulder lost all reason at those words and slammed Krycek back hard against the tree, the injured man immediately tumbled into unconsciousness, his sudden weight dragging him from Mulder’s one handed grasp.

Mulder made to follow him down, to continue the attack, then reason clicked back into place and he ended up leaning over the unconsciousness man, his arms outstretched, one hand splayed as he rested against the trunk of the tree gasping in air, fighting to regain control of his emotions.

Several minutes passed before he slowly put his gun away and knelt down to inspect Krycek. Mulder was still breathing heavily and wiped at the sweat that was slowly dripping down his face. He could not believe the range of emotions the man under his hands caused him to feel. They swept from a deep boiling anger, to a desperate need to just wrap the other man in his arms and never let him go, to always keep him safe.

He staggered back and landed on his butt as the realisation stuck him. He felt his heartbeat pick up to an alarming rate and wondered if he was going to have a heart attack. He loved Alex Krycek. When had it happened? Why? He remembered someone once telling him that the line between love and hate was very thin, but this... this was insane. This man had lied, cheated, and murdered, and yet, even now looking at him, bloodied, dirty, lying on the ground bedraggled, lost and defenceless, Mulder could feel the curling snake of desire as it wrapped itself about his stomach, and edged lower.

Krycek groaned and slowly blinked, the trees above him were deflecting the light and giving the impression of timelessness. He was lying awkwardly on the ground with Mulder sitting a short distance away, hands resting spread out behind him as he sat, with an expression of total stupefaction on his face. After several moments of just looking at each other, Mulder finally spoke, saying in an almost accusatory tone, "You didn’t kill my father." Raising to his knees he slowly crawled nearer to the injured man.

"I hate... you... Mulder," Krycek gasped out, his lips trembling as he spoke. His eyes were bright, and he looked desperately as if he wanted his words to be true, but his voice did not carry conviction.

Mulder lips formed into a predatory smile. Slowly he shook his head in denial of Alex’s words, as he crawled nearer, and nearer, until he was finally kneeing before Krycek. Then, with gentle hands he manoeuvred him about until Alex was held tightly in his arms. The injured man hissed in pain as he was moved, only attempting to struggle once, but it instantly became clear that his ex-partner was not going to be prevented from doing what he wanted, so Alex became passive, allowing Mulder to move him. Once settled in Mulder’s embrace he sank into it as if he had been designed to fit there. Resting his head comfortably upon the other’s shoulder Krycek finally asked. "Why didn’t... why didn’t you kill me?" There was genuine curiosity in the tone.

"I can’t," Mulder simply said. Holding the other man carefully as he one-handedly tried to look at the bleeding wound. He was relieved to find that while it had bled, leaving a minute trail for him to follow, it had not been as serious as he thought. "We have to get you back to the cabin... I need to clean that up."

"I hate... you," Krycek repeated, but it sounded weak even to his own ears.

Mulder just paused, and looking down at Alex, he smiled tenderly, it lighted his eyes as he replied, "I know... I... hate... you... too." As he spoke he manoeuvred his lips closer, and closer, to those of the man he held, until the final words were spoken directly into the other’s mouth.

The kiss was gentle, sweet and oh so loving. Mulder’s lips seeking, asking permission for entry, the request was answered as Krycek’s mouth opened under his, and his tongue was allowed to probe into the sweet, dark recesses.

Both men were gasping when they parted. The fire in Mulder’s eyes sent a bolt of desire through Krycek’s body, and he licked at his kiss swollen lips, raising his mouth again, asking for and offering more. Mulder was swift to oblige and another tender kissed ensued.

This one was longer, and it only ended because Krycek was unable to suppress the slight whimper of pain that the crushing embrace tore from his occupied lips. Mulder immediately drew back, raising a gentle hand to erase the pain from the other’s brow as he whispered, "I love... the way you... hate me... Alex." Seeing the slight smile that this sally drew from Krycek, he would have continued, but suddenly noted with a frown the paleness of his companion, and the shaking in the other’s body that was not entirely due to passion. He made up his mind and said instead, "Let’s... continue this... back at... the cabin."

Without further words, Krycek allowed Mulder to help him up, and to take most of his weight as they staggered back to the building. The light was fading fast now and by the time they reached the porch night was upon them.

After getting Krycek settled back in the bed, Mulder gave him a couple of pain killers, then spent the next few minutes preparing the items he would need to tend to the other man’s wounds. By the time he was ready, Krycek was almost unconscious from the combination of tablets, and the exhaustion that had claimed his body, so cleaning and re-bandaging the wound was not as difficult as Mulder had anticipated. He finished by reattaching the IV needle and replacing the old bag with the last one that the doctor had given him. Once that was done he stood back to check his handiwork.

Krycek was still too pale for his liking, and he could see that Alex was now sporting a light fever, no doubt due to his exertions, but there was little that Mulder could do about it, rest was the best medicine. Moving about Mulder locked up the cabin for the night, banking the fire and dousing the lights in the bedroom, keeping the one in the main room alight, so that it threw a shadow of light into the bedroom, should Alex awake. Although Mulder was pretty certain that Krycek would not be awaking before dawn, the exhaustion and drugs would see to that.

Mulder’s emotions were still in turmoil from the kisses, and while he felt extremely tired, he also knew that he was not going to be able to sleep for a while. So he brewed some fresh coffee, and when it was ready, took a cup outside to stand by the lapping water of the lake, hoping that the clam of the night would help settle him. He spent a quiet hour just looking at the lake and wondering if he was really doing the right thing, if he could trust his emotions. His mind raced about, spinning from one memory to another, all of them centred on the man who lay sleeping in the cabin. They ranged from their first meeting, when he had glanced up and saw the smiling features and eager hand of Special Agent Krycek as he explained what he was doing standing by Mulder’s desk, to their last.

He swallowed hard as he recalled their penultimate meeting, standing outside his own apartment block, holding a gun on Krycek. He’d had every intention of shooting the man, and would have if Scully had not intervened, and shot him instead. When Mulder had regained his senses he had been grateful to her for her actions, but it had taken him a while to realise exactly why he was so grateful. Finally admitting that his thoughts were not getting him anywhere, he poured the dregs of his cold coffee onto the ground and made his way slowly back to the cabin.

Returning to the bedroom he noticed that the IV bag was now empty. Very carefully, so as not to wake the deeply sleeping man, he removed the needle and the equipment. Krycek never stirred, and when Mulder returned to the bedroom, he considered where he was going to rest. As he looked about the room, his eyes kept coming to rest upon his companion.

Finally with a shrug, he removed his clothes down to his underwear and climbed in beside the deeply sleeping man, carefully moving about he manoeuvred Krycek, until the other man was resting warmly within his embrace.

Mulder soon fell asleep, almost as exhausted as the man sleeping beside him. Neither of them awoke during the night, and it was the sounds of the birds outside that pulled them both from their slumber.

Krycek had not moved much in his sleep, even though the IV had been removed the night before, but Mulder had snuggled about and now lay sprawled partly across the other man. His head was resting comfortably on the uninjured shoulder and his arm was wrapped tightly about his companion’s waist. It was comfortable and it felt right.

Alex could feel Mulder’s body as it lay curved against him, the head no weight at all against his heated flesh. For some reason it felt right to have his ex-partner there laying beside him. As he contemplated this thought he remembered that Mulder believed that he had killed his father. Alex felt a sad smile slip across his face as he remembered the death of that man. Another memory stole up upon him, it was of the last time he had seen his own father. He swallowed hard and wished that the pain was not so intense, but at least he was honest enough to admit that not all the pain he felt was caused by the wound. His ragged breathing must have alerted the body resting on him, as he slowly felt Mulder begin to awake. Knowing what Mulder wanted, Krycek decided to give him the details he craved. But he also determined that he would give them to him on his own terms, and do to that he would have to start at the beginning, and telling him about his father seemed as good a place as any to begin.

Mulder awoke with a start, blinking owlishly he noted his position, and when he would have moved, thinking his weight too heavy for Krycek the other man prevented him by gently squeezing the arm, that he had somehow sneaked about Mulder’s body during the night. As he did so he spoke, his words keeping the other man firmly in place.

Krycek’s voice was husky, tinged with a raw pain that caught at Mulder and held him silent, as Krycek began, "My father was a bastard Fox.... You know the type... a class A bastard who thought that to bring up a good son, you’ve got to beat it into him... I know that he honestly thought that he was doing what was best for me... but," Alex paused, feeling that he was not explaining himself very well, He took another steadying breath and began again, not aware that he was attempting to justify his father’s actions towards him. Mulder realised from Krycek’s tone that while Alex’s father might have been a bastard, he was all that his son had, and, in his own way, Krycek had still loved him. "He came from the old country... Russia... he’d been persecuted most of his life, saw his parents killed during the war... Always hated the damn cold, couldn’t wait to get out...," he paused, remembering the nightmarish tales his father used to recount at the dinner table before he added, sounding almost disappointed as he confessed, "I don’t know what really made him tick, maybe it was because of his own wretched childhood, that he felt he needed to make mine a living hell to be a good father... maybe it was the only way he knew how to act... whatever his reasons, I grew to hate him before I was six." A frown crossing his handsome face as he recalled one incident in particular, "I can remember when I was about eight or nine, he suddenly decided one morning, during breakfast.... that I was old enough to be considered a man, and that meant that I was man enough to learn how to fight, and you know... he expected me to fight like a man... to fight him... and if not win, to at least put up some resistance." He let out a bitter laugh as the picture cleared, and he recalled the pain from the attack. The intense beating that had been the result of losing that fight. "If I failed to block a blow, or to dismantle a weapon in the dark, he would shut me away for hours in a small cupboard that he had made in the basement, it was so tight... so small... it.... it allowed no light." His voice caught as he continued to try to justify his father’s cruel actions. "I don’t know, maybe he honestly thought that he was preparing me for life, making me strong, so that if I ever had to face what he faced then I would be ready... but it didn’t work out quite like that..." he gave a sad little laugh. "It might have helped make me strong, but it mainly only made me angry, and bitter. So much so, that I only wanted to get away from him. God I hated him... hated him so much... back then..." he swallowed convulsively as he finished.

"Why... why if I hated him so much do I wake up wishing that I could have said goodbye?" He whispered after several seconds of silence. The pain was raw, the emotions intense.

Krycek closed his eyes, allowing the bitter pain to flow over him, a single tear of regret threatened to fall as he recalled the rage that he had unleashed on his father as he had left his childhood home for the last time. His next and final meeting with his father had been when he had stood, looking down upon the frozen remains of his waxed glacial face, as the man lay upon a mortuary slab in the small local police station. Alex, as his only living relative, had been called upon to identify the body. Not an easy task when the back and side of the head was missing. But Krycek’s only thought at that time had been to critically wonder which of his guns his father had stuck in his mouth. He had finally decided on the old navy colt, it was large enough to cause the amount of damage he saw, but small enough to slip easily into his father’s mouth. Now in Mulder’s arms he finally felt strong enough to face the demon that had hunted him since his childhood, the single tear turned into an unexpected flood of regret, for the man he had never truly understood, but whom he had called father.

Mulder said nothing, he just lay there, letting the light, sweeping movements of his hand over the slightly shivering body reassure the other man that he was still there, still prepared to listen to whatever else Krycek felt he needed to say. After several minutes, the tortured ex-agent managed to get his emotions under enough control to continue, his tone still wavered, but he was determined to finish.

"One thing he did insist on, and that was my education." Wiping at his tear-streaked face with the edge of the sheet, Krycek let out a small, embarrassed, laugh, as he continued, "Man was he insistent about that. One time... he beat me so bad that I had to stay off school... so no-one would know... that was the last time he did that... from then on he just... just shut me in that damn hole in the cellar." Krycek stopped, suddenly unable to go on, overwhelmed by the memory as the impact of his childhood caught up with him.

"Krycek" Mulder finally said, moving backwards to lean up and look in the other man’s face. "You don’t have to..."

But Krycek interrupted roughly him saying, "Yes... yes I do. You wanted to know the truth about me, well I’m telling you.. but to understand what happened later, you need to know about this..."

"Are you sure?" There was only compassion and sorrow in Mulder’s voice, and Alex could tell that he was sincere. The other man didn’t want to cause him any more pain, and for that Krycek felt his feelings for Mulder swell again, he felt it light up his tear stained eyes and needing to draw back, he took a steadying breath and continued with his monologue.

"You know... when I got accepted for the FBI... I was..." his voice held the wonder he had felt at that moment and Mulder knew from his own experiences that no words could describe the emotions that one felt at such a time, but Krycek tried. "I was so high... I could have flown to Quantico without the aid of a plane... I could not believe it when they accepted me... I was just... blown away. This was what I wanted. Had wanted all my life." He paused again as the darker side of his life came to the fore, and he continued bitterly. "I should have realised then... that it was too good to be true... ‘cause I’d only been there a few months before I met...or should I say that it was arranged for me to met the person you refer to as Cancerman..." He felt Mulder stiffen at the name, and tightened his one armed grip on the other man, to let him know that he understood, "At first he just showed up and looked us over... checking out the new recruits... Word went round that he was starting a new task force, that he was looking for keen young people to be in it... man," he let out a embittered bark of laughter, "I fell for that hook, line and sinker." He paused again as he remembered the way he had hung on every word of advice the cigarette-smoking bastard had issued. How he had felt privileged when it became apparent that he was being singled out from the others. "It was near the end of my training and I was eager to see what assignment I would get, you know what that’s like... Anyway, he was there one day... waiting for me when I came back from a run... He said that I had what he was looking for..." He let out another bark of laughter but this one was edged with hysteria, as emotions that he had kept long buried rushed to the surface, too quickly for him to fully control them. He began to pant slightly, fighting the tentacles of a headache that was starting to grow to monstrous portions, and his strong reaction to what he now saw as the darkest period of his life, even worse then seeing his father’s shattered skull on that mortuary slab. "He was good Fox... he was really good... he wove his lies and played me like a simpleton, he used my own patriotism against me." He stopped, gasping out a groan in raw pain as the headache flared and ripped across his skull. He felt a tide of nausea sweep over him and swallowed hard, several times, trying to prevent himself from throwing up.

"Alex?" Mulder asked, suddenly concerned by the leaching of colour from the other’s face. "What is it?" Before Krycek could voice an answer, Mulder felt himself thrown backwards as Alex thrust himself forward and was violently sick over the edge of the bed. His body heaved and shook for several minutes until he lay slumped, exhausted, over the bed, uncaring of his position or the smell that was rising from the dirty wooden floor.

"I... hate... this..." Krycek gulped out as he fought to get his breathing back under control, tears again just beneath the surface, as his voice quivered. "I hate... what my father did to me, what Cancerman made me do... the lies he told, but more than that... I hate the fact that I believed him...." Agony of both the body and soul tore through him and he wanted nothing more than to slip into unconsciousness, he didn’t want to hurt anymore, didn’t want to know that this was his life and there was no way, other than death, to escape from it.

After recovering from the shock of being tossed aside, Mulder had scrambled across the bed, and now lay pressed up close beside Alex, careful not to jar his injured side further, his hand gently rubbing across the still shivering back, offering what reassurance his mumbled words and touch could. As the injured man slowly got his breathing under control, Mulder solicitously coaxed him backwards until he was lying back upon the pillows once more. Seeing the way Krycek was shivering, and suspecting that he was slipping into emotional shock, Mulder pulled the blankets up tighter about him, then moving swiftly he got up and fetched a wet cloth and some water. After wiping the sweating face and allowing Krycek to take some sips of the cool water, along with a couple of the powerful pain killers, he waited until Alex had slipped into an uneasy sleep, before he set about cleaning up the mess. Luckily the injured man had thrown up on the large mat that was beside the bed, so the Agent carefully lifted it up and carried it out of the cabin. After taking it a short distance he tossed it upon the ground and turned the hose on it. Once the mess and smell was gone, he hung it over a branch and left it to dry, then he turned and hurried back into the cabin.

Once back in the bedroom he checked on Krycek. His patient was still sleeping, a troubled frown playing about his handsome features. Gently resting his hand upon the other’s brow Mulder frowned at the heat he found there. He knew that Krycek’s actions the night before had assisted in a resurgence of his fever, but had hoped that a night’s sleep would help bring it down again. However, the exertions of the morning had resulted in raising it another few notches. Mulder opened the one window in the bedroom and the cabin door to allow for a cross breeze, to clear the smell from the room, it was still early morning and the heat of the sun was slowly warming the wood of the building. After checking the sleeping man once more, and ensuring that he was warm enough, Mulder left the bedroom, leaving the door slightly ajar he pulled out his mobile phone and placed his daily call to Scully.

She sounded both happy and annoyed to hear from him. "What’s going on Mulder?" she demanded. "Skinner said that you’ve got a few days grace... what was he talking about and what’s happening with Krycek?"

Mulder threw another glance towards the bedroom before he moved away and spoke. "Krycek is still recovering from his injury, but he’s doing" he paused while he considered his words and finally finished, "better... he’s still a little bit feverish..."

"Mulder that wasn’t what I was asking." Scully snapped, her temper frayed by her worry. "Has he told you anything yet?"

Mulder paused again, that was the million-dollar question, and the only reason why Skinner had given him the five days was to pump Krycek for any information that he had. Licking at dry lips and suddenly feeling very uncomfortable with what he was about to say he offered, "We have been, er... talking... He er... explained why he was at the warehouse," he hurried on feeling the animosity coming from the other end of the phone. "Krycek was told that I would be there and that my... our lives might be in danger... from one of his informants..." he paused again, before adding, his tone trying to ease his partners concern, "He was there to warn me, but it looks like we were both set up." His words were met with a long silence from the other end of the phone, before Scully asked, this time while her words were precise and clear, they were not so harsh or damning as before.

"Has he given you any information that you can use against Cancerman and the Consortium?"

"Not exactly, he’s still weak..." Mulder confessed, reaching up and running a hand through his hair as he heard her exhale, "But we have been talking about his childhood, mainly his father, and how Cancerman first contacted him."

"His childhood..." Scully commented dryly. "Not exactly grand jury material Mulder."

"Look." Mulder snapped, his own temper fraying as he felt the deep bite of betrayal in his stomach, he pushed the feeling away and drawing a deep breath he continued in a more reasonable tone. "He’s injured and in pain, this isn’t easy for him... he’s been through a hell of a lot and... and... at least he’s talking to me." He stopped not sure how to continue. How much of what Krycek had told him, could he pass on to Scully, then realising that she would probably not understand, he reverted to go old fashion anger and finished harshly, "I’m trying to gain his trust, and having you breathing down my neck isn’t going to help... Please, see if you can get Skinner to allow me some more time."

"More time?" Scully repeated her own anger flaring, but Mulder could hear her regaining control of it as she continued, trying, as always to be the voice of reason, "Mulder... Skinner is already sharpening up the knife to skin you alive.. and he’s not too happy with the five day agreement... getting more time out of him is going to take a miracle."

"Well the sooner you get working on it, the sooner the red sea of FBI bureaucracy might part.... Look ...I’ve got to go... I’ll contact you later this afternoon, I’ll try to give you a better report then... once I’ve had time to think, time to assimilate what I’ve been told so far." With that he snapped the phone closed and switched it off, pretending not to hear Scully as she demand that he listen. He chewed on his lip and closed his eyes, he felt as if the world was suddenly closing in on him. He desperately wanted to shield Krycek, unwilling to explain the emotions that he was feeling for the other man, idly he wondered how long he would be able to fool his partner and Skinner before they became aware that he was lying to them.

Unbeknownst to Mulder, Krycek had awoken as he had left the bedroom, and had lain listening through the partially open door as Mulder had placed the call. He was surprised at how hurt he felt that Mulder was telling Scully about their conversation. That Mulder would pass on any information that he gained was not a surprise. But he had thought that what passed between them would be discussed before Mulder passed it on, and had hoped for some foolish reason, that his darkest memories of his childhood would be kept between the two of them.

Mulder opened the bedroom door and froze upon the threshold as he realised that Krycek was awake and, from the hurt expression on his features, that he had heard some of the telephone conversation. "I’m sorry... I didn’t mean..." He began, but Krycek interrupted him, saying, his tone struggling to remain neutral.

"Hey... it’s what... you have to do." He glanced away from the man still standing in the doorway as he continued, "After all I am a suspect to a number of crimes and you are the Agent."

Mulder felt a flash of exasperation and strolled angrily across the room. On reaching Krycek, he grabbed the other man’s face and with surprising gentleness he pulled it up, so that the other’s eyes met his. "You are not just a suspect, you are a witness... and we are in this together...." His anger departed as suddenly as it had arrived, and he slumped down upon the edge of the bed. "I know what you told me this morning was personal... and I should have checked with you first... before I called Scully, but... you were asleep, and I didn’t want her to worry." It was a lame excuse, but it was the truth, and Krycek was able to recognise it for what it was.

Alex reached out with his good hand, and gently ran his fingers down Mulder’s cheek, causing the other man to look up at him, he smiled and offered weakly, but warmly, "In this together huh... bet that’s really going to freak Scully and Skinner."

Mulder tilted his head slightly and kissed the tips of the fingers lightly before admitting, "Not half as much as they are going to be freaked when I tell them about us."

"Is there an US, Mulder?" Krycek asked, his tone intense and uncertain at the same time. After all, they had only exchanged a few kisses, admittedly they had been soul searing, and left them both panting and wanting more, but Alex didn’t really understand Mulder’s feelings for him. He knew what his were, could feel it by the kick in the gut reaction he now got every time he saw Fox, but Alex had identified and learned to live with his love for Mulder over several years, for Fox the epiphany had only appeared to happen yesterday.

Mulder looked away again, closing his eyes as he did so. "Everything that I know about you, what you’ve done, tells me to hate you, not trust you... to put you away in the darkest cell I can find and toss the key into the deepest river... and yet..." he stopped, his face twisting as he confessed his feelings.

"And yet?" Krycek questioned, knowing that he deserved whatever Mulder felt about him, deserved it and more, and yet, yet he still hoped that what he felt for the Agent was returned.

Mulder looked back at Krycek noting the pale face, the tortured eyes and the twisted lip that was being bitten by the perfect teeth. Mulder was unable to prevent a smile slip across his features as he lent forward. Planting a gentle, chaste, kiss upon the worrying lips, he finished, "And yet just looking at you takes my breath away and robs me of my sanity."

Krycek looked down, an embarrassed and relieved smile now playing about his own lips as he repeated, "Robs you of your sanity huh? That would account for the fact that I can look like shit, smell even worse, desperately need a shave and a wash... Hey maybe that’s why I take your breath away."

"Did I mention that I also consider you a very perverted son of a bitch Krycek." Mulder mock snarled, pulling carefully away from the other man, knowing that Krycek was only trying to put the conversation back on to a steady base, and after the emotional turmoil that he had suffered that morning, Mulder could not really blame him.

Krycek reached out and grabbed Mulder’s arm when he would have risen, "I’m also very sick and unable to bath myself... now who could I get to help me with that little chore?" His voice had taken on a sultry tone, and it resonated right through Mulder’s body as, in response, a sudden fire licked along his backbone right down to his manhood, which leapt at the thought of having Krycek’s body under his hands.

Mulder swallowed hard, his throat suddenly very dry. "There is only a shower... but you’re still... I mean... I’m not sure it’s a good idea after all that’s happened..." Mulder suddenly realised that he was babbling so he finished weakly, "You still have a slight fever Alex... I’m not sure it’s a good idea."

Krycek looked concerned as he continued with the game, the fire of desire lighting his own eyes in anticipation, "Well, I know that I’m still too weak to stand by myself so I guess you’d better accompany me, and a wash would definitely help bring my fever down." It was not quite a question, but there was a hint of it in the air. "Or not." He finished with a quick swipe of his tongue over his lips.

Mulder didn’t answer right away and Krycek began to get worried again, until Mulder cautioned, "Krycek I’m serious here... you’ve still got a slight fever and I don’t want you to overexert yourself."

"Mulder, I feel fine, exhausted, but fine and anyway, I was planning on you doing all the hard work, I was just going to stand there and enjoy it."

"What about your wound..." Mulder began, but Krycek reached out and rested two fingers over his lips replying.

"You can give me a sponge bath so the bandage won’t get wet."

Finally Mulder asked the question that he really wanted to ask, "Are you sure?"

Krycek gave Mulder a long steadying look before he spoke, his words quiet but firm, his decision to tell the truth made at the expression of hope that flared in Mulder’s own eyes, "I need this Fox... why I don’t fully understand... I need to tell you that I think that I love you... and these few days might be the only days we get together... so please, let’s not waste them..."

Mulder accepted the honestly of the words for what they were, and when he replied, his own voice was just as determined as he latched onto the words that caused him the most fear, "I’m not going to let anything happen to you Alex... I’ve lost too many people that I... love... but no more, I will never let anything happen to you... together, if we start this, there is no end... not until we finish it together."

Krycek closed his eyes at the sudden pain Mulder’s words caused. He felt like moaning at the agony that flared across his body. Instead he opened his eyes again, and forcing a smile to his lips, he said very quietly, "Mulder... don’t make a promise you can’t keep...." He used his fingers to hush the other man again, when he would have spoken. "I know what I am... what I’ve done... I’m not proud of it, but neither of us are fools, nor do we live in a dream world... Skinner is going to want his pound of flesh, Scully will want to know the reason why her sister had to die, and Cancerman will do his damnedest to make sure that I don’t live long enough to testify against anyone. So please... just give me these few days... it will be enough... and it’s more than I expected, give them to me, and I will accept whatever else happens."

"Alex." Mulder began, his voice torn with fear, but Krycek drew back, anger now reflected in his features.

"For God’s sake Mulder, grow up, this is the real world... a week ago you hated my guts... Hell, yesterday you couldn’t stand the sight of me, even now you still believe that I killed your father, and yet here you sit, professing your love for me and wanting to screw me into next week and the rest of our lives." Krycek stopped, shocked at his own words, he threw Mulder a concerned look as the other man moved.

Mulder leapt up, unable to take the words Krycek was throwing at him, mainly because he knew they had a ring of truth to them. It was only after he had seen Krycek wounded, and almost dying, in the warehouse, then lying defenceless on the ground yesterday, under the shade of those trees, that he had suddenly realised how much the other man had come to mean to him. Only after the implications of how Krycek had risked his own life to save Mulder’s, had the Agent allowed himself to believe that Krycek might harbour the same feelings for him. But to hear Krycek put his thoughts into words was too much for him. "You’re right," he began, more angry with himself than with the man laying on the bed before him. "I don’t know if you killed my father or not... and I know that both Skinner and Scully are going to freak out in a major way once they find out how I feel, but damn it Krycek, Alex... I CAN’T HELP HOW I FEEL." He shouted the last words. "Do you think that this," He motioned between them, "Is easy for me? Do you think I want to feel this... this attraction... That I can just sweep what happened between us under some magic carpet and it will be roses forever.... I know exactly how Skinner and Scully are going to react... Hell you’re right. A week ago, I would have felt the same... But," he frantically searched for words, he desperately needed to make the other man understand, "But not now... Now I know exactly how I feel, and for whom, and I don’t care..." He moved forward, touching two gentle fingers to Alex’s cheek. "I’m willing to try... to fight to give us a future... I do live in the real world Krycek, and I fully understand what loving you entails, but at least I’m prepared to try. It’s not going to be easy, and yes, you might die Alex... Hell, for that matter I could walk into a bullet at any time... look at what happened at the warehouse... But I’m willing to try... To give us... a chance," he motioned between them again, "It’s got to be worth it Alex, otherwise there’s no point to any of this... we might just as well give up now, pack our bags... you’ll be well enough to leave in a few days... Skinner has give us that long... if that’s what you want, if that all that you really want, then fine... I won’t stop you... Hell I’ll even drive you to the nearest bus depot or airport myself... but don’t you dare sit there and tell me that you’re not prepared to try because you don’t think I can handle it... don’t you dare insult me that way."

Krycek had sat with a stunned expression stealing across his handsome face as Mulder’s words pounded into him. After Mulder had finished and remained standing over him, his chest raising and falling with anger, Krycek let out a small bark of laughter. With an expression of wonder on his face, he finally found his voice and said, "You really do love me."

Had that not been what he’d just said? Mulder closed his eyes feeling totally drained, and let his shoulders slump, as he agreed. "Yes Alex Krycek, double agent and all around rat bastard... I really do love you."

Krycek slowly rose up from the bed. He cautiously moved towards Mulder on wobbly legs, until he was standing directly in front of him. Gently he lifted a hand and pushed a stray lock of hair from the Agent’s sweaty brow, then leaning forward raising slightly on tiptoe he kissed the brow, the nose and finally the lips. Then standing back slightly he replied warmly, his green eyes reflecting the truth of his words, "I love you too Fox Mulder, very special Agent and all round smart arse."

Mulder eyes snapped open at those words and he looked hard at the man standing in front of him, searching his eyes to see if he was speaking the truth. Seeing the love that was shining back at him he groaned out loud and carefully reeled Alex in for another kiss, he pushed himself up against the trembling body, and was met and matched by a fire of Krycek’s own needs. Without a thought they tumbled backwards until they hit the bed and ended up sprawled on it. Mulder twisting part way to ensure that Krycek ended up on top.

A few feverish minutes passed where hot kisses were exchanged and clothes hastily removed, until flesh was pulsing against flesh, only the bandage separated them, and slight hiss of skin over skin. They discarded pants and underwear and were soon bucking against each other, as if to stop would end their world. Groans were emitted as their tongues met, and fought for right of passage. Mouths were explored, and hot lips were slowly trailed down each man’s body. Seeking, and finding, places that pleasured, until finally they reached their ultimate aim and engulfed each other’s cocks. Then they both concentrated on bringing the other pleasure as fighting tongues became gentle caresses, lips sucking, teeth delicately nipping, until with almost inaudible moans of exhilaration they each swallowed a flood of liquid from the other. This was what they had needed, what they had both tried to fight against, but had never really had any defence against.

A few moments passed in which only the sound of their heavy breathing could be heard, each drawing in much needed air as they lay lax and complacent against each other. Slowly, and with great effort, Mulder turned until he was pressed up against Krycek again, chest against chest, gently he licked the sweat from the other’s neck, trailing upwards until he stole another kiss that was willing given. "Can I take that to mean that you don’t want a lift to the bus depot?" he panted out the question, leaning up and, while resting his elbow on the bed, he gently wiped a stay lock of hair from Krycek’s brow.

Alex took a deep, satisfied, breath and smiled, it was pure devilment as he answered, "I think I’m going to need reminding at least once a day... that you love me." He gently stretched himself sensually against the other man, causing Mulder to draw a sudden breath as passion flared again.

"I think that we’d better get you into the bathroom before both of us are too exhausted to move."

"You know Mulder, there are times where you’re just a spoil sport." Krycek said around a huge yawn, his exertions catching up with his battle worn body.

Mulder smiled and planted another nibbling kiss on the side of Krycek’s lips, grimacing as his shaven cheek scratched against Krycek’s growing beard. "You do know that I’m going to have a whisker burn on my face." He stated slowly sitting up, noting the lines of pain that were etched about Alex’s features. While both had enjoyed the lovemaking immensely, Krycek was still recovering from his injury and his exhaustion was starting to show.

Climbing up from the bed, Mulder held out his hand and then caught Alex as he finally struggled to his feet and then stood swaying dangerously. With careful hands he manoeuvred Krycek to the bathroom, sat him on the toilet seat and gave him a quick sponge bath, with Mulder concentrating only on cleaning up the almost sleeping man. He adjusted the bandage once Alex was dried again.

Alex was very appreciative of the care and sat meekly on the toilet seat and allowed Mulder to shave him. If he was honest it was a very pleasant experience, and he was determined that the next bath, or shower, he had with Mulder, he was going to be more awake and prepared to take advantage of the sensual hands that wiped soap over his body. To be more able to enjoy the sensations caused by the long fingers that washed his hair so lovingly.

When Mulder assisted him to the couch in the living room Alex slumped down and was asleep before he fully registered that he was sitting up. Mulder spent the next few minutes drying the other man’s short silken hair, it was starting to grow out now, and Fox decided that he liked it longer and would talk to Alex about letting it grow. When it was dry enough Mulder stood and smiled down at his lover. His heart leapt at the word and he tested it again, liking the warm feeling that flooded him as he looked down at Alex. Then shaking himself he returned to the bedroom and after stripping the bed of it’s old linen, he remade it. Returning to the living room, he gently shook Alex and assisted him back to bed. The other man didn’t even wake up fully, just mumbled Mulder’s name under his breath, and allowed himself to be manoeuvred as Mulder directed. Soon he was tucked up once more in a clean, freshly made bed.

Several seconds passed before Mulder admitted that he could not help himself, and after taking a quick shower, he rubbed himself dry and then slipped into bed beside his lover. Cuddling up, he allowed sleep to overtake him, for once content with the hand that life had dealt him.

=-=-=-=-=

The rest of the day passed in a haze of cuddling and sleeping. When Mulder finally opened his eyes and looked bleary about he noted with shock that the sun was setting and the cabin was starting to grow cold and dark.

The urge to use the bathroom drove him from the bed. He quietly slipped out very aware of the handsome young man who was still sleeping deeply beside him. He knew that Krycek needed the sleep and that the last few days had exhausted him. Now he was fully awake, Mulder realised that he was cold and hungry, so he restarted the fire and got it blazing, allowing the heat to permeate the cabin before he detoured to the kitchen and began to toss together the makings of a meal. Checking the cupboards he pulled out a large tin of soup, and decided that sandwiches and soup was the order of the day.

As he worked he let his mind drift back over the very pleasant day that he had spent snuggling with his lover, Krycek had indeed turned out to be a very surprising bundle of fun and energy. Once Mulder had awoken to find the other man descending upon his ridged staff, his lips curling about the member with an ease that drove Mulder off the edge. Then they had spent a pleasant few minutes kissing, until Krycek had admitted defeat and slipped back into sleep. Mulder stopped, letting the word flow over him again. Alex Krycek was his lover.

He smiled to himself, then shaking off the momentary stasis he continued with preparing the meal. As he worked he thought about what they were going to do. He was not under any illusions, neither Skinner, nor his partner Scully, were going to be very forgiving, and he could just see their expressions when he informed them that he was in love with their number one suspect.

He took a steadying breath and, pushing those thoughts from his mind, he concentrated on making the sandwiches. There was little he could do about the matter until he had spoken more fully with Krycek, so there was not much use in worrying about the it. Alex’s words had been true in one respect, they had these few days, and Mulder was not going to squander them by worrying about their future just yet.

Suddenly there came a cry of such terror from the bedroom, that Mulder was through the door with his gun drawn before he even registered the fact that he had left the kitchen area of the cabin.

As he flicked the light on Mulder knew a few seconds of intense of fear when he saw that the bed was empty. A whimpering sound attracted his attention, and he spied his lover crouching over in the far corner, trying to make himself as small as possible and it looked like he was attempting to burrow into the wall of the cabin itself.

Seeing that the danger had come to his lover in the form of a nightmare, Mulder carefully placed the gun down, and headed towards Krycek, who was still shivering and whimpering, holding his arm out as if to ward off an attacker.

"Krycek," Mulder began, "Alex... baby..." he repeated when he didn’t get a reply. The other man just cried out and tried to dig himself deeper into the cabin floor. Mulder, unable to stand the sounds of suffering that his lover was issuing, made a grab for him, and held him while he weakly fought against the embrace. All the while Mulder murmured that he was there, that nothing was ever going to hurt Alex again and that he loved him. Some of his words must have penetrated the fear that surrounded Alex because he slowly began to calm down, his breathing no longer coming in ragged breaths as he fought some unseen force.

Finally he lay quiet, panting shallowly as he fought to get his breathing under control. He wrapped his arms about Mulder and held on as if his very life depended upon their contact, unheeding the pain to his injury this action caused, he needed to be in contact with his lover more, as he begged, "Don’t leave me... please don’t leave me." He began to chant as he tried to move closer to the Agent.

Mulder raised his hand and pressed Krycek’s sweat covered forehead to his lips and kissed him saying, "Never... never... they won’t ever get the chance to hurt you again, I swear they won’t." Mulder was surprised to feel tears in his own eyes as he made the promise, and he finally admitted to himself that if they ever did get their hands on the man in his arms, it would only be because he, Fox Mulder, was no longer alive to prevent it.

After several more minutes, Krycek began to struggle out of the too tight embrace, saying, "He shut me in that damn silo with it Fox... he left me there to die." Mulder could hear the unshed tears that trembled in his lover’s voice and it made him weep inside to hear such pain.

"Who?" Mulder asked, "Who shut you in the silo Alex?" While he had a fairly good idea whom Krycek was talking about, he knew that it would be better for Alex to get his fears out into the open.

"Cancerman... once he had the data tape from that damn alien... he just... he just left me there to die."

Mulder closed his eyes and held the other man tighter against his chest, as he asked, "How did you escape?"

The body in his arms froze, all movement stopped including the breathing, until finally Mulder had to open his own eyes and look down at the man he held so tightly.

"You knew." Krycek accused his eyes flashing with anger and a ripple of betrayal.

"You knew!!"

Mulder closed his eyes as he hurried on to explain, "Only that you were taken over by the alien in Hong Kong... but that was not until later... much later... I thought that you were dead," he confessed, surprised to hear his own pain at his confession.

"Why didn’t you say something?" Krycek demanded, pushing the other man away slightly, his anger giving him the energy to force his fear aside. Waking up in the darkened bedroom had reminded him too much of his days spent in the silo and he had reacted to the nightmare before he could stop himself. But now, now that he had something more immediate to concentrate on he was able to drag some semblance of sanity back into his life in the form of anger towards his lover, at what he perceived as a betrayal.

"Why didn’t you?" Mulder shot back, in the age-old argument of lovers. "Why didn’t you?" he repeated again, this time slower, showing that he really, wanted to understand why Krycek had kept that piece of information from him.

Krycek saw the truth behind the other’s words and he bit his bottom lip, unable to meet Mulder’s intense look as he finally confessed, "I... I didn’t think that you would believe me... I mean... me." He let out a small shattered bark of laughter, "Me being possessed by aliens...." He ended with a sob and reaching up, rubbed at the tears that had fallen during his flashback to the silo. "God I hate this... this feeling that crawls over me, when I... when I..." he stopped looking up at Mulder, as if only his ex-partner could say the words that would take his pain away. To Mulder he looked like a six-year-old going on thirty, with his grubby, tear stained face, and pleading expression.

It was an image that Mulder was unable to resist, no-one should have eyelashes that long and reaching out he gently wiped at the wet trail saying, "Tell me about it Alex... tell me about it now.. it will help... I promise you." It wasn’t a demand, but an offer to help, an offer that Krycek was unable to resist.

He began to speak, slowly at first as he tried to remember exactly what had happened, "I don’t really remember much after I walked into the men’s bathroom at Hong Kong airport, just that suddenly there was a woman standing beside me, and before I could react she’d.... she’d" he searched for the right words and ended up saying weakly, "zapped me... and the next real memory I have was of kneeling over this... this thing and... and vomiting up my soul, man it was... it was everywhere... this stuff... it was like oil and was in my eyes, nose... mouth... skin... pores... I couldn’t breathe.. I honestly thought that I was going to die there... I don’t know... I don’t know how much time passed..." he stopped, and allowed the other man to comfort him, accepting the gentle embrace for what it was. "I wanted to die then, when I realised where I was... when I knew that I was going to be left there... I wanted to die... it was... just like what my father use to do to me... Cancerman just left me there... just like my father... but he left me there to die..."

"But you didn’t." Mulder spoke softly, but firmly, wanting the other man to know that he had lived through that nightmare and survived, had in fact become stronger from his terrible ordeal.

"Yes, "I lived..." Krycek conceded. He turned to look into Mulder’s eyes, wanting the other man to see that he was not lying when he spoke the next words. "But I don’t have the slightest idea why."

"What...?" Mulder began in surprise, not sure what Alex was trying to say, but Krycek hurried on saying.

"I don’t remember how I survived... I mean... I knew that I was there... trapped in that hell hole with that... that thing, for how long I can’t remember... I must have finally passed out or something... ‘cause the next thing I remember... I was out of there... just laying on the ground, out in the open... there was water nearby, and I managed to stagger to a farmhouse that was not too far away... they were good people and took me in...." He stopped and rubbed at his tired face. "I don’t know why they didn’t call the police or just turn me in... I mean I really, really looked a mess... that oil... it was like a thin coating over my whole body... it took three straight baths just to get it damn stuff of me...."

"Can you remember their names?" Mulder asked, then seeing the confused look this earned him he continued, "The people who lived in the farmhouse... can you remember their names."

"No." Alex slowly shook his head, as if this was the first time he had thought about that particular question. "I never asked them and they never said... To be honest, I didn’t want to know. What I didn’t know I couldn’t tell if the Smoker got hold of me again, he wouldn’t want to leave any live witnesses. I just stayed with them for about a week... I was out of it for pretty much most of it, then he drove me to the local town and paid for a bus ticket for me..."

Mulder, feeling the body under his hands begin to shake again, gently shushed the other man, and pulled him back into a firm embrace. "Look, judging from the smell coming from the kitchen, I think the soup I put on has got to be completely burnt, but I can always put some more on... why don’t you come and sit on the couch while I get us something to eat."

Krycek slowly nodded, understanding that Mulder was trying to put some space between his nightmare and his confession. It was still too raw a wound to be properly explored just yet. When he was feeling stronger, they could discuss it again.

As Mulder helped Alex to stand, Krycek reached out and grabbed the other’s arm preventing him from moving as he said, "I never meant to lie to you Fox... it’s just that... well, remembering..."

Mulder stopped, and taking the hand he offered, "That’s in the past... all I ask is that you don’t ever lie to me in the future... that’s the only promise I want from you now Alex... don’t lie to me again...ever."

Krycek swallowed hard at the determination that he saw in Mulder’s eyes and knew that to lie to this man would be to lose him, and he swore to himself that that was something he didn’t ever want to happen. "I won’t," he agreed as he allowed Mulder to help him up. He swayed for a few moments until a reassuring, steady arm was placed about his waist and he was helped out, then carefully deposited on the couch, with a blanket draped over him.

As he has suspected, Mulder could see clouds of steam rising from the saucepan on the stove and thought he would probably have to buy another set of pans for the cabin. After he was sure that Krycek was settled he rushed to the pan and grabbing up a cloth he threw the whole steaming lot into the sink, then he proceeded to open the front door and a window to allow for the smell to escape the cabin.

"I get the overwhelming feeling that I’m going to be the cook in this relationship." Krycek said with a smile from the couch, as he watched Mulder delve into the cupboard and pull out another large can, before snatching up the tin opener.

"You can cook?" Mulder asked, pausing in his surprise, and unable to hide the hopeful look that had entered his eyes, as this unexpected bonus from his lover.

"Yes... it’s a hobby of mine."

Mulder looked at the can, then back at his lover. Then plastering a smile across his face he replied warmly, "This relationship thing just keeps getting better and better."

"Arrr man." Krycek grumbled good-naturedly, as the nightmare began to fade in the light of their banter, "And I thought it was my body that you were after."

Mulder bit back another smile, as he retorted evilly, "That’s what I’m planing on having for desert most evenings."

Krycek laughed. "In that case we’d better order the whipped cream by the

case load"

Mulder opened his mouth to answer, then snapped it shut. He knew that if they continued this particular conversation then neither of them would get round to eating food and another saucepan would be ruined, so he wisely keep his own counsel.

Krycek seeing the look that entered his lover’s eyes just leant his head back on the couch and smiled. While he was still feeling shaky from his nightmare, and weak from the effects of his injury, he knew that once dinner had been eaten they would not be talking about aliens. They would be making some inroads in some explorations of their own, and the only X file involved in it would be the X at the end of seX. He let another smile slip onto his face as he considered passing that little titbit onto his lover.

=-=-=-=-=

It was the sound of the birds, crying out once again to welcome the new day that awoke Mulder the next morning. Glancing at the clock on the bedside stand, he let his head fall back on the pillow when he saw that it was only 17 after 6.

He shifted slightly, turning on his side to look at his lover. Krycek was still deeply asleep, one of his arms had sneaked across Mulder’s body during the night, and the Agent now reached down to hold it more secure across his stomach. It felt natural to wake up with this man sleeping beside him.

He closed his eyes and drifted, and when he next awoke it was just after nine. With a sigh of resignation he made to pull back the covers, but a tightening of the arm across him prevented him from doing so. Glancing down he looked right into Krycek smiling features.

"Good Morning." Alex murmured, his voice low and sexy.

Mulder swallowed hard as he felt himself rise to the occasion. "Good Morning to you," he replied, slipping over to plant a kiss upon the welcoming lips. It was only meant to be a touching of lips, but Krycek had other plans and the next twenty minutes were taken over by another intense love session, leaving both men sated and breathing heavily.

They both drifted again, this time each lightly petting the other’s upper body. Finally Mulder spoke, hating to break the companionably silence, "Alex, we’re going to have to talk about where we go from here."

Mulder felt Alex tense up, but continued to gently draw small circles up and down the other man’s back.

Finally, in an attempt to lighten the mood Krycek answered, "Well, gauging from our er... state I would have thought the shower was the next logical progression."

"And after?" Mulder asked, with a lazy smile.

"Then the kitchen... food... I definitely need sustenance... you’re wearing me out Mulder... do you know that?"

"It’s my pleasure," Mulder replied tenderly before asking again, "And then?"

Krycek let out a sigh of his own and continued, "And then, after we’ve been washed, dressed and fed, I guess it’ll be time to contact Skinner and see what kind of a deal he can offer."

"I want to stay with you Alex... whatever the deal is, we will be together."

Krycek squeezed the body slightly under him and offered, "You know you can’t do that.... Not if you want to catch these bastards...." Mulder opened his mouth as if to protest, but Krycek reached out a gentle hand and laid it carefully across the full lips, preventing him from answering and speaking instead, "They will place me in the deepest possible hole and only bring me out to testify.... We both know how it works and," he stopped again, the words not easy for him. "And we both know that it’s for the best... If they knew that they could get to me though you..." The hand slipped from Mulder’s lips to his cheek, it was a tender, loving caress, "You would never be safe, and I would willingly give up my life to ensure your safety... you know that?"

Mulder raised his hand and gently placed it over the other’s. Looking deep into the green eyes he answered honestly, "As would I. But..." he added, and this time his look prevented Krycek from butting in, "I am not willing to lose you either... I have... I have...." He stopped, angry at himself at not being able to put into words the emotions that he was feeling, taking a deep breath, removing and clasping the hand that rested upon his face within his two he spoke slowly, determined to make his lover understand. "I have lost everyone... everyone I ever loved, lost them to those bastards... but I will not lose you... I couldn’t survive that... please understand that.... If you learn nothing else about me, know that now that I’ve found you I am never, ever, going to let you go. Not unless..." He paused his own fears coming to the fore, "Not unless you don’t want me..." he trailed off letting his words hang, desperately waiting for an answer, but too terrified to ask.

Krycek saw the hidden pain, insecurity and rushed to reassure his lover, hating to see that pain within the other’s handsome face. "From the first time I saw you, I knew that I was attracted to you... and all that bull I told you... when we first met... it wasn’t a lie you know. You were... are a legend at Quantico, and I was so proud to be working with you... Once I got to know you... saw your dedication... I just knew...." Alex suddenly looked away. "I don’t know why this is so hard for me to say, but I really want you to understand why I did what I did, and why I’m not lying now...." He looked back at Mulder and there was a pleading look to be believed in his eyes as he continued, "You see.... Why is this so difficult to put into words? My original job was just to watch you... to keep track of you, point you in the odd wrong direction and, above all, to keep you safe... I started off telling myself that I was only doing my job and ended up knowing that I was doing it because I loved you...."

Mulder felt the moment grow, and knew that mere words were not going to be able to fully express their feelings for each other. Their fears, hopes... only a lifetime of living together would be able to do that, and that was the reason why Mulder was prepared to give up so much of his other beliefs to be with this man. Seeing the question in Krycek’s eyes he smiled warmly, and leaning forward he kissed the lips that melted under his before saying, "I will never regret loving you, nor will I regret remaining by your side... you are the other half of my soul..." he smiled wryly at the words. He knew that he sounded like a cheap dime store novel, but, for once in his life the words felt right and they needed to be said. So he kissed the lips again before continuing, "Get used to seeing me standing behind you in the bathroom every morning when you shave, and I’ll be the last thing you see before you fall asleep at night."

Krycek smiled, then planting his own kiss in return, said, "Behind my while a shave... why Mulder, I didn’t know you have a kinky steak..."

"You’d better believe it baby." Before Mulder could continue with his attack on his lover’s lips, Krycek’s stomach rumbled loudly. Knowing when he was beaten, Mulder gave him one last kiss and climbed from the bed. Krycek groaned, and moving slowly, followed him.

They talked of little things while breakfast was prepared, stealing and planting kisses, pats and caresses, it was as if they had been lovers for years instead of days. They fitted together so perfectly, that words seemed superfluous, as they reached and passed items without the need to ask for them.

The meal passed in companionable silence. Once they had both finished eating they headed towards the small bathroom. While Mulder showered, Krycek did an awkward face shave wondering if he could use his injury to get Fox to shave him again, then he showered while Mulder scrapped the razor over his face. Once they were finished, Mulder inspected Krycek’s wound, pleased to see that it was healing well. They had just decided that a walk about the lake was in order to wash away the cobwebs from their minds, when Mulder sat up straighter and reached for his gun, "Car" he said in a voice barely above a whisper.

Krycek jumped up and looked about, his expression slightly wild, he had spent so long running that it was now second nature to seek cover. Mulder seeing the expression stepped forward and rested a hand gently, but firmly on his shoulder, saying strongly, "Together... whatever happens we are in this together."

Krycek felt his body relaxing and after nodding his head once, he swallowed hard and pushed his fear back as he saw the determination in his lovers eyes, could he do any less then Mulder. "What do we do?" He asked, watching as Mulder headed towards the window and peered out. A car was just pulling up next to the one outside. He frowned as he thought he recognised it, the frown slowly turned into real anger as his partner and AD Skinner climbed out of the car. Both of them looked about the site with keen interest.

Without a thought, Mulder yanked open the door, stormed out of the cabin and was standing in front of his boss, his face contorted with rage. "What the hell are you doing here?" he demanded, pushing up right into Skinner’s personal space.

To give Skinner his due he did not react badly to his subordinate’s action, in fact he had expected it. Instead he just looked at Mulder, giving him a hard, measuring look, then stepped around him, heading towards the cabin saying instead, "I think this is a conversation that would be better off taking place inside, don’t you think?" He didn’t wait for an answer, but made his way into the cabin with Scully following him, and Mulder bringing up the rear, anger still radiating from him.

All three paused as they spied Krycek who had moved to stand within the small kitchen area, holding up a pot of freshly brewed coffee. He smiled somewhat shakily, then asked, in a forced over-friendly tone, "Anyone for coffee?"

Skinner hesitated a moment in shock, then seemingly pushing whatever emotions he felt to one side, he continued into the room removing his coat as he said, "I’ll have mine black, no sugar."

Krycek poured the coffee, before moving over to hand it carefully to the man he had brutally beaten up only a few months previously, then heading back he asked, "Scully?"

"The same," she replied, while throwing Mulder a confused look, "Please.. black... no sugar."

"My you two have gotten so... so healthy since we last met." It was meant to lighten the atmosphere, but it fell disastrously short and an awkward silence filled the room, while he fidgeted about getting Scully, Mulder and himself a coffee.

Once all four were seated, Skinner and Scully on one side living room and Mulder, Krycek on the other, Mulder demanded, "You said I had five days... it’s only been..."

"The five day agreement was on the understanding that you kept in touch with Scully... you didn’t do that... so here we are." Skinner’s tone didn’t hold a hint of apology, and Mulder knew from experience that it would do not good to argue with the man, so instead he turned to his partner.

"How did you find us?"

Scully shot Skinner a quick look, and he nodded slightly, indicating that she should explain to them, "We were able to trace your cell phone... it took some time, but you left it on yesterday... and well, we got the general area before the battery failed..."

"So you both just thought you’d drop in and say hi... and allowed god knows who to follow you..." throwing Krycek a quick concerned looked, Mulder made to stand ordering, "Get your stuff Alex... we’re out of here."

"Not so fast Agent Mulder." Skinner snapped angrily at his subordinate, "We were not followed.... I made sure of that... and you are not going anywhere, least ways not with Alex Krycek, who, if you can remember, is a wanted man."

"Wanted..."Mulder asked, his tone one of surprise, "Wanted by whom and for what?" he questioned innocently.

"Mulder." Scully asked, her tone one of shocked surprised, and unable to keep quiet any longer, "You know that Krycek is wanted by both the FBI and the local police for questioning." She shot the man in question a hard look before she finished, "For a number of criminal offences."

Mulder stood up again and frowned down at his partner. He was not happy to see either of them here, but he was not going to let them win easily, so he spoke in a measured tone, "I’ve been doing some thinking about that. I mean, to my knowledge Alex has not actually been accused of committing any illegal offences."

"He stole the Data tape," Skinner snarled, anger flaring across his face as he remembered the beating he had received at the hands of the man who was now sitting so innocently sipping his coffee. While he appeared relaxed, Skinner could see the tension that radiated from the man, he might appear totally at ease, but the AD was convinced that he could leap into violent action at the drop of a hat.

"And I’m sure the American people would love to hear my testimony on that little subject." Krycek slipped into the conversation, his tone was calm and his eyes were chips of ice.

"You attacked me," Skinner insisted, his face reflecting his anger.

"And of course... you reported that as soon as you were able?" Both Alex and Skinner knew that he had not done so as Krycek continued, "Because it’s really going to look strange if you try to report it now...." All three could tell that Alex was getting a certain amount of satisfaction from the conversation, and Mulder threw him a warning look. Krycek caught the glance and controlled his own anger.

Mulder stood silent for a few moments, allowing tempers to cool, before he continued, "Look, no-one here is saying that Krycek doesn’t have some problems, but he also has some very valuable information. Information that we can use... and placing him behind bars won’t help us... it will only make him an easier target for those who want to put him out of commission permanently."

"Mulder." Scully interrupted, "you know he cannot be trusted..."

Mulder threw Krycek another warning glance, when he saw the other man open his mouth to protest his innocence, saying before he could speak, "I trust him." He said it with total conviction and winced as Scully gasped and spluttered.

"You trust him.... Mulder...you accused him of killing your father and now you’re saying that you trust him?"

"I didn’t kill Mulder’s father...." Krycek spat out, jumping up, hardly noticing the flash of pain that ripped across his upper chest, not that it was reflected in his features. He glared at the woman and continued, "I was there...." He saw the look of total shock swiftly followed by hurt betrayal that cross Mulder’s features and groaned at the pain it caused him. He reached out and grabbed the other man’s arm before he could move out of reach. "I didn’t kill him... I was there to warn him... I’d heard..." he stopped trying to gather his thoughts, how could he tell in a few seconds what he had taken weeks to gather. "I’d heard... that they... they were going to do something to Mulder... I didn’t know what it was... but then your father name’s was mentioned, the source was reliable, and I was told that he was considered to be slightly... unstable... they didn’t know which way he was going to go, and that he wanted to talk to his son." He let out a small bark of laughter, as he wiped his hand across his mouth and stated as firmly as his quivering voice allowed, "and that was not to be allowed... I... I panicked..." He swallowed hard, his Adam’s apple moving as he felt a wave a nauseous sweep over him, but he forcibly pushed it aside to finish his story. "By the time I arrived, Mulder was already there... so I... I climbed in through the bathroom window... I swear I was just trying to see if I could hear what was being discussed. What your father’s intentions really were...." He didn’t bother to mention that if he older Mulder had shown any signs of hurting his son, then Krycek would have been the one to put the bullet in him. "Your father came into the bathroom... God I thought he was going to see me, and panic. So I hid in the bath, behind the shower curtain, until I was certain that he wouldn’t." He stopped, knowing that what he was to say now would either allow him to keep Mulder’s love or to lose it forever. "I’d just made myself known to him, and had stepped out of the shower, when the shot came from behind me... through the bathroom window... it caught your father just as he was turning... I am so sorry Fox..." he felt tears swell as he mumbled, forcing the words out, "I... I don’t know if the shot was meant for me or your father..." Alex shot the other two a look and wished the Mulder and himself could have had this conversation at some other time, and not before these two particular witnesses.

"You were there?" Mulder asked, his voice indicating that he was having a hard time analysing what Alex had just told him. He moved out of Krycek’s grasping reach, his face twisting as he realised that what he had feared had become reality. "When my father was shot... you were there... I thought..." he stopped unable to go on, his throat tight.

Krycek seeing the expression that now rested upon his lover’s face, backed away, his own heart breaking, "I’m sorry..." he spluttered, then the intensity of the moment caught up with him and he rushed into the bathroom. As the door slammed behind him all three people could hear him throwing up.

Silence filled the cabin for several minutes after the sounds had ceased, until finally Scully stood and offered, "I’d better got check on him."

"The window’s too small... he can’t get out," Mulder replied, cold, calculating, an Agent once more watching his prisoner, his mind still occupied by the story that Krycek had told.

Scully looked confused for a few moments then her face cleared as she said, "I wasn’t concerned about that Mulder... but he looked pretty rough before he rushed in there."

Mulder watched Scully as she moved to the door, knocked quietly before opening it and entering. As the door closed behind her, Mulder turned back to Skinner and stated, "I still trust him." Scully’s actions had allowed him to gather himself, and he knew that he had reacted badly. The shock had prevented him from thinking as rationally as he would have wished. Now he had hurt his lover again, after all their brave words of that morning, he had again thought evil of the man he professed to love.

"You trust him?" Skinner enquired, not sure that he liked the niggling suspicion he was starting to form about his younger agent, "But do you believe him?"

Mulder needed to do something, needed to give himself some time and space before he answered that particular question. He headed towards the kitchen and prepared another pot of coffee.

Skinner watched him work for a few moments before he stood and moved closer, "You know he can’t be trusted... no matter what he tells you, you’ll never believe him... he’s told so many lies... and can you ever forget that he worked for Cancerman once.... What’s to stop him from turning traitor again?"

Mulder slammed down his coffee cup and snarled, "That’s where you’re wrong. You can’t trust him or believe him because you’ve walked the same pathway as he has... You’ve sold part of your soul to Cancerman, just as he did."

"I never..." Skinner began, his own anger flaring, but Mulder interrupted, not allowing rational thought to enter into the conversation as he battled his own internal devils.

"Krycek was used, sir. They got to him when he was in the academy, playing upon his patriotism as a first generation American. He didn’t stand a chance. Do I believe him when he tells me that he had come to warn my father when he was shot, and that he didn’t pull the trigger?" He stopped, unable to prevent the shaking that threatened to overtake him, and took a deep, steadying, breath. Looking up he met Skinner’s eyes so that the AD could see that Mulder was not lying., "Yes... I do... I believe that he didn’t kill my father..." Mulder’s eyes slipped closed as he finished, "And I also believe him when he says that the bullet might have been meant for him..."

"Mulder.." Scully’s voice cut across the tension that controlled the room and the two angry men in it, "I really think Krycek needs to lay down... he... he’s going into shock..."

Mulder was across the room and in the bathroom before she had finished, and he could tell at once that she was right. Krycek lay half leaning up against the toilet and half against the wall, he was almost wedged into the small gap between the wall and the toilet bowl. He had lent his head back, exposing his throat and he looked deathly pale, sweat beading his face and he was still swallowing convulsively. A heavy smell of vomit hung about the room.

"Krycek," Mulder began, then seeing that he wasn’t getting any response he leant nearer and snapped, "Alex.." This got the other man to open his eyes, but what he saw there almost caused him to gasp out in pain. Krycek was tormented, he knew what he had lost, and it was tearing his soul apart and Mulder could see it all reflected in his eyes.

The pain was too much and Mulder had to answer it. He reached down and gently, carefully, tilted the head towards him, reaching forward he laid a small line of kisses across the brow and down the cheek to rest for a moment over the lips. "I believe you... I believe you, and I love you." It was only ten words, and yet to Krycek it stopped his world from melting about him. His eyes snapped opened, a new fire of hope burning in them, as he searched his lover’s face, looking for any sign of subterfuge, and finding none.

"We will talk about it later... and you can explain it all to me. Everything..." Mulder continued, glad to see the look of sanity return to Alex’s eyes. How much this man had lost, and how much he feared losing what remained, had just become very clear to Mulder. If he turned from Alex now he was convinced that the man would not survive the night, "But not now, now I need you to get up from there and come and lay down... Please."

Krycek didn’t want to move, he felt as if he could stay there, next to the toilet, for the rest of his life. His shoulder and arm hurt, his back was sore, and his throat raw. He had cried as he threw up, too distressed to care, and knew that he looked a mess, and yet Mulder still loved him. Had said that he believed him, and loved him, and for that alone he would walk into fire if this man asked him.

So he struggled to stand, accepting the eager assistance that Mulder offered, and when he would have tilted back towards earth upon standing, it was Mulder’s strong arm that sneaked about his waist to hold him upright, and solicitously helped him walk into the bedroom. Scully hurried ahead and pulled the sheets back and then left her partner to firmly tuck them about the sick man after he’d been settled down upon the bed. Mulder fetched some water and watched while Krycek swallowed a couple of painkillers, before he said, "You just lay here and rest... I’m going to talk to the others, and Alex... I need you to trust me this time.. can you do that, with what I have to tell them?"

Krycek tiredly nodded his head, he could feel sleep creeping over him and knew that he no longer had the energy to fight it. This morning he had felt like he could take on the world, but after telling Mulder about his father, he now felt as if keeping his eyes open would be the hardest thing he’d ever had to do.

Mulder waited until he was certain that Krycek was deeply asleep before he left the room, he pulled the door to, but did not close it fully as he intended to listen in case Alex called for him.

He stopped when he saw the two people standing before him. Scully had finished making the coffee and held out a cup for him as he moved towards them, he accepted it gratefully and took a slip before sitting down. For some reason he now felt in a better frame of mind, and he also knew that he was now fighting for both Alex’s and his future, and that gave him an energy that he had not felt for such a long while.

Scully started, "Skinner say’s that you believe Krycek’s version of your father’s death?" it was a question and was accompanied by a prettily raised eyebrow.

Mulder closed his eyes and considered his options, and realised that they were very few, so he opted for the truth. He glanced first at his partner, who he loved as a sister and then at his boss who he had come to respect and trust over time. "Yes I do, and before we go any further I think that I should explain... I love him." There he had said it.

Skinner looked confused for several moments, as his suspicions were realised, and without it a sinking feeling hit at his stomach before he clarified weakly, "Your father..."

"No..." Mulder said, taking another sip of coffee and noting how calm he sounded, especially as his own hands were shaking slightly. "Krycek... I’m in love with Alex Krycek."

"Krycek... isn’t this all rather sudden Mulder." Scully said, her tone that of a shocked adult rebuking a child. Mulder hated her when she used that tone.

"Is it?" he questioned back, realising that he had in fact loved the other man for quite a while, he’d just never had the guts to admit it to himself until a few days ago.

"Krycek," Skinner said, his face pale and his tone one of shock, although now that he thought about it, it did make a lot of sense, but he still didn’t have to agree with it, "You love Krycek.... I mean this isn’t some kind of sick joke or an attempt to win his trust in some way?"

Mulder closed his eyes as Skinner’s words and firmly shook his head, "No joke, I really love him, and I would never play that kind of game to get information... besides Alex is far too cleaver to fall for that."

"I could order you to go and see the departmental shrink, you know that Mulder." Skinner snapped, still hoping that his best agent was throwing a bad joke at him, "You risk losing your job, your standing... Christ... you could be throwing everything away... everything you’ve worked for... he’s a lying double crossing son of a bitch, who will tell you exactly what you want to hear...in or out of bed." He finished nastily.

Mulder let Skinner’s words wash over him, the man wasn’t saying anything that he hadn’t told himself over the last week or so. After Skinner had spluttered to a stop, Scully moved forward and asked sternly.

"Are you sure?"

He looked her deep in the eyes, his own face drawn and tired, as he slowly nodded and replied with conviction, "Yes."

"I don’t know Mulder... what Skinner says makes a lot of sense, you could lose everything... then Cancerman and his cronies would have won."

"Don’t you think I don’t know that Scully." Mulder suddenly leapt up from the seat, his own face twisted with anger as he ranted, "Don’t you think that hasn’t been my one thought since I realised that I loved him.. but I can’t forget this, or brush it under a carpet... it’s happened, it’s a fact and I’ve got to live with it. I’ve realised now that I fell for him the first day I met him, and when I thought that he had betrayed me...." He laughed shakily, "To paraphrase an old saying, ‘Hell hath no fury like a man scorned’. I blamed him for every bad thing that happened to me."

Again a tense silence filled the room as all three people contemplated the future. Until finally Skinner, sighed deeply, resigned to what Mulder had told him, he asked, "What damage control can we do."

"No." Mulder began heatedly, "no damage control.. I won’t give Alex up, I’ve lost too many people I love to this... this thing, I’m not going to lose him as well..."

"No one’s asking you to give Krycek up Mulder." Scully began, throwing Skinner an annoyed look. She could see that her partner was deadly serious, and while she might not fully understand it, she did realise that what he said about losing people was true. So, if he did truly love Alex, then as much as it would hurt her, she would still stand by him, and more importantly, be there if the other man betrayed him and left him to suffer.

Skinner shrugged his shoulders and commented dryly, "It’s a consideration, but..." He hurried on before Mulder could answer, "There has to be an alternative... a way for everyone to be happy... and by that I mean, we get the information that Krycek has, and you get Krycek." He spoke the words as if Mulder was asking for permission to keep a pet snake that he had found.

Mulder had again to bite his tongue. He so wanted to argue with the other man, but he knew that getting even this far was further then he had hoped, they were at least prepared to consider them staying together and for now that was enough.

"Alex has already stated that he is prepared to do anything necessary to assist us, he hates that bastard as much as we do... if not more." Mulder paused before he added, "We could try and go for a grand jury... He’s willing to testify... But, once he does that, we will have to join the witness protection programme. Unfortunately, I think we could only take down Cancerman, which, while it would be personally satisfying, would not actually achieve much beyond that."

"Krycek will need to be protected... once they know that he’s been in contact with us, they will come after him," Scully stated, her quick mind already working on the problem. "And the attack at the warehouse... it was aimed at both of you Mulder... those men were dug in for the night... they had us pinned down and we were low on ammo. If Krycek hadn’t taken one of them out, we very probably wouldn’t be alive right now." She stopped, letting the implications sink in. She could tell from the expressions on the men’s faces that neither like the implications.

"We need to keep them both safe then," Skinner confirmed, moving to take up a seat of his own, his tall frame bending to fit into the small chair. His hopes of dragging Krycek off to some prison cell and leaving him to rot were swiftly disappearing, under the determination of his wayward agent. He swallowed the flash of jealousy that he felt and wondered at its sudden appearance.

"Maybe we could get Krycek to make notes of all that he knows, and then leave it about the country, in places where they are to be opened and sent to the press if anything happens to either you or him. Use it as a deterrent," Scully said, chewing her bottom lip as she contemplated the problem.

Skinner shook his head saying, "Knowing the way they work Scully, I would have to say that Krycek’s information doesn’t go that high... the only man he is really a danger to is Cancerman, the other’s above him appear to be untouchable."

"Cancerman is the only one we have to really worry about, and you’re right, a grand jury won’t bring down the top dogs, but it would frighten an awful lot of people, so don’t dismiss it totally... Frightened men make mistakes." Krycek spoke from the doorway of the bedroom, he still looked drained, and swayed dangerously as he stood there. Mulder leapt up to steady him.

"Alex," he admonished, "you should be resting."

Krycek looked at Mulder, saw the concern and weakly smiled before answering, "This is our future we’re discussing, and I need to be a part of it."

Mulder could not argue with him, so he assisted him over to the couch, and while helping him sit down, asked, "Do you want a drink."

"Please, some water would be nice." Krycek spoke, his tone low, as he refused to met the other’s look. Mulder frowned, then hurried to fetch the drink. When he returned he sat down beside his lover, throwing both Skinner and Scully a defiant look.

"You were saying Krycek?" Skinner asked, once the other man was settled, and had sipped from the glass.

Krycek lent his head back on the seat and looked at his former boss from half closed eyes as he began to speak, "Cancerman is the only one we have to convince, he will do the rest..."

"You’re giving him an awful lot of power aren’t you?" Scully asked, her tone enquiring.

Krycek nodded, "Yes, he has a lot of pull, and his fingers are in an awful lot of pies. Also, he only tells the men above him what he wants them to know. I have some... information he would not want anyone to know about... I feel that we could use that against him."

"What information?" Skinner demanded, sitting straighter in his chair.

Krycek eyed the other man, not sure that he fully trusted him, but a quick glance at Mulder got him a slight nod of his head so he continued, "He now has the data tape."

"We know that," Scully said, moving from behind the counter.

"Yes." Krycek agreed, "You do... but they don’t. He told those above him that it had been destroyed. That’s why the pressure has been off me for the last few months. He expected me to die in that Silo. No-one knew I was there, I don’t even know if he knows that I’m still alive or not... but the data tape retrieval was his operation... we can use that information against them, and use the fact that we know he has it against him... he won’t push too hard... I’m just small fry to him, and for some reason he’s been instrumental in making sure no harm comes to Mulder."

"Why..." Skinner butted in, "Why has he been protecting Mulder?"

Krycek paused, it was a question that he’d often asked himself, as he lay in his bed in the dark of the night, slowly he shook his head stating honestly, "I don’t know. But, it is important to him. He had first Scully, then myself, placed next to Mulder to watch him and report back to him, and I was specifically told that Mulder’s continual health was directly linked to my own. That was made very clear to me." He reached out, made suddenly nervous by the intense attention he was getting from all the occupants of the room, and was pleased when Mulder captured the seeking hand and clasped it tightly in his own, it gave him strength for what he was about to say. "There is only one way that we can be free of him, and the threat of the others. That...." He felt his resolve waver, but turned his look upon the man he had grown to love over the past year to give him the strength, as he continued, "And that is to confront him, and to do that I will have to met with him..."

"NO." Mulder cried, turning to glare at his lover. "He will kill you where you stand, he has no reason not too, he’s already tried... in the silo."

"That wasn’t the first time either. The morning after I, er, got the tape from Mr Skinner, I was supposed to die in a car bomb. But I noticed that the other two guys were acting strangely when they went into a store. I saw the clock on the dash flashing, and ran.... I was about 50 yards away when it exploded. A few more seconds and...."

Noting the horrified expressions on his listener’s faces, he smiled slightly.

Skinner recovered his wits first. "What makes you think he’ll listen, that he won’t try again and succeed this time?"

"I have Mulder on my side," Krycek replied confidently, as the plan grew in his mind. He was nothing if not a survivor, the last year had proved that, and now that he really had something to fight for, he was putting his hard learned lessons to good use. "He will listen to what I have to say, and, if we don’t make it convincing enough, then he will kill me, but he will listen Mulder... that I can guarantee."

"I will not allow you to take that risk," Mulder snapped storming up from the seat and walked rapidly across the room to the window, as if putting distance between them could help him cope with the threat to his lover. Unable to hide the hurt he felt that Krycek would risk himself so willingly, in a venture that he was sure would not work.

Krycek looked away from the keen look of betrayal that he saw flash across his lover’s face. It hurt. It hurt a lot more then he thought it would.

"I have to agree with Mulder on this," Scully said, surprising both her partner and their boss. Seeing the look her words earned her, she hurried on. "Krycek is still a threat to his position, and the fact that he is still alive must be an accurate embarrassment to the Cancerman... who must have lost face by his continual survival, and why hasn’t he admitted to getting the data tape back?"

"Power and protection Scully, they give him power and protection over those above him, and Scully I didn’t know you cared." Krycek slipped in, but retreated back a bit as she frowned at him and told him firmly.

"I don’t... about you... but I do care about Mulder."

"Touché." Krycek mumbled under his breath as the tension in the cabin eased slightly.

"Scully is right... he has no real reason to keep you alive Alex." Mulder offered, turning back to look at his lover, trying to tell him with his eyes that he was to important to lose. "It would be insane."

Krycek saw and accepted the look gratefully as he smiled a warm smile of his own and offered a defence of his decision, "You know... you’re all forgetting that there is a logical reason why he wants me dead, and that’s because I am a threat to him... I know things that no-one else knows... and I can prove what I know... if it were to become public knowledge then nothing... nothing could prevent certain members of his own group from seeking retribution."

Skinner suddenly learnt forward, his expression becoming sharp as he asked, "And this is what you would testify too?"

Krycek felt a ripple of shock course through him at the other’s words, but he realised that, if he wanted the two people before him to help him, then he had to give them what they wanted. "Even if the knowledge endangers your life?" he asked, annoyed with himself as he heard the slight shake of his tone.

"I thought you wanted protection in return for your testimony?" Skinner snarled, feeling that Krycek was once more playing with them.

"If you... want me to... I will testify, but only concerning that which directly affected me and what I saw... while working in his employ...." He shook his head, they would never truly understand what he knew, and what he could tell. There was some stuff that he’d read on the data tape that he would never tell anyone, because to breathe one word of it would mean certain death to both himself, and whomever he told. But that was information that he was keeping in reserve, he would only use it save the life of a person who meant more to him than his own life, because that is what it would cost him to use it. He looked across at Mulder, and his glance was met and held, before the Agent made his way back to the chair and sat back down, Krycek leant back and allowed the feeling of his lover’s nearness to sweep over him, it gave him strength.

"I will need names, dates and hard facts if I’m going to sell this to my superiors." Skinner said, calming somewhat when he saw that Krycek seemed willing to agree to testifying.

Krycek nodded, "I can give you that."

"My sister..." Scully began, then stopped as she swallowed hard, Krycek seeing the pain reflected upon her face hastened to answer.

"You caught the man who shot her, Dana... he paid for his crime, and.." he paused not sure if he what he wanted to say would help or not, in the end he decided to speak and let her make up her own mind. "It was an accident... Cardinal reacted..." he stopped seeing the raw pain in her face.

Scully felt the agony of her sister’s death raise up to swallow her, and she clutched at her pain and nursed it close to her heart, as she had for so long. Slowly Krycek words sank in and she felt rage flood her as she realised what he had said, standing she pounced, "You knew... you were there...you bastard, you were there and you didn’t stop it... you..." she leapt forward, and was upon the seated man before anyone could react.

Krycek curled instinctively trying to protect himself as she attacked, but she managed to get in a few hard punches before Mulder hauled her off. Unfortunately she had caught him a particularly nasty blow to his injured shoulder and the world tuned out while he tried to fight against the agony this caused.

When he was finally capable of opening his eyes he saw Mulder’s concerned face peering down at him, asking him frantically if he was all right. He swallowed against the bile that threatened to rise again, and pushed himself up, at this rate he was never going to be able to keep a meal down, Mulder hurried to assist him. Krycek could see Scully, she was not being held firmly in Skinner’s grip, but it was no longer necessary to hold her back from attacking him again. She was now curled into the taller man’s hold as she cried, the embrace was firm, and the look that Skinner was giving him was one of pure hatred.

"Alex." Mulder tried again, this time resting a hand under his lover’s chin and tilting the face back towards him, capturing his full attention as he asked, "Are you all right?"

Krycek pulled his head out of the grip and forcibly pushed the other man away as he struggled to his feet, he stood swaying for a few seconds before he moved past Mulder. He stopped a few feet away from the embracing couple and said, his own voice shaking with bitter emotions as he offered his testimony, "I tried to warn you... I called you... if you had been there when we arrived... Cardinal had orders to kill you... I didn’t know your sister was going to arrive... I would have stopped him if I could... but it happened so fast... there was nothing... NOTHING... that I could have done, but I would have... if I could." He tossed Mulder a look, seeing that his words had no affect on Scully, or her grief, he bit his lip and offered to his lover. "They are right Mulder... you’d be better off without me... I’m damned in hell, and anyone who touches me gets damned as well."

Then he was gone, the bedroom door closed firmly behind him, leaving the scene behind him as Alex tried to block out the hurt that was welling up inside. He had only wanted to comfort Scully, and yet she had attacked him. He had not thought his actions through, had thought that if he told her the truth, she would accept how sorry he felt for her sister death. But, once again, he had badly misjudged the situation, just like he had when he had first met Cancerman, had allowed the man to lure him into his first bite of the apple that was to ultimately lead to his disgrace.

He flung himself down on the bed, snarling at the pain from his injury, and feeling almost like punching it himself, just to see if physical pain could over ride his mental anguish. For a moment he wished that he could just walk out of the cabin, stroll along the pathway that skirted the edge of the lake. He desperately needed that freedom, and yet he knew that they would never allow him to leave. He sighed and reaching up he gently rubbed at his injury. Scully had landed a good punch, and it still throbbed bitterly.

As he lay there he began to realise that the last few days had been nothing more then a dream, an idyllic heavenly dream, which would eventually turn into the nightmare his life always became. Except this time he would drag Mulder down with him. It might even lead to the other man’s death, and that was something he was not prepared to allow, better that he end it now, before he saw the sweet expression of love turn to the same cast of hate that he had seen reflected in Skinner’s and Scully’s eyes.

"Krycek?" Mulder quietly questioned, opening the door and peering in. He noted the stony expression, and the way that Alex would not look at him as he spoke, his voice cold, dead.

"Tell Skinner I will testify to whatever he wants... then I want to go into the witness protection programme."

"No..." Mulder began moving further into the room. "We can’t..."

"No... Mulder." Krycek spat out, still refusing to meet his lover’s look. "We can’t... but I can, I don’t want this Mulder... I don’t want to be on the run for the rest of my life, looking over my shoulder... I want to... to be free of this, and..." he paused, trying desperately to think of the words that would drive the man he loved away from his side. "As long as you’re by my side, I will never be free..."

Mulder looked at the man lying on the bed, his face so determined and yet his eyes were those of a child who was giving away a beloved toy. Mulder could see that Krycek was fighting his own desire, and he wanted to shake the man, until he shook some sense into him. He glanced back over his shoulder and was glad that Skinner had taken Scully for a walk by the lake, to give her some time to come to terms with what she had learnt. Mulder knew that it would be hard for her, but she was a fair person, and whatever else Krycek might have done, he hadn’t needed to tell her the truth about her sister’s death. Yet, it had been the one burning fact that she had desperately been seeking, now she had the facts Mulder knew that she would someday sit down with Krycek and ask for more details, she would be calm, and prepared to listen to the full story.

"Scully will forgive you for being there," Mulder said calmly, moving further into the room. "After you came in here, she admitted to Skinner and me that she had received a phone call, no-one spoke, but it was enough to get her out of the apartment... was it you?" he asked.

Krycek slowly nodded, as he confessed, "I knew that she’d catch on, I hoped that she would, as I knew that I couldn’t allow Cardinal to kill her... I saw what her abduction did to you... and I couldn’t let you suffer that... I couldn’t..."

Mulder very carefully slipped onto the edge of the bed, just placing his weight upon it. Knowing that if he pushed, he would be rejected. "I know... and I also know that it took a lot of courage for you to tell her... and one day, she will be grateful that you did."

"Grateful!" Krycek barked out his tone bitter, "Grateful, I broke into her apartment, and then just stood by while her sister was killed, and you think she’ll be grateful... you know Mulder you really have been out there too long, if you think that." He raised himself, and made to move of the bed, unable to stay close to the man who he felt should hate him.

Mulder was not about to let him leave. He knew that once he did, he would never get Alex back, so he reached out and pulled his lover back roughly, wincing when he saw the look of pain that flashed across Krycek’s handsome features. He steeled himself and retorted, "Did you go there with the intention of killing Scully or her sister?" Not getting a reply from the stubborn man, he demanded again, "Did you?"

"You know I didn’t." Krycek finally said, his body still coiled, as if ready for flight.

"Then why did you go?" Mulder wanted desperately to take his lover in his arms and just hold him until all the pain he could feel emanating from him just faded away. The agony of his suffering was a palpable, "Why did you go there Alex?"

Krycek closed his eyes, as if he could hide from the pain that was coming from inside. "I’m not worth it Mulder... why can’t you just accept what everyone is trying to tell you?" He opened his eyes and looked pleadingly towards the man he loved, "Skinner is right... you can’t trust me Mulder... at the first sign of trouble I’ll betray you... you, and your friends, are you willing to take that risk?"

"Yes." Mulder answered, there was no doubt in his tone and it angered Krycek more then he could express so he reacted instead, as he pulled himself roughly out of the loosened grasp and pushed the other man roughly away from him.

"You’re as obsessed and crazy as they say you are... I’m no damn good Mulder... what is it going to take before you believe what’s being written directly under your nose... I was there when you father was killed, I was there when Scully’s sister was murdered... I beat the shit out of Skinner... and I enjoyed it." he added with a snarl, "And yet you can sit there and say that I’m worth loving... you’re fucking crazy man... fucking crazy."

Mulder barely prevented himself from falling off the bed from the shove that Krycek had given him, and he used the few seconds silence after Alex’s rant to gather his own emotions that threatened to burst their tightly held banks. If he lost his temper now, then he would lose Krycek as well. So he took a steadying breath and reined in his feelings as he fought to answer calmly. "If you don’t love me... then tell me that... don’t try to cover this over with what other people say and feel, I’m not interested in them Alex... it’s you I love... I don’t know why I feel the way I do... but I do love you... and if you want to call it an obsession, then fine, go ahead. Because I won’t lie and say that what I feel for you is anything less then love... If you want to walk away from us, then do so, but do it as a man. For god’s sake at least be honest about this, if not to me, then at least to yourself." He stopped, he could feel his own heart break as he said, "I can’t, won’t, hold you Krycek... you’re not some dumb animal that I can keep by lies. If you want to stay... to build on what we have, then I will stand by your side, no matter what.... But if you don’t love me, then say so... just look me in the eye and tell me that you don’t love me..." he looked up and dared the other man to meet his eyes.

Krycek stood frozen, as if incapable of movement as Mulder’s words spilled over him. All he had to do was look the other man in the eyes, and lie to him. It would be the biggest lie he’d ever told, and it would kill him to utter the words, but it would keep Mulder safe, keep him alive and surely that was worth any price he, Krycek, had to pay. He swallowed hard and lifted his eyes, they locked with Mulder’s hazel orbs. He opened his mouth, but no words came, his throat refused to obey him, he swallowed again and fought to get the words past his lips. Finally he gasped, as if it took the last of his air to do so. "I... I... don’t want you to die." He felt a single tear betray him as it slipped down his cheek and hated himself for this sign of weakness.

It was all that Mulder needed, he swiftly moved around the bed, and, pulling Krycek into his embrace, he said, "I can’t live without you... not now... it’s not an option... if you leave me, you might as well pull the trigger before you turn the light out.... Can’t you understand? I love you!"

Krycek sneaked an arm about his lover’s waist and, pulling the man closer to him, he whispered, "I love you too... God help us both."

Mulder tilted his head to look down at Krycek, then rested his lips against the other’s forehead he murmured, "He already has..." They stood like that for several minutes, as their emotions slowly calmed down, and the comfort they both desperately needed was given and shared.

Krycek moved uneasily in Mulder’s embrace, he pulled away a little and asked, "Skinner... Scully?"

"Skinner took Scully for a walk around the lake..." he stopped feeling Krycek tense under his hands. "She will understand... it was just the shock..." he added weakly.

"What happens now?" Krycek asked, not wanting to tread that pathway again.

"Now." Mulder began, appreciating the fact that Alex was still fighting his own demons where his father and Scully’s sisters death were concerned, he also knew that that particular battle was not yet over, but no matter what happened he was determined to win that war. "Now we both go to a safe house, while Skinner arranges for your testimony to be taken, and then we’ll go from there."

"A safe house," Krycek mused, pulling gently out of Mulder’s warm embrace and moving to look out the one window. He sighed and questioned, "And just how safe do you really expect that safe house to be?"

Mulder tilted his head back and looked up at the ceiling. He knew that they could kick that subject about for a long time, and still never reach a satisfactory conclusion. So, instead he answered, "We will be together, that was a stipulation of the agreement for your testimony, then after you’ve testified we can either both go into the Witness Protection programme." He held up his hand, as Krycek swung towards him, his mouth open to protest. "It’s an option that we might have to consider... and we should not just dismiss it... the alternative is that you are granted immunity against prosecution, which will be a stipulation anyway, but it will allow you to remain with me after the trial if you so wish... I could always be reassigned..."

"Reassigned... where to? Alaska would still be too near..." Krycek offered, a slight frown crossing his handsome face as he considered this options.

"But they do have six month nights up there, so don’t knock it."

"In bed with you for six months..." Krycek smiled, it was the first simile he’d given in hours, "They won’t have to send a killer after me, you’d do that within the first two months."

"Hey..." Mulder objected, moving over and taking Krycek in another embrace which allowed him to tenderly deposit a kiss upon the willing lips, "I’d let you up for sustenance."

"And here I thought I’d been surviving on some other sort of sustenance!" Krycek replied, a warm smile slipping across the supple lips as another kiss was requested and freely given.

"Believe me Alex, keeping you healthy is in my own interest." Mulder run his hands up under the other man’s jumper, enjoying the feeling of warm flesh that lay under his seeking hands. He sighed, and gently pulled away as he heard the cabin door opened and close. "Now, I think we’d better go out there and make plans for our future." As he moved away, he reached back and took Krycek hand in his own firm grasp.

Krycek allowed Mulder to move away, and take his hand, but he lagged back, still unsure of the reception he would receive from the other two people who awaited them in the next room. Skinner he knew hated him, he’d seen the look even if Mulder hadn’t and now Scully had even more reason not to trust him, and if anything, now considered him to be an accomplice to her sister’s murder.

Mulder, sensing what Krycek was thinking, looked back and tilted his head saying, "Together." He lifted their clasped hands and added, "No matter what... together."

"Together." Krycek agreed, smiling weakly as he allowed his lover to lead him into the other room.

=-=-=-=-=

Skinner and Scully were waiting for them as they entered living room. Skinner looked up from his conversation on his mobile phone, nodded once in greeting, then returned to his quiet discussion.

Scully was standing over by the sink, a fresh cup of coffee in her hand, she noted their arrival and held up the coffee-pot. It looked as if it had recently been filled. Mulder shot Krycek a look and could tell that the man desperately needed that drink, but he could also see that Alex was not going to start any conversations with Scully, or even get near her for fear of upsetting her again.

"We’ll both have a cup." Mulder said, refusing to let go of Krycek’s hand as he made his way over to his partner.

Without a word she retrieved two cups and poured their coffee, then she handed then over. Krycek’s hand shook slightly at he hesitatingly accepted his.

Scully saw this and pressed her lips together. She felt bad about the way she had attacked the man. It was very unprofessional, and no matter what else Krycek might have done, he had saved Mulder’s life and as much as she didn’t want to admit it, she also believed that he would have saved her sister’s life, if it had been possible. "Krycek.." she began, then paused and said instead, "Alex... I’m sorry about my behaviour earlier... it was just the shock... finding out that you were there when..." she paused again, unable to say the words.

Krycek seeing how hard the apology was for Scully hurried to put her fears at rest as he interrupted saying, "No... the fault was mine, I... I just never thought... only I wanted you to know what really happened... you deserve to know..." he finished lamely, still afraid of saying something wrong.

The silence was tense until Scully forced a little smile to her lips and offered, "I would like to know.. what exactly happened... but not now... maybe later.. once things have settled down a bit."

Krycek swallowed, looked away then back at her as he nodded and agreed, "Any time."

Skinner slid his mobile phone closed and approached the three people by the kitchen bench. "I’ve made arrangements for you to be placed in a safe house Krycek."

"I will be with him." Mulder stated firmly.

"You will be the lead FBI agent on site." Skinner confirmed, just as firmly stressing the lead agent part. He was informing Mulder that there was to be no intimacy during the period at the safe house. It was to be kept professional. Mulder nodded, accepting the fact. Seeing the agreement in the agent’s eyes Skinner continued, "I will assign four other agents, including Scully. But it is not an FBI safe house....I thought it might be better not to use one of ours, so I’ve er... managed to borrow from a friend... Krycek." He shot the young man in question a hard look, preventing Mulder from asking the question he could see resting on his lips, "Will give a taped deposition, which I will put before a judge, either this afternoon or tomorrow. If we get the all clear then it will be taken further."

Krycek bit at his bottom lip then asked, "So what exactly do you want me to tell you?"

Skinner considered his words, knowing that any information he got from Krycek would be selective, the man was nothing if not cautious, and he would only give what he had to. "Why not start with your first involvement with the man we now call Cancerman, how he recruited you, what he told you your objectives were and we can work from there."

Silence ruled for a few seconds why each person considered the proposal. Finally Krycek nodded slowly and agreed, "Alright... do you want me to do it here or at the safe house?"

"I’ve arranged for you to go to the safe house directly from here," he glanced at his watch, "We will, of course, accompany you. The proper equipment will be waiting for use there to take your statement formally, so it would be best if we started from the beginning there, rather than here."

"So, you want us to leave now?" Mulder asked, not sure if he liked the feeling of being rushed that he was getting. "And who exactly have you borrowed this safe house from?

"The sooner the statement is taken, the quicker we can get it processed and passed down the line. Also, once his statement is has been signed and lodged with the proper authorities, at least Krycek will have some semblance of protection. "

"So in other words, if Cancerman takes me out, at least you’ll have got something for your efforts," Krycek put in sarcastically.

Skinner tilted his head and glared at Krycek before retorting, "This is your choice Krycek, no one on this side is putting a gun to your head, and you know that this is your best chance of surviving."

Alex took a deep breath to steady the flare of anger, then let it out slowly, accepting the truth of Skinner’s words. He was not being forced into giving his statement, but if he wanted any resemblance of a normal life, or any chance of spending it with Mulder, then giving his statement, and seeing if he survived, was the price he was going to have to pay. "Alright." He said, his tone indicating that he did not like his options. "I suggest that we get going then." As he spoke he made his way back to the bedroom, intending to pack the few belongings that Mulder had brought for him.

"Alex," Mulder said, reaching out to lay a hand on the other’s arm, preventing him from leaving. "I want to know exactly where this safe house is first.. and just how safe it really is." He left the part statement, part question hanging as he looked towards his superior.

The AD bristled under the look and snapped, "It’s a safe house Mulder, sanctioned and kept by the CIA."

"CIA?" Scully exclaimed, her face reflecting her surprise.

"Yes," Skinner looked sheepish, "I don’t entirely trust our ability to maintain a safe house for Krycek, so I’ve called in a few favours from some friends. Also, the other agents on site have been hand picked by myself, because I know that I can trust them, and yes, they will be CIA operatives. I consider that keeping the FBI out of this would be wiser, at least until after we have Krycek’s testimony down on tape and laid before a judge."

Mulder looked down, suddenly unable to meet his superior’s look as he realised that he had dared to question his trust. Then he looked up, his glance defiant. Where Krycek’s safety was concerned, he would push the matter all the way. Skinner, inwardly acknowledging the cause of Mulder’s unease, relented slightly and offered, "While Alex and I may have some unresolved issues going Mulder, I would never do anything to intentionally endanger his life, and more importantly, nor would I endanger any agent under my supervision."

"I know sir." Mulder offered, with a slight smile of apology, "And I’m sorry for doubting you."

The tension that had grown up between them for a few moments began to ebb as Scully moved towards the chair where her discarded jacket lay. She picked it up and asked, "So, shall we get this little venture on the road or what?"

=-=-=-=-=

The actual trip to the safe house was uneventful. The cabin was packed up and deserted in a relatively short period of time. After replacing the missing part to Mulder’s borrowed truck, they left the cabin behind them. Skinner took the lead in his car, with Scully sitting beside him. Mulder drove the larger 4X4 and Alex sat beside him. Neither man spoke much on the journey, each engrossed by their own thoughts.

Scully looked over towards her boss and bit her bottom lip, she wanted to talk to him about what had happened at the cabin, between her partner and Krycek, but she was unsure about raising the subject. Skinner had been silent ever since they had closed up the cabin, obviously deep in thought. His only comment had been to commend Mulder on his ability to disable the other vehicle, Mulder had just smiled and mumbled something about the interesting things you learn in the course of FBI training.

Scully herself was not sure how to handle the matter, while one part of her wanted to slap Krycek again, and berate him for the pain she believed that he had caused her, another part desperately wanted him to be the one that Mulder could truly love. She knew that her partner was a very lonely man, who did not make friends easily, and while she knew that she had some unresolved issues with the man he had apparently chosen as his life mate, she could only be pleased that he was, for now, happy. Even as this thought entered her head, she made herself another solemn promise that if Krycek ever upset, left, or destroyed her partner, there would never be a rock small enough for him to hide under and no amount of past experience would enable him in hiding from her wrath. Only time would tell is the words he had spoken in the cabin were true, if he really did love Mulder as much as he claimed, then she would be there to witness it. She was prepared to give him that time only because of her own regard for her partner and friend.

Skinner meanwhile kept his eyes firmly on the road in front of them. The track was tricky and the trees looming high above them. Once they hit the main road he felt a lot better and sat back, seeking a more comfortable driving position. He had made all the arrangements necessary for keeping Krycek safe. While it galled him to do anything for the younger man, he had to admit that he trusted Mulder more then he did any other of his agents, and the man seems sincere in his affection for the double agent. Although Skinner still had his own doubts, Krycek had agreed to testify against his previous masters and supply Mulder and the FBI with some very important information. He was a complete professional. So he would do his duty, and do his best to kept the son of a bitch in the car behind alive for as long as necessary. He would also ensure that the man didn’t lose Skinner his best agent if he did decided to turn coats once more. If Krycek stepped out of line just once, then AD Skinner would be there to slap him back down under the rock that he had crawled from, and this time the granite would be his tombstone.

Several hours passed before they pulled up at the gates of a rather large house that sat in it’s own grounds, the high walls looked impressive and noting the camera that sat nestled on the turret style pillar next to the gate, Mulder felt himself relaxing slightly. The gates swung open noiselessly and they pulled into the long drive that led up to the house.

Krycek was unable to prevent the small sound that escaped his lips, and Mulder, glancing over at him, saw a shadowed, haunted look on his face. Reaching out he lightly clasped the clenched hands, saying as he did so, "Together."

Krycek returned his look gratefully and held on to the hand for a few seconds before replying, "Together."

As they pulled up just outside the main door to the large, impressive house, Skinner moved forward to greet the man who had opened the door and was waiting for him. Neither Krycek nor Mulder could hear what they said, but both were slightly concerned by the looks that were being cast in their direction by each man.

Mulder felt his anger stir and giving Krycek a reassuring glance, he turned and marched up to his superior. Skinner threw him a frown as he approached and then continued, a change in topic obvious to both men, "This is Agent Mulder, he will be the lead FBI agent on this case, and will be in charge of things from our side." Then turning to Mulder he offered, "This is Mark Beasent, he is in charge of the security for this property, and Mulder, he knows what his talking about, so I would take his advice very seriously."

Mulder considered Skinner’s words, then nodded slowly, "I will take any advice that is given on behalf of Krycek’s safety very seriously, sir." His tone indicating that his primarily interest was his lover’s safety.

Skinner looked as if he wanted to say more, but then glancing at his watch he said instead, "I’ve got an appointment with Judge Pringle... and I don’t want to be late... Mark will answer any questions that you might have, and while I’m gone, you can get started on Krycek’s statement." As he finished speaking he headed back towards his own car.

Scully had stepped out of the vehicle when she saw Mulder approach Skinner, but she had made no move to join the other three men, instead she had used the time to study Krycek who had remained in the other car. If the ex-Agent felt her appraisal he gave no indication as he continued the watch the scene that was being played out in front of him.

"Alex." Mulder called, as Skinner pulled away along the drive moving slowly away from the house. Krycek climbed out of the large truck and headed over towards Mulder. Scully didn’t need to be called, and he introduced her as she came to a halt beside her partner. "This is Agent Mark Beasent, he is in charge of the security of this place." As he finished speaking he turned towards the man in question and raised an eyebrow, as if asking ‘what now’.

Mark, seeing this as his cue, smiled broadly and offered his hand to each of them in turn, saying as he did so, "Walter was a bit secretive about what you guys were up to. But, we owe him a favour of two, so this place is yours.... At least for the next few days," He added as he moved back towards the door that led into the house.

Nobody asked him who the ‘we’ were, who owed Skinner the favours, nor what event was happening in few days that would require the house. "This is the main hallway." Mark continued as he led the other three from the bright sunlight in the cool shaded area of the hallway. "I understand that Mr Krycek is the witness, so he will be placed in the basement..."

"The basement?" Scully asked before she could stop herself, turning to look at Krycek who had paled at the announcement.

"The basement is the safest part of the house, it’s reinforced and has an escape hatch, with a tunnel to another part of the estate... it’s also easily defensible and," Mark offered with a wide smile, "No-one expects the witness to be placed underground, it is completely self-contained. The bedroom has an en-suite bathroom, there’s also kitchen, sitting room etc.. the works," he sounded quite proud of the building, and Mulder wondered at that, as Beasent finished, "Even all the recording equipment is down there..."

"I’m not going underground," Krycek stated rather loudly, his eyes wide with remembered fear, and looking at Mulder he shook his head firmly.

"Listen... Skinner said that you were in a pretty desperate situation," Mark had centred his full attention directly on Krycek, "He also said that you were on your own if you didn’t like the arrangements..." the threat was left unspoken, but all could hear it clearly.

"Fine," Krycek snarled starting to turn away, but his arm was caught and held by Mulder before he could complete the move.

"Krycek," he began, paused for a moment, then continued, "Alex, I will be with you... I promise you that you will not be left alone."

Krycek turned beseeching eyes upon his lover as he stated, "Mulder... I can’t.... you know I can’t... please... don’t make me..."

Mulder felt a flash of annoyance at Krycek’s words, and the guilt he was feeling at making his lover face his fears in this manner, and retorted with more anger then he intended, "Alex, what the hell do you want from us? This is as safe as we can get you, and you’re throwing a hissy fit ‘cause you’ve got to go sleep in the basement?"

Krycek felt the words hit home, and he straightened at the harsh words. Swallowing hard he pushed back the feeling of hurt and fell easily into the relaxed stance that had assisted him so much in the past. "I have my reasons for not wanting to die in a basement, and I don’t have any reason to particularly trust any of you," he added, emphasising the word trust in his speech. Seeing the barb hit home, he felt a cold smile of satisfaction sweep across his face as he continued, "So I will want to check out exactly what is available to me, as far as an escape route is concerned." Seeing the negative look that entered Beasant’s features he added, "This is not open to debate, if I’m not happy with your arrangements concerning my safety... then I am out of here." He held his head high and glared at the other three people who were looking at him with varying degrees of shock and anger. He chose to ignore two of them as he raised an eyebrow at Mulder.

The FBI Agent could see the truth behind Krycek’s words. Sighing in defeat, knowing that his harsh words had hurt his lover, and that he more then likely deserved the anger he could feel radiating from him, he turned back to Beasent. "Mr Krycek does have a point. I would also be interested in seeing exactly what kind of security you have to offer him."

Mark Beasent sensed that there was more going on between the two men than either were letting on. He shot a look towards the other member of their party, but she was more interested in glaring at the man they were assigned to protect, so he sighed and holding out a hand he indicated the door that lead to the basement.

The steps were narrow with a rail down either side. As Mulder descended he had to agree with Beasent, the step could be easily defended if the need arose. On reaching the bottom he turned slightly to assist Krycek down the last few steps, as he was now wearing a sling to support his injured arm and movement was awkward. They were now faced with a large, bullet proof, door. Beyond that the hallway widened out, about half-way along, sitting behind a large desk was a man, who looked up, nodded towards Beasent before turning his attention back to the four small TV screens in front of him. After passing the desk the hallway narrowed again. As they stood behind his colleague, Mark explained, "These four TV screens cover the surrounding area outside the house, you can see the main gate there." He pointed to the screen in question before continuing, "If an attempt is made, then the doors down here are locked and it’s up to us upstairs to prevent any penetration down here."

Mulder threw Krycek a quick glance when he heard a slight snicker, and could tell from his expression just what he was thinking at the terminology of penetration. Krycek seeing the look just raised an eyebrow and smiled innocently. While Mulder would have been annoyed if this had happened a week ago, this time he found himself returning the smile and also felt himself growing hot at the thought of Krycek’s body under his own. He swallowed hard and pulled his concentration back to what Beasent was saying as they passed through another large iron door, that looked as if it would be impossible breach once it was locked.

"This is the main bedroom." Beasent said, reaching pass Mulder and opening the door, it lead into a large room with a bed at one end, it was a double, and off to once side Mulder could see another door and just beyond that the indications of a bathroom. "Mr Krycek, this will be your room, you will be expected to remain down here during the remainder of your stay."

"I don’t like enclosed spaces," Krycek began, his tone once more belligerent but Mulder held up a hand saying.

"I know Alex, but it will only be for a few days, and I promise... I will be with you."

Krycek looked as if he wanted to argue the point, but seeing the harsh looks he was getting from the others, he looked away, not happy with the situation, but knowing that he was not going to win an argument with Mulder if he decided to push it.

"You will be very comfortable here Mr Krycek," Beasent continued, closing the door and indicating another one, "This is the kitchen, but most of your food will be prepared upstairs and then shipped down, and this," he opened another door, "Is the main interrogation... er I mean... interview room." He moved into it, and revealed another comfortable looking room, with three chairs and a large table, on which stood some very expensive audio equipment. Seeing the shuttered look that crossed Krycek’s face at his words, Beasent backed down and offered instead, "So, how about we all have something to drink, maybe eat and then we can discuss the security arrangements in more detail and the working roster."

Mulder spoke up, "I will be with Alex for the entire length of his stay here." It was not a suggestion, but a statement of fact, and Beasent could tell from the look in the other agent’s eyes that he was not going to be pushed on this point.

"All right, but there is only one bedroom down here Agent Mulder... You might end up sleeping on the floor," he cautioned. Then, seeing the look Krycek threw Mulder, he coughed to cover his surprise, then continued, "I will let the others know, but we do tend to be a pretty close knit bunch, so the same operatives will be working the main house, and the surrounding area, for the duration as well. This is a 24/7 secure facility... you should feel honoured Mr Krycek."

"I’ll let you know how honoured I feel, if I make it out of here alive." Snapped Krycek still not happy with the arrangements, or the lack of support he’d got from his lover over the issue. "Now you said something about an escape hatch... where?" As he spoke Krycek looked further down the hall, as if expecting to see it.

Beasent again looked uncomfortable, "That’s usually privileged information Mr Krycek."

"Fine, I’m out of here..." Krycek span about and was further down the hall, by the time Mulder spoke.

"Alex..." his tone stopped the other man, but he didn’t turn back, merely paused, waiting. "Just tell him where the damn escape hatch is Beasent... or do you want explain to Skinner exactly why our only witness did a runner.."

"It’s in the bedroom, here I’ll show you, but the corridor is covered by our video equipment and some nasty little traps, so I would advise that you don’t enter it unless specifically instructed to do so."

Krycek had spun about and glared at the man who had spoken before snarling, "I wasn’t planning on making out in the damn tunnel, I just want to know where it is.... So show me."

Beasent did as instructed. Entering the bedroom, he moved towards the dressing table and, after twisting one of its finely carved legs, he easily pulled it away from the wall. There, sitting behind it, was the dark entrance to a tunnel. "It leads out to a gazebo, near to north wall, there are also some garages out that way." As he spoke he closed the door and twisted the leg back. "Satisfied?" he asked, his tone slightly sarcastic.

Krycek ignored him. "This is my bedroom?" he asked wanting it clarified. When Beasent nodded he moved towards the door, opening for them to leave, he stated firmly, "I’m going to get cleaned up... alone." The last word was directed at Mulder who had made no attempt to follow the others from the room. The Agent raised an eyebrow, then wandered towards the door, on reaching it he threw, Scully and Beasent a look which firmly stated ‘don’t ask’, then he closed the door on them.

Beasent watched the by-play and didn’t say a word, Scully just watched him until he finally gave in and said weakly, "The er.. kitchen has a sitting room attached, shall we go and make ourselves comfortable."

"Let’s," Scully agreed, moving past the taller man. She could tell that Beasent was dying to ask questions, but she also knew that he was too much of a professional to do so.

=-=-=-=-=

Krycek span around when he realised that Mulder was closing the door, but leaving himself still in the room, and snapped, "Do you have trouble with the word alone, Mulder?"

Mulder didn’t answer, just firmly closed the door behind him, then without a word he moved towards his lover and pulled him into a firm embrace. Krycek fought the arms that came about him for a few seconds, then melted into the warmth that they offered.

"You know I hate being underground Mulder." He hissed, his anger still tangible.

"I know, but I hate the thought of you being dead even more...." Mulder mumbled back, his hands gently rubbing up and down the tensed back under his fingers. "It’s just for a few days Alex... until we can get this matter sorted, and we’ve decided what we are going to do."

"I thought that it had already been decided," Krycek retorted, still miffed, but mellowing under the smoothing hands of his lover.

Mulder didn’t answer right away and Alex began to move with unease, until Mulder confessed. "A lot depends on what’s in your statement, and how the judge accepts it. Then Skinner has to sell it on, and see what we can get out of it."

"You know that I won’t live long enough to testify don’t you?" It was a simple statement of fact that tore into Mulder’s gut. "But, it’s worth it just to have these few days together," Krycek went on, moving his own hands so that they made contact with Mulder’s flesh, sweeping up to gently delve under the jacket and shirt. "I’d willingly die, if it could be in your arms." He whispered, lifting his lips and laying gentle, nip kisses along the neck of his lover, just under the jaw line.

Mulder wanted to push Krycek away and state firmly that he was not going to die, that they were going to have a life together and that he was talking nonsense, but he was wise enough to know that he was not in a position to guarantee that. However, he did feel that he could promise Krycek something, "Together Alex, if we go, it’s together." He tilted his head to allow his lover better access, and Alex eagerly took advantage of the extra flesh that had been allowed him.

"Let’s fuck," he murmured, his words dirty and causing the blood to rush through both men, but Mulder groaned and pushed himself back saying.

"Can’t... not now...." He held Alex at arms length, saw the light in the other’s eyes and the way that he licked his full lips and groaned again saying, "I need a shower." He meant a cold one, but Krycek picked up on the words and immediately began to undress Mulder saying.

"That is a great idea." As he did so he pulled his lover over towards the bathroom, and soon, both men were standing naked under the shower, engaged in a possessive, explosive game of sex. Mulder’s promise to Skinner forgotten under the heated lips of his talented lover.

=-=-=-=-=

Krycek sat in the interview room and looked about, boredom clearly etched on his handsome features. They had been in there for over twenty minutes and Beasent was still searching for a clean tape to use. The CIA agent looked acutely embarrassed as he shrugged and moved out of the room, still intent on his search.

"Don’t say a word," Mulder snarled, his eyes belying his harsh tone and words. They had been in the safe house for a little over six hours, and two of those had been spent in the shower. While he had enjoyed the shower immensely, he had known that it was only a matter of time before Beasent informed Skinner of the break in protocol.

"How about if we just do this the old fashioned way... I speak and you write it all down, do you think those CIA guys can write?" Alex offered, a wicked smile playing about his features.

"Krycek," Mulder snarled, kicking the man under the table and watching with some satisfaction as he yelped and leant down to rub his injured leg, before Mulder offered out loud, trying to build bridges by deflecting the other’s words, "Yeah, Alex... I can just see the defence lawyer taking that one apart... No let’s wait for the tape... Beasent is sure to have a box full of them somewhere." He motioned with his eyes to the one way mirror positioned at one end of the room, it was obvious what he was trying to say. They could be being watched.

Krycek rolled his eyes and stood up, moving further away from Mulder and his long legs, "We could give them something to watch," he suggested, then seeing the look this earned him he sighed again and asked, "When is Skinner due back?" Seeing his lover’s apologetic look, Krycek shrugged quite willing to forgive his lover and moved back across the room to stand near to Mulder.

"I’m not sure, he had a few people to see, but he did call Scully back to the office, so hopefully it will be later on tonight."

"Tonight?" Krycek questioned glancing at his watch, it was nearly midnight now. "This is a stupid time to take a statement," he grumbled for the tenth time.

"Skinner wants it on tape as soon as possible," Mulder stated again. He remembered the telephone conversation that had taken place between himself and his boss earlier.

"Yeah, I bet he does... then if anything happens to me... well at least he’s got it on tape."

"Alex," Mulder began but his ex-partner held up his hand and waved the rest of the words aside.

"I know.. I know... but I don’t think he’s ever going to volunteer to be best man at our wedding."

Mulder felt a sudden jolt of surprise and gasped at the other’s words before he grinned widely and said, "My this is so sudden, you’ve not even asked me yet."

Krycek seeing the look in his lovers eyes just rolled his own and replied, "It was a figure of speech...Mulder."

Mulder battered his eyelashes and complained, "And here I thought you were going to make an honest man of me."

Krycek let out a bark of laughter and retorted, "And here I thought I was the one who needed to be made honest."

Mulder opened his mouth to commented again, but snapped it shut when the door burst open and Beasent strolled into the room hold a couple of tapes high in the air. "Found them," he said by way of greeting.

The next few hours passed with Krycek giving his statement. He tried to keep it as honest as possible, and it was the naked truth. He told about how he’d first been approached by the man, now known as Cancerman, how he had begun working as Mulder’s partner and the events that had followed, giving only details of missions that he himself had been involved in.

"That’s enough," Mulder suddenly stated, reaching over and turning the tape machine off. "It’s three-twenty five am, end of first statement interview."

"But..." Beasent began, then fell silence under the glare this earned him.

"Alex is tired. No, he is exhausted, and he’s still recovering from being shot... I think that’s enough for tonight, we can continue this tomorrow once he’s rested." As he spoke he looked over at his lover’s tired and drawn features. "Come on Alex," he continued, reaching out and helping the other man to stand.

Krycek swayed and blinked owlishly several times before he realised that he had in fact risen. Mulder reached an arm about his waist and supported him for a few seconds until Krycek nodded that he was all right.

"Is he all right?" Beasent asked, seeing the pale, drawn features for the first time. He had been so intent on the statement that he had not noticed the condition of the man giving it.

"Yeah... but it’s been a long week, so just cut us some slack here," Mulder said, still staying close to Krycek as the other man edged around the table and headed out of the room. "Give us a wake up call at about ten-ish." He asked, not looking back and not really caring if Beasent disagreed with the fact that Mulder was going to sleep in Krycek’s bedroom.

"Sure... no problem," Beasent said, sounding slightly distracted.

"Here let me help," Mulder said, moving to Krycek’s assistance. As soon as the bedroom door had shut behind them, Alex had began to strip off his clothes, leaving a trail, as he headed towards the bathroom. Once finished in there, he moved naked towards the bed and crawled under the covers.

"Man this is hard," he mumbled as Mulder climbed on top of the covers still fully dressed. He pulled Krycek into a warm embrace that had the other man lying slightly on top of him.

"I know babe," Mulder replied, looking down at the dark haired head that rested on his chest. Reaching out he gently played with the hair until the other man slipped into a deep slumber. As the night wore on, Mulder considered their options. He was not happy with Scully being called away, nor the delay in Skinner returning. He knew that he could trust both his partner and his boss, and yet, with Krycek’s very life in the balance and the sure knowledge that the Cancerman would waste no time in killing his lover, he felt unease.

"You worry to much," Krycek suddenly spoke up and Mulder glanced down at the head still resting on his chest.

"I thought you were asleep," he said, still toying with the silken stands of hair.

"I dozed, but I can hear your brain working from here.... What’s wrong?"

"What’s wrong?" Mulder laughed. "You mean beside the fact that someone tried to kill me, shot you and now you are preparing to testify against Cancerman?"

Krycek sighed and moved his head on the broad chest of his lover. "Mulder... we both knew this wasn’t going to be easy.... Hell, being in this room, underground, is giving me the chills. But, like you said, it’s something we’ve got to do to get to the end, and the end is, if we are lucky, that we will be together... it’s what I want and," he paused while he considered his words carefully. "It’s worth the risk of dying for."

"I love you." Mulder said the words quietly, but it reverberated like the loudest sound in the room.

"I know," Krycek replied after a long pause, "I love you too."

"Why?"

"Excuse me?" Krycek asked in some surprise, leaning slightly back to look up at Mulder, who wore a frown across his handsome face.

"Why do you love me.. and when did you first realise that you loved me?"

Krycek relaxed back onto the comfortable chest and allowed the deep breathing of the other man to wash over him. "Why do I love you..." he began, this was an area where he felt comfortable, he had loved Mulder for so long, it was as much a part of him as breathing. "Honestly... I can’t say... I don’t know.. I just know that I do..." He stopped again, unsure how to put such a feeling of certainly into words.

"When... when did you know that you loved me?"

Krycek had to laugh at the words, Mulder was forever curious and it would appear to also be the case here. Alex closed his eyes and thought back, when he had realised that he loved the other man. Slowly the eyes opened and he said, "During our first case..."

"Our first case?" The surprise was evident in Mulder eyes, as well as the pleasure.

"I told you then, I’d admired you for quite a while, and I did believe in what you were doing." As he finished he pulled a sour face and continued, "That’s what that bastard used against me... but that’s beside the point, you wanted to know when I first realised that I loved you.... Well, I don’t think it was a bolt of lighting or anything like that, it just kinda sneaked up on me."

Mulder shifted slightly and said, sounding slightly smug. "Yeah, I have a habit of doing that to people."

"Yeah, well from now on pal the only person you’re going to sneak up on in bed is me," Krycek said firmly, his tone not quite as joking as it could have been.

"Oh?" Mulder said tightening his arms about his lover. "I didn’t know you were so possessive."

"Yes you do, and believe me, Mulder I don’t hesitate to fight to keep what’s mine."

"Me too... Krycek me too... now come on answer up, when did you realise that I was the one for you."

"Oh please pass me a bucket... you sound like a cheap dime store novel..." Krycek waited a few seconds to see if Mulder was going to answer, but when he didn’t he turned his thoughts back to the conversation at hand. "If I had to put it down to one moment in time... it would be when we had just caught up with Cole, in the freight warehouse... when he made me believe that he had a gun on you, and I... I shot him... I knew then that I could not let him kill you... I guess I realised just how... how important you had suddenly become to me.. but it wasn’t... it wasn’t until later... at Skyland Mountain, when you tried to climb off that cable car that I realised just how much you had come to mean to me." Silence slipped over the room, each man caught in their own memory.

"It was in the warehouse." Mulder said, then seeing the confused look that Krycek tossed his way he explained, "Where you got shot... it was then that I realised that I loved you... it was quite a nasty surprise, me sitting there holding you in my arms, you bleeding all over me, my worse enemy.... I thought that I hated you, but then I realised that there really is only a thin line between love and hate, and that the reason why I kept touching, and hitting you was because I could not keep my hands off you...." He let out a small bark of laughter as he run his hands up and down the quiescent body under his hands.

Krycek did not look impressed as he commented, "Gee and I thought it was my mind you were after."

"Your mind!" Mulder exclaimed, "I love your mind." He leant down and kissed the head, then tilted the face up towards him, "Your nose," he touched his lips to the object, "your eyes," a brief brush of lips, "and your mouth... especially your mouth." The kiss was long and lingering, and when they parted Krycek whispered, his voice husky.

"I thought Skinner made you lead agent so that you wouldn’t jump into bed with me."

Mulder pulled a face at his lovers words, and moved back slightly as he defended himself, "That’s why I’m this side of the blankets and you’re under them, that’s why I’m still dressed and you’re..." he swallowed hard, "and you’re buck naked under that sheet."

Seeing the gleam that entered Mulder’s eyes and the shortening of breath, Krycek smiled warmly and offered, "I won’t tell Skinner if you don’t." Whatever else he might have said was cut short by the harsh mouth that descended upon his own. Words suddenly became unimportant as the hands that had gently played with his hair, suddenly began to explore other more important areas.

The next few hours passed in intense loving, neither man willing to voice, but each very much aware that they might not have much time. This gave their lovemaking an intensity that left them breathing hard and their bodies slick with sweat..

=-=-=-=

A light knock on the door had a naked Mulder out of the bed and reaching for the handle before it could open. He tossed a look back at the still sleeping Krycek and opening the door a crack he demanded, "What?"

Beasent swallowed hard and looked at the body of Mulder that he could see, mainly the upper shoulder and arm, with the curve of the neck. He was obviously naked, and obviously very handsome in that state. "Er... Skinner just called, he’s on his way over... I er.." he paused then shrugged as he offered, "I thought that you might like to know... before he gets here."

Mulder smiled his thanks brightly and asked, "Any breakfast left?"

"Yeah, sure... I’ll put a new pot of coffee on."

By the time Skinner arrived, both Mulder and Krycek were up, dressed, and eating breakfast. The AD looked at the two men, then threw Beasent a hard look, the man under his gaze just smiled and shrugged, offering his own cup up, asking if Skinner wanted one.

"I saw Judge Pringle yesterday, she is not prepared to make a move unless she speaks to you directly Krycek."

"What about the taped statement?" Mulder asked, not taking his eyes of his boss.

"No... she is insisting on talking to Krycek direct... and," Skinner said about a frown, "I can’t say that I blame her, considering she was the only one who was even remotely interested in hearing what I had to say in the first place." He paused and let his words hang.

"What exactly does that mean?" Krycek asked, "Will she come here, or am I to go to her."

Skinner looked decidedly uncomfortable as he informed the other men, "We’ve got an appointment in her chambers this afternoon, after court."

"In court!" Mulder exclaimed, his tone clearly indicating that he was not happy. "So we just waltz right in, what will Krycek wear? A brown paper bag over his head?"

"That was very helpful Agent Mulder." Skinner snapped, before he carried on, satisfied with the shamefaced look that his agent threw him, "I don’t like it any more then you do, but that is the bottom line. If we want her help, then we are going to have to play by her rules."

"I think that Mr Skinner is right," Krycek suddenly put in, "I mean, we are going after some pretty heavy people, and to be honest I don’t blame this judge for wanting to check me out before she signs any forms."

"I’m not happy with this either Mulder," Skinner confided, "And I was in her chambers until after one this morning trying to change her mind, but she was adamant... no Krycek... no help."

Krycek could see the tension that now existed between Skinner and his lover.

He was acutely aware that he was the reason for it, and it saddened him. He knew that Mulder had always had a fairly good relationship with boss, and he realised that if anything happened to him, then it would be to Scully and Skinner that Mulder would turn, and he wanted them to remain friends. "Hey, no problem... we’ll just pop into the court house and see her, I’ll tell her what she wants to know. We will get our signed bits of paper, and then we can go forward and talk about the witness protection programme."

Silence reigned for several minuets while each man digested what Krycek had just said, until finally Skinner nodded and offered, "If that’s what you want."

"What I want is to have never got myself into this position in the first place." Krycek suddenly looked unsure, as if he’d give too much away.

"It’s alright Alex," Mulder said reaching over the gently touching the slightly shaking hand.

"I think it might be best if we continue taking your statement Alex." Beasent said speaking for the first time, "That way, once you see the Judge we can move you on to somewhere different."

"Somewhere different?" Mulder suddenly questioned, turning to look at the other man.

"Look," Beasent began, "Walter and I go way back." He looked towards the man in question, who smiled slightly and nodded in agreement. It was a good, deep friendship that had stood the trials of time, it had been forged in war and continued in peacetime. "And well, when he called and said that he needed a favour, I was more the willing to help. But, even I can see that whatever this is, it’s goes pretty deep. Deeper than perhaps I need to know, but one thing I am sure about, and that is that you," he pointed towards Krycek, "Need all the help you can get and you," he pointed towards Mulder, "Are in this just as deep as he is. Now, I’m just thinking that the best protection that you both can have, is the knowledge you carry in your head Krycek. So, the sooner we can get it down on tape, and signed as a statement, then the sooner we can duplicate it, get it distributed, and hidden away, so that you can use it as a weapon."

"As a weapon?" Mulder queried, slightly surprised to be getting support from this unexpected quarter.

"A weapon." Beasent agreed, "Now I know some people in the computer industry who might be able to help us, but Walter here told me that you have a little group of your own that you like to use?"

"Yes," Mulder said, still slightly confused, "They call themselves the Lone

Gunmen,"

"And are they good?" Mark Beasent threw Skinner a look, and saw the other man nod in agreement before he said.

"They are the best."

"So, get the statement down, along with anything else that you can think of using as a weapon, and Krycek... you have to think of it as a weapon, it’s the only was to get the attention of the people who are after you, and then get these, er... Lone Gunmen to duplicate it, and then post it via the net to every single paper in the world, with the proviso that if you don’t enter a password each and every day, week, month... whatever, then the information will be released to the press world wide."

"Just who the hell are you?" Mulder suddenly asked, standing up and slightly in front of Krycek as if to shield him from the other man.

Beasent, seeing the action, looked down, then up again, saying with determination, "Agent Mulder, I am not your enemy, but I know enough about the shadows to see that you’ve been touched by them, and so has he. If you let them they will suck the life out of you as effectively as any dime store vampire... but they can be beaten... I’ve seen it done, but it’s not easy. However, if you believe in what you’re fighting for, then it’s worth the risk."

Skinner had been silent for a while, now he spoke up, "Mark does know what he’s talking about." Seeing the look that Mulder tossed him, he held up his hands and offered, "It really is need to know Mulder, but the advice he’s giving you is sound, so why don’t you let Mark and Krycek continue with the statement taking. Meanwhile you contact your Lone Gunmen and see if they can help us?"

"Sounds like a plan," Krycek said, standing up and moving towards the door, "I’ll see you in a little while Mulder?" It was as much a question as anything else, and he waited hand resting on the door until Mulder looked up, smiled and nodded in agreement saying.

"Are you sure, you’re all right about this Alex? Mulder asked, indicating that he would be leaving his lover in the underground basement alone, after he had promised not to.

Krycek looked at him and smiled, it was warm and full of understanding, as he offered, "This is for us... so I’ll be fine."

"All right, but I’ll only be upstairs making some arrangements, as soon as you’re finished let me know, and Krycek." He paused, making sure that he had Alex’s full attention. "I’m going with you to see Judge Pringle."

Krycek looked slightly relieved and offered, "I wouldn’t have it any other way."

=-=-=-=-=

Krycek looked up from the table where he sat half-heartedly eating a sandwich that Mark had prepared. He had no appetite and had told Agent Beasent this when asked if he wanted a sandwich, but the other man had insisted that he eat something before his meeting with Judge Pringle.

Alex had not seen Mulder since their meeting that morning, but he knew that the other would be doing his best to secure their future. He slumped down further in the seat, ‘their future’, the words seem so ordinary for such an imported event. Did they really have a future, or were they just fooling themselves?

"You know, you have to at least put it to your mouth before it disappears, staring at it won’t do it." Mark Beasent said, leaning back against the kitchen counter, watching the man in front of him.

"I’m not really hungry." Krycek replied, tossing the uneaten food back onto the plate. "I hate this waiting about," he continued, pushing the cool cup of coffee away from him as well.

"I know, it’s the worst part of the job," Mark commented, moving to sit in front of the other man.

Krycek looked up at him and after a few seconds asked, "So, who exactly DO you work for?" Alex had spent the reminder of the morning with this man, dictating his statement. The questions that Mark had asked had been leading and well thought out, allowing Krycek to concentrate on his statement, and not on the excessive information that would just cloud the issues that he wanted to get down on tape.

Mark looked up, then back down at his coffee cup, contemplating the question, finally he asked, "Who exactly do YOU work for Alex Krycek."

Alex let out a snort of laugher, but it didn’t reach his eyes as he said softly, "I just spent the last two days telling you."

Mark smiled, his did reach his eyes, but the cold blue didn’t warm for long, "No... you just spent the last two days telling us what you wanted us to know."

"Word games." Krycek retorted leaning back in his chair, this was a game he understood. "That’s what you like to play."

"No." Mark said, his tone showing his sudden annoyance, "It’s what you like to play, and Alex... you don’t mind if I call you Alex?" He waited until he got a nod of accent. "You are one of the best."

Krycek sighed, he didn’t really want to get into this just now, but the temptation was too great as he offered, "When I am with Mulder I am exactly what I seem."

Mark let out a bark of laughter at that and nodding he agreed. "Oh that I can tell, but you like the shadows Krycek, that’s why you’re so good at it, but Mulder, he is not a shadow kinda of guy, and his light doesn’t allow you to hide does it." It wasn’t a question, so Krycek didn’t bother to treat it as one, as he looked down at the clean table top, giving the appearance of only a token interest in the conversation, when in fact his whole body was tuned to the words. "You really do love him." Again it was a statement, but this time the tone was slightly tainted with the awe of disbelief.

Krycek wished that he’d kept the cup within grasping reach, as he really wanted to hold something between his hands, as he answered his voice firm with his conviction. "Mulder is the best thing that’s ever happened to me... ever." He glanced up, met and held Beasent’s look, "I don’t want to hide in the shadows when he’s with me, nor do I want to drag him into the cesspit of my life."

Mark broke the look, unsettled by the fear he suddenly saw in the depths of the other man’s eyes. Swallowing hard he offered, "Mulder doesn’t look like he’s being dragged er... kicking and screaming into your life Alex... don’t push him away just because you can’t accept the responsibility of his love for you."

"Oh god, you do philosophy as well as supplying FBI AD’s with safe houses, and waste two days taking statements... you are a man of many parts." The sarcasm almost dripped from the mouth of the handsome young man, as his dark eyes scanned the man before him.

Mark smiled and took the last swallow of his coffee before he answered, "Gee man you caught me, what was it, the way I spoke, moved... did you see my philosophy books when I bent over?" Beasent’s smile was frozen on his lips and he was not sure why he was angry.

This time Krycek let out a burst of real laughter as he answered, pushing away and up from the table. "You have my word, yours is a butt that I have not been looking at."

Mark followed suit and rose as well. The statement that Krycek had given should have been transcribed by now. "I’ll get the typing and meet you back in the interrogation room." He glanced at his watch before he continued, "You should have time to give it the once over before you go to see Judge Pringle. How long did Mulder say he was going to be gone?" Mark finished as they headed out the door. The handsome FBI agent had entered the interrogation room earlier that day and taking a second copy of the tapes, saying that he needed them to give to the Lone Gunman, and that a plan had been formulated. He had also bent down and gently brushed his lips against Krycek’s before rising and daring Beasent to say anything. The other man had just shrugged, paused the tape, rewound slightly and then pushed stop button before saying, "I’ll get some coffee."

Krycek smiled as he remembered the kiss, "He said he’d be back before I had to go see Judge Pringle." He paused and bit his bottom lip before asking, "Do you know if he took someone with him."

"I saw Scully upstairs earlier, and Walter was sticking pretty close, I don’t think he’d let anything happen to either of those two, if he cold help it."

Krycek didn’t bother to answer, he turned and headed towards the room where Beasent had told him to wait. He could not let the other man know how much his words had disturbed him, as he had often wondered at Skinner’s true attraction to Mulder. He knew that the man was first and foremost a professional and would never abuse his position by putting the moves one of his subordinates, but still Skinner had been there when he had not.

The door opened and he glanced up expecting to see Beasent, but his face broke into a wide welcoming smile when he saw Mulder slip into the room. The man looked good, really handsome, his face glowing, eyes sparkling. He moved towards his lover and pulled him into a tight embrace, it only lasted a few seconds, but it was enough to make everything right in Krycek’s world once more. As they parted he asked, "How did it go."

"No problem." Mulder said, pulling away to remove his long coat. "The guys were just great. Frohike almost tripped over his tongue when he saw that I had Scully with me, but as soon as he saw the tape, and heard what was on it, he stopped asking her for her phone number and actually paid attention to me.... Which is a first when she’s in the room."

Krycek smiled, Mulder’s mood was catching. "So how did it go?" he still had a greater worry that lurked at the back of his mind, as he asked the question again. When there was still no answer, he rephrased it slightly, "Fox, were they able to help us?" aiming a slight punch at his lover who was still grinning at him.

Mulder saw the flash of anxiety in Krycek’s eyes and hastened to reassure him, "No problem, when I left they were making digital copies of the tapes and Langley was writing a really hot net... web... something programme that would distribute the information world wide if anything happens to us."

Krycek frowned, not sure he truly believed that the lone gunmen could really ensure both his and Mulder’s continued survival. "How exactly are they going to work it?" he asked, moving away from Mulder. He began to bite his bottom lip again, the fear that he was dragging Mulder down with him curled at his stomach again.

Mulder seemed to sense what Krycek was thinking and he moved swiftly to pull the other man back into his embrace. "We’ve made it a two fold system, once a week we both have to log in to an internet chat room and give a password. We will each have a different word, which we will pick up from an international paper, you know New York Times, Arts page, second paragraph, forth word etc, although we will be using a different paper for each of us. If that password isn’t given in time, then the information is released to the world press. Also, if any newspaper reports our death, either via an article or an obituary it will release the information."

"Can they do that... I mean a computer doesn’t read a newspaper, so how will it know what is on the er... Arts page?" Krycek asked, still not relaxing, even while resting in Mulder’s arms.

Mulder pulled a face and stepped back slightly saying, "Some of the chat rooms on the internet are visited by thousands of people from all over the world... Some of them will be charged with seeing our message and passing it along... anyway... it’s slightly technical, but the Lone Gunman are sure that it’s fail-safe, and I’m prepared to trust them, I mean what they don’t know about computers has not been written yet." He smiled, trying to push his good humour upon the other man. He didn’t want to let Krycek know that he also had had his own doubts at first, but each of his three friends had reassured him, and the more involved he got into their reasoning and their planning the better he could see the plan working. "Of course." he added, "It will mean that we will never to able to take that two week holiday on that deserted island that we’ve always wanted."

Krycek smiled and leant into Mulder’s arms. Seeking the comfort again. "Well, if you think it will work, then I guess it’s got to be pretty good."

Mulder nodded agreeing, "There are fail-safes built into it, and at least forty people are involved, most of them are not even known to us." He paused and let out a gusty sigh as he recalled the way his three friends had gotten behind his vague idea and turned it swiftly into a reality. "So if anything should happen to us... well er... not happen to us, but we just can’t get to a phone for some reason," He stopped, before he added, "Look it is complicated, and once it’s all set up, I will take you along to meet them and they can explain it to you more fully, and answer any questions that you have."

Krycek nodded, he knew that he wanted all the answers now, wanted to know that Mulder was safe, that no harm would befall him because of his association with him. Slowly he disengaged himself and smiled warmly. Leaning forward he planted a light kiss on the lips before him, Mulder moved forward into the kiss, when Krycek stepped back, unwilling to lose the contact, but Alex held up a hand, pushing slightly against the other man’s chest as he said, "If Skinner was to catch you... I mean you are lead agent..." He glanced at the door, then back at Mulder.

Mulder, seeing the concern in Krycek’s eyes, sighed and stepped back, he knew that Alex was only thinking of him, but he was not sure he agreed with it. He was just about to open his mouth and protest when the door burst open and Skinner stormed into the room, he looked harassed and frowned hard when he saw how close the other two men were standing, but he pushed his annoyance aside as he snapped.

"Judge Pringle has moved up the appointment, she wants to see you in her office in," he glanced at his watch, "In twenty minutes."

"Twenty minutes..." Mulder began, but his words were cut off by an angry look from his boss.

"Mulder there isn’t time for this," Skinner insisted, as he moved forward and rested a hand upon Krycek’s arm, the smaller man winced and moved slightly away. Skinner let his hand full, but indicated the hallway, "Now please gentlemen."

After exchanging a quick look, the other two men moved from the room. As they left the downstairs apartment, Mark stopped them saying, "The statement will be waiting for you at the new safe house Alex."

"New safe house?" Krycek questions shooting the taller man a hard look.

"It’ll be safer for you, and Mulder." Skinner added, knowing that those words would quieten any complaint from the other man. "Once you leave this place you’ll be an open target."

Krycek felt his breath catch at the AD’s words, then he nodded his agreement. "Alright, but I’m only going to do this once... so the damn Judge had better have her questions written down."

=-=-=-=-=

The trip to the courthouse passed without incident, although both Mulder and Krycek felt as if they had gun sights pointed at them for most of the journey. Trying to distract himself from his own concerns, Krycek asked, "Where’s Scully."

Mulder looked back from his scenery watching and after throwing Skinner a quick glance, the AD was sitting in the front of the car. "She’s going to met us at the court house." Skinner said, not bothering to turn around.

"This er... Judge Pringle... do you trust her?" Krycek continued, unable to stop biting his bottom lip. He could not push away the feeling of uneasiness that was pressing down upon him.

"She has always been an ally in our fight." Skinner said, his tone as cryptic as his words.

Krycek swallowed. Now he definitely felt like a sheep being lead to a slaughterhouse. Mulder, as if sensing his uneasiness, reached across and gently touched a hand. "Don’t worry, I’ll be with you the whole time."

Alex felt his throat suddenly block, and swallowing even harder he forced the words out, "Maybe..." he cleared his throat. "I mean, it might be better if you’re not with me Fox." He spoke the words in a rush, looking out the windows, so as not to look his lovers as he said the words, knowing that he would see only betrayal in the other’s expression. He was well aware that Judge Pringle would be asking him questions, pointed questions that he would have to answer, and Mulder might not like those answers, and their relationship was too new, to unsteady to withstand another blow.

Silence ruled for several long tense moments until Mulder asked, his own voice barely above a whisper. "Why?"

Krycek closed his own eyes, wondering suddenly why his shoulder wound hurt so much, over the last few days he’d almost managed to forget about it, but now, now he could feel it throbbing under his shirt and jacket. He spent a few moments collecting his thoughts before he spoke, "I just think that it might be better for you not to be with me... that’s all, I mean... it could be er.. painful."

Mulder understood why Krycek didn’t want him to accompany him to see the Judge, but Alex had to understand that nothing that he said could ever make him not love him. He had also come to realise that there was more to his father’s involvement with the Consortium than Krycek had lead him to believe. He pushed his sudden anger away and replied firmly. "Together Alex, just like we said... if we break it now, then what’s to stop them from breaking it in the future."

"Mulder it’s not that simple and you know it," snapped Alex, not pleased to see that he was correct about the expression of betrayal. "Damn it Mulder, someone tried to kill you, and you can be sure that I am the number one target on several people’s hit list... it’s just too dangerous, and," he paused before he said firmly, "It’s not necessary."

Now Mulder was angry, it showed in the face that he turned towards his lover, and Krycek could feel it radiating from across the car. The distance between them had never felt to be so great. "We are both going to see Judge Pringle... it is not open for debate."

The words were harsh and cold, and Krycek felt like he wanted to sink further into the seat. Instead he settled for just looking out the window at the passing scenery. When he dredged up enough courage to glance over at his angry lover, he saw that Mulder was steadfastly refusing to acknowledge his look. Closing his eyes against the sudden pain he felt, he realised that this relationship was failing, just like every other he’d ever attempted. He was only trying to protect Mulder from both physical danger and from the knowledge that Krycek had in his head concerning his lover’s father, but to the other man, it was as if Alex was trying to push him away. Krycek spent the next part of the journey, chewing his fingernail until it bled and wondering why he was such a fool to even consider that it would work between Mulder and himself.

After several long minute of silence, a hand sneaked across the back seat, and touched Krycek’s leg. When he glanced over at his lover, he saw a silent apology in his eyes, then looking down once more at the hand, it motioned for his. Suppressing a smile, he carefully reached his own hand down, felt it grasped and held tightly. Glancing back up at Mulder he saw a smile resting upon the other man’s face as he turned his attention back to the passing scenery, but the thumb of the hand holding his slowly stroked in small circles. Krycek felt a smile break across his own features, and he suddenly felt he’d been foolish to believe that their love would fail. Just one look at the clasped hands told him that. He settled back himself, feeling very warm and loved. He no longer needed, nor had the desire, to bite his fingernail.

All to soon the journey ended. The car pulled up in front of the courthouse and they got out. Skinner and Mulder moved to flank Krycek, with the driver moving in behind them. Krycek paused on the steps when he noted a large crowd of people near the top, they were rushing up to greet whoever had just left the building. The press people were pushing and shoving as they scrambled to get closer to the tall man who was waving his hands in the air and declaring that justice had been done.

"Let’s go this way," Skinner advised, seeing the crowd of news reporters and their cameras, moving his group off to the side of the building.

They felt the heat of the day fade suddenly as they entered the courthouse, via a side door. The noise of the city faded as the door quietly shut behind them, reminding Krycek of a large church he had once visited, the high ceilings and towering pillars with the enormous staircase, just added to this appearance.

"Judge Pringle should be waiting in her chambers," Skinner said quietly, as if unwilling to disturb the quietness of the place. Moving forward he showed his ID to the security officers on duty and waved the other pass, guiding them towards the staircase.

As they began to ascend Krycek glanced up and stopped dead, his heart nearly jumping from his chest as he spotted the Cancerman standing near the top. He began to move to place himself in front of Mulder, his actions startling the others, and Skinner thinking that that Krycek was starting to bolt reached out and grabbed him. Mulder, glancing up in surprise, spotted the man that Krycek had seen and felt the blood drain from his features.

The Cancerman, slowly withdrew the smoking cigarette, and let the smoke drift about him. Seeing that he had achieved the effect he wanted he dropped the smoking stick and crushed it under his foot, before he slowly began to descend, heading directly towards the stunned men.

Skinner felt his own stomach twist when he saw the reason for Krycek’s sudden movement, he glanced about to see if they were under any form of attack, but the rest of the court house seem to be continuing with it’s daily routine.

"Alex, my dear boy...." The hated man purred as he neared his prey. "It’s good to see you looking so... healthy."

Krycek knew that his face was as pale as a vampire’s who’d been without blood for several days, but he was not going to let the bastard standing in front of him gain any more advantages. "You know," he spoke his voice a lot firmer then his stomach, "This is a no smoking area, it would be a scream if those security men tossed you out on your ear." He threw a look at the men in question, but they did not appear to have noticed anything strange on the stairway, but Krycek was satisfied, he’d drawn the smoking man’s attention to them.

The forced smile plastered across the man’s face faltered slightly before he retorted, "So hostile Alex? But why, we had such a good relationship going.... before." The words were husky and they conveyed an edge of loss.

"Yeah, that’s why you tried to have me blown up, and left me to die in that silo," Krycek snarled, his temper flaring and lighting the flame of danger in his eyes.

The Cancerman must have heeded their warning, because he backed off slightly from his territorial stance, and waved the other’s words aside. "I knew that you would survive... because that’s what you do Alex, you survive... against the odds... it’s what makes you so," he threw a glance at the other man, gauging just how far he could push the subject. Lips twisting he finished, "Desirable to me." He then turned his attention to Mulder who was standing slightly behind Alex, his expression one of shock as well, at the encounter. "Agent Mulder, I heard about your little problem at the warehouse... please be assured that it has been dealt with, and you have nothing further to fear from that quarter."

Before Mulder could answer Skinner butted in demanding, "What the hell are you doing here?" As he spoke moved forward, trying to take control of the situation. He could see that Scully was poised at the top of the steps, she had just come into view no doubt looking for them. Walter could tell that she has judged the situation and was waiting for his lead. She was a good woman.

"Why... Assistant Director Skinner... I’m here to see that justice is done." Shot back the other man, only giving the AD the briefest of glances as he returned his attention to the handsome man in front of him, and the other who stood slightly shielded by him. "And if Mr Krycek continues up these stairs, then I can guarantee that his victory will be very short lived, for both himself..." He paused and looked steadily at Mulder before continued, "And those he professes... to er.. love... as my influence will only stretch so far."

"You’re standing in our way." Mulder said firmly, meeting the look head on, feeling his own blood begin to boil, he could feel his lovers body trembling slightly as Alex stood firmly in front of him. He also had to admit to feeling the curling snake of jealousy at the look that the older man, his nemesis, was giving his young lover.

"And it would be so easy for me to move aside." Cancerman continued, not missing a beat. "Then if Mr Krycek makes the right decision he would not need to live in fear of his life, and those he is close to... why he might even gain his old life back... is that not what you want...Agent Krycek?"

"And you being such an upstanding citizen, is obviously someone I should trust." Snarled Krycek unable to stand the tension any longer. This man was offering him the thing that he wanted most above all else. The chance to resume his life as an FBI agent, to be able to work at Mulder’s side without fear of being murdered, or chased, hunted for the rest of his natural life. It was another form of torment.

"Trust is a two way street Alex," Cancerman snapped, his own temper finally beginning to show. "What you are about to do, will destroy what ever chance you have of a normal life, and for what?" he demanded, "Do you honestly believe that whatever you say to Judge Pringle will ever reach the public forum? You’re not a fool Alex, you know that this piece of dirty laundry will never be cleaned before an audience."

"No?" Alex snarled, turning slightly he motioned to the crowd of reporters and cameramen, still gathered outside the main doors. "Why don’t we go out there and see." As he spoke he made as if to do just that.

"You would die before you reached the bottom of these steps," hissed the Smoker, glancing about, as if checking on his people.

"Some things are worth dying for... don’t you think?" Krycek shot back, he would have moved further, but Mulder’s hand upon his arm stilled him. He looked into his lover’s eyes, and saw only pride reflected in them, pride and love. The intensity of the moment caught up with him, and he felt the world tilt, but Mulder as if sensing this tightened his grip on his arm, preventing him from falling.

"If you knew that we were coming here today, then you must also know that we already have Alex’s statements... and they are being stored in such a away that if either of us, or our friends, come to any harm, they would be released to the world-wide press. I honestly don’t believe that you have enough pull to prevent them being aired in a public forum." Mulder moved slightly, so that he was standing very close to his lover’s side. If a bullet took out Krycek, it would only have to be a good angle to allow the force of it to take his life as well, that was how close they stood, each man’s stance defying the man who stood in front of them.

The enemy in front of them paused momentarily, a slight flicker of confusion and shock passing across his face as he witnessed the closeness between the two men. He knew that to kill one would mean to murder the other. He withdrew slightly, as he suddenly perceived their closeness. "I can see that we have underestimated the situation...." He paused slightly, considering his options before he nodded congenially, as if parting from friends, "Mr Krycek, your FBI credentials will be waiting for you when you return to the Washington office. You will be expected to resume your position within that organisation, but on the understanding that you will not use any of the information that you have gained during your period of undercover work for us. To do so would be to break national security... and you will then be punished to the full extent of the law." He stopped, slightly amused by the expression of total shock that covered the faces of the three men in front of him. "Do you understand what I am saying Agent Krycek?"

Krycek looked like he was about to pass out. Whatever colour he had gained back during his verbal battle, had drained away again with the other’s words and it was only the continued support of his lover’s nearby body that prevent him from swooning upon the steps. Licking at suddenly too dry lips he gasped, "I... I... don’t... unde..." He slowly shook his head, swallowing convulsively, looking at the man in front of him, as if he were a snake about to strike.

The Smoker frowned and demanded, "Do you understand what I am saying Agent Krycek?"

Mulder, his face tight with emotion and feeling the trembling in his lover grow to an obvious shaking, reached an arm about him, worried that the other man was about to collapse. It seemed as if the strain of the past few months was catching up with him all at once, even as his lover realised that he was being offered what he desired most. It would be a cruel trick to play if it were then snatched away. When the pause became noticeable Mulder jumped into the breach, "How do we know that you will honour your words."

The old man felt his shoulders slump slightly in defeat as he offered dryly, "You already have his statements, and I know that you will keep you word about publishing them across the globe, I don’t think that at the present time we can afford for that to happen."

"So that’s it... after all that you’ve done, attempted to do, we should just turn our backs and walk away..." Mulder questioned angrily, his voice barely above a whisper as his hatred of the man before him temporarily ruled his emotions. "Let you walk away..."

Their antagonist suddenly looked annoyed as he shot back, "I do wish that you would get your priorities sorted Agent Mulder, one moment you are bargaining for Krycek’s life, the next you are demanding justice... to get one you must forfeit the other... so what is it to be?" Even before he had finished, the smoking man could see the answer in the other’s eyes and he wondered at the depth of love that Mulder must feel for the man who now appeared to be slumped within his embrace. He felt a flash of envy for them, because he knew that he could never love another person as deeply as Mulder loved Krycek. With a gentleness that surprised him as much as the men listening he offered, "Take what you have Mulder and guard it very closely... it’s worth so much more then any truth you can ever hope to discover... and it’s a damn sight warmer." With those words he spun to one side and continued down the steps. To anyone watching, the entire event would have looked like an interesting, but intense discussion, where one of the men appeared to suddenly fall ill.

Several tense seconds passed, before one of the courthouse staff cautiously approached and asked "Is he all right?" She motioned to Krycek who was still leaning heavily into Mulder’s arms for support. Skinner as if coming out of his own trance, moved swiftly to the other side of Krycek and offered his own support saying.

"He’s just had a bit of a shock... is there somewhere quiet where we could rest up for a few minutes?" He asked, giving the woman one of his best smiles.

This caused the woman to become a bit flustered, but eventually she directed them to a side room saying, "We do have a first aid personnel on site if you require assistance."

"That won’t be necessary.... He will be fine in a few moments," Skinner insisted as he helped Mulder half carry Krycek to the room that had been pointed out to them. Scully joined them as they reached the top of the stairs, her face plainly showing that there were many questions she would like to ask. Once inside the quiet room they sat Krycek down on a large comfortable chair, and Mulder crouched in front of him, calling his name urgently.

Skinner moved to a small sink in the corner and fetched a cup of cold water that he held out to Mulder saying, "I’ll leave Paterson, on the door...." Quickly glancing at his watch he went on, "I’d better get up to Judge Pringle’s chambers and explain the delay."

Mulder’s attention was fully fixed upon his lover, until he heard the Judge’s name mentioned, then he glanced up and asked, "Can we trust her?" He was referring to the fact that Cancerman had been waiting for them on the steps.

"I don’t know," Skinner answered honestly, "But, for the moment, I think we need to retreat, regroup and consider what we’ve just learnt before we go any further... don’t you?"

"I think I’m going to be sick," Krycek suddenly stated, rousing himself enough to push Mulder roughly aside and stumble over to the sink, where he slumped over and began to heave.

Skinner, seeing this grimaced and glancing away, suggested, "You’d better see to him, once I’m finished I’ll come back, then we can decide what to do."

Mulder barely acknowledged the other man as Skinner left with Scully in tow, his entire attention was fixed on his lover.

After Krycek had finished, he stood swaying over the sink for a few moments, before he turned on the tap and splashed cold water onto his face, then he took a deep mouthful, swishing it about his mouth before he spat it out into the sink. "God, I am such a wimp," he said, his voice still shaking. "Some great double agent I make, nearly passing out on the steps, and now throwing up like a frightened school kid." The bitterness could clearly be heard in his tone, and it tore at Mulder as he moved toward Alex and pulled him into a tender embrace. Krycek resisted for a few, tense, seconds before he slumped into the welcoming arms and allowed his head to rest on Mulder’s shoulder.

Gently Mulder rubbed his hand up and down the shaking back. "I think you have every reason to react the way you did Alex," Mulder confided, his voice as gentle as his caress. "In the last few months, you been nearly blown up; shot at; possessed by an alien; left to die in a silo; and then shot trying to defend me.... Finally, just when you think it’s about to end, that smoking bastard appears once more and pulls the rug from under our feet.... So I think you’ve got good reason to lose it for a while." He planted a kiss on the curve of the neck that was resting just under his chin, before finishing, "Hell, I’d have been a jelly on those steps long before you were, if it had happened to me."

Krycek pulled back slightly, looking into Mulder’s face he smiled somewhat shakily and offered, "Well seeing as how you put it like that...."

"Let’s sit back down again," Mulder suggested, steering the man over to the sofa that was situated along the other wall.

"Do you think he meant it?" Krycek suddenly asked, once he was settled, reaching out to grasp Mulder’s hand as the other man sat beside him.

"What?" Mulder began then saw the other’s expression he concluded, "About your reinstatement?" He paused, then added, "Why not... least that way he and his little band can keep an eye on you, and he knows that we will each act as hostage for the other."

"Hostage?" Alex asked, giving Mulder a long sidelong look.

Mulder sat back and let his head fall to rest on the back of the sofa, closing his eyes he let his own reaction wash over him, he felt drained and exhausted, so he could only imagine just how back Krycek felt. "He knows that whatever else I might be prepared to do, I won’t endanger your life...." He glanced over and gave Alex a warm smile, it was genuine and reached his eyes, lingering for a short time as he continued, "Oh, he knows that I won’t stop searching for the truth, but he also knows that he’s got an ace up his sleeve if ever the time comes that I actually understand what the truth is that I’m searching for."

"I won’t allow..." Krycek began, not liking the idea that he was going to be used as a method of blackmail against his lover. But Mulder shushed him before he could finish, saying.

"You don’t have a choice Alex... I’m not letting you go, I’ve lost too many people that I care about, and I am not going to lose you as well... I can’t.." he stopped suddenly overwhelmed by the reality of what he was feeling. "I can’t survive that... so it’s not an option."

Krycek opened his mouth, wanting to deny the other’s words, wanting to find an argument against what Mulder was saying, but he closed it slowly when he realised that the words Mulder had spoken were the truth, and that he also felt the same. So, instead of arguing, he said, "I feel as if this is some weird dream and I’m going to wake up in that warehouse bleeding all over you."

The hand holding his squeezed it very tightly, then Mulder reached over with the other hand and pinched the back of Krycek’s hand, making the other man yelp.

Mulder grinned, "This isn’t a dream Alex." Leaning over he gently rested his lips against the warm mouth of his lover, slowly, hesitatingly, Krycek’s lips opened under his, and he slipped his tongue deep inside, it started out as a necessary form of reassurance, but soon their desire overtook them and Mulder groaned as Krycek twisted slightly so that he was half resting over his body.

Finally parting for air, Mulder shot a look over his lover’s shoulder at the open doorway and said, his tone hushed from lack of breath, "We are in a courthouse, with god knows how many people out there Alex." He inhaled sharply as Krycek wiggled slightly, nudging Mulder’s growing erection as he did so, "I really think we should shelve this for later," he finally gasped out, fearing Skinner’s return at any moment.

Krycek, seeing the sense behind Mulder’s words, slid back on the sofa, disappointment clearly showing on his handsome features. Mulder noted with deep satisfaction that much of the colour had returned to Alex’s face.

Suddenly Alex’s face crumbled and he sagged against the sofa as a devastating thought struck him. Mulder feeling the body language demanded to know what was the matter. Krycek seemed unable to met his concerned look as he mumbled, "If I’ve been reinstated to the FBI, then I guess beating my boss up in that hospital stairwell wasn’t such a good idea."

At first Mulder could just look at Krycek in shock, until he saw the slight curve of the lips and knew that his lover was teasing him. Raising an eyebrow he plastered a concerned look across his own face as he agreed, "I never thought of that, do you think he’ll take it out on your lover?" To emphasise his words he withdrew slightly from the body that nestled closely beside him. A few moments of totally stunned, shock silence followed from the man sitting next to him before Mulder forgave him and settling back next to his lover he finished, "But if I know Skinner, then he’ll have you on transcribing surveillance tapes for the next six months." He shivered dramatically as he remembered his stint at that particular job.

The look this earned him would have fried him on the spot if he’d been made of weaker stuff, instead it just cause a rush of blood from his mind to his lower body, and he licked at suddenly dry lips, "I hope Skinner hurries up." He added, seeing the flame of desire flicker from his own body to his lover’s eyes.

As if on cue the man in question appeared at the door, "Are you ready?" he asked, eyeing Krycek, who clambered weakly to his feet, and moved towards the door to met the other man.

"What happened with Judge Pringle?" Mulder asked, allowing Skinner to precede them out of the room.

Skinner snorted in disgust, "Judge Pringle got called in to cover another trial on short notice when another Judge took sick.... She still in session, but she left a message for me to contact her later tonight."

"So what do we do now?" Krycek asked. They were now descending the stairs where a short time earlier he had faced his deadly nemesis. He was still slightly shaky, but with Mulder close, offering his support at his side, he felt able to ask about the future.

Skinner paused, considering the question, before he answered, "I guess I return to the office and see if Cancerman was telling the truth when he spoke about your credential being reinstated."

"What if they were?" Alex asked, his voice barely above a whisper as he contemplated his reinstatement to the FBI. If he had been then it would truly be like a dream come true, he had not lied to Mulder when he said that he had always wanted to be an FBI Agent.

Skinner pulled a face, he did not look as enthused as Krycek was about having the man working under him again. "Then I will expect to see you at the office on Monday morning... after," he added firmly, "You’ve been checked out by a departmental doctor and passed fit for duty."

Whatever else Krycek might have been about to say was lost as they passed out of the main entrance of the court house and into the sun light and noise of the large city.

=-=-=-=-=

Epilogue

Mulder rested his sweating forehead on his lover’s upper stomach. They had just finished having world shattering sex, and he felt like he could just slip of into sleep.

"Mulder." Krycek said, as the weight of his lover became steadily heavier. He nudged at his lover’s side. "Mulder... move... can’t breathe..." His position was difficult as his legs had been draped over Mulder’s shoulders and he was now effectively being bent in half. Not a very comfortable position to fall asleep in, even if he could. Not getting a reply, an evil gleam came to his eyes and he reached down to grab at the fleshy side of his sleeping lover.

Mulder awoke with a yelp of shock and twisted off the body he was laying on. After a few seconds he gathered himself enough to demand. "Why’d you do that for?" He was not angry, just confused. He felt too relaxed after the lovemaking to be angry with Alex.

"You are not a light man Mulder." Krycek said, nodding at his wounded side as he straightened his limbs and stretched his back to ease the last of the kinks out.

Mulder realising what he had done, blushed deeply and snuggling closer to Alex. He kissed the injured shoulder, which was healing well, then trailed little pecks up the neck saying, "I’m sorry, but making love to you just sends me spiralling into exhaustion... you’re that good." he finished, gently raising himself to kiss the side of Alex’s lips, which had turned up in a slight smile at his words.

"I am good aren’t I." Krycek said smugly, as he wriggled a bit, to turn Mulder over on his back, and allowing him to wedge himself under the other man’s arm to sprawl across his chest. This was fast becoming his favourite position, using Mulder as a human pillow.

Mulder was content to let him do so. They were in Mulder’s apartment, Krycek not having anywhere to live, and if Mulder had anything to do with it, it would be a while, if ever, before he got around to looking for his own place.

After their unusual encounter with Cancerman, Skinner had returned to his office to find that what they had been told was indeed true. Krycek had indeed been reinstated as an FBI Agent, his past indiscretions being explained away via a fictitious undercover assignment. To add credence to the assignment it was even suggested that he be awarded a citation for his dedication to duty.

They had spent the last few days sorting out their new life. Krycek was now reinstated into the FBI and was once more reporting to AD Walter Skinner, who had immediately put him on transcribing surveillance tape, an assignment that Mulder had been doing when Krycek had first met him.

"I can’t believe that Skinner would assign me to transcribing those damn tapes." Krycek suddenly said, his body tensing with indignation.

Mulder opened his eyes and look up at the darkened ceiling. Why was it that whenever they made love, he was nearly catatonic afterwards and Krycek was up to discussing the weather or any other titbit that flashing into his sex soaked mind. Suppressing a yawn, Mulder answered, "You’re still not fit for active duty... you heard the doctor... desk duty for the next month," he planted a kiss on the dark hair resting just under his chin.

"I know that, but transcribing surveillance tapes," groused Alex, "That’s like being sent to Siberia for the duration..." then he added remembering their conversation at the Court house, "I thought you were just joking about him doing that."

"Well, if you get to have mind blowing sex like we just had in Siberia, then I want to go there for our next vacation," Mulder said, his tone more of a mumble as he once again began to slip into sleep.

"Do you think he’ll keep his word?" Krycek asked, allowing his hand to slowly trace circles on the body under his.

Mulder’s eyes snapped open once more, he knew exactly who Alex was talking about. "I think so." he said slowly, showing Krycek that he was weighing his words and not just saying what he thought Alex wanted to hear. "And with the system that the Lone Gunman have set up, he has a lot more to lose than we do if he doesn’t." The system that he was referring to concerned the taped statements that Krycek had made and their method of checking in once a fortnight to ensure that the tapes were not released to the press world wide.

"Do you think, our reporting into that web-based chat room will work?" Krycek asked, moving about so that he was resting up on one elbow, which allowed him to look down into his lovers face.

Again Mulder seriously considered the question before he answered, "I think so, the chat room they have chosen has over two hundred visitors at any one time, and no-one will now who or how many of those people are charged with confirming that we were actually on site to validate our continued health." Reaching out to gently push aside a stray lock of his lover’s hair that had fallen across his handsome face, he added. "Once a month we have to check in verbally to the Lone Gunman’s computer network for voice verification, if the caller does not match out voice patterns then alarms go off all over the place, according to Frohike."

"Modern technology at your fingertips." Alex said about a smile as he settled down. Mulder knew that Krycek was not totally happy with the arrangements, and that his lover was still not convinced that it was going to work, but as Mulder had already explained, only time would tell if it was really successful, and the Lone Gunman did know what they were talking about. Mulder also realised that some of Alex’s fear came from fact that he had spent so long on the run that he still woke up night screaming from his dreams. Mulder was disturbed when Krycek explained the one where he would be forcibly held down while his arm was sawn off. A part of Mulder put this down to the fact that Alex still felt as if he had lost apart of himself when the oil alien had left his body. Mulder wondered idly what he chances were of getting his lover to seek help for these dreams, his thoughts were interrupted again as Krycek spoke.

"I don’t think Scully was too happy to see me sitting at your desk earlier today." He had popped down to visit Mulder during his lunch hour, and had been innocently sitting at Fox’s desk, while Mulder made some coffee when Scully had walked in, she had frozen in the doorway for a few seconds before she had entered, "Do we need to get another desk in here Mulder?" She had asked her tone tight as she moved to her own seat.

Mulder had looked up, then back down at the coffee cups before saying, "Not for a while... I think Skinner has found the perfect revenge." Seeing the raised eyebrow this earned him from his working partner he went on, "He’s put Alex on transcribing surveillance tapes, in the general office." All three knew that doing that particular job in the hubbub and noise of the general office only made it that much harder... it would take twice as long to transcribe the tapes. He then held up the coffee-pot, silently asking her if she wanted one, she shook her head and smiled.

"And who said revenge isn’t sweet." She smiled sweetly at Alex, who pulled a face before saying.

"I’m not here to take your place Scully." The words were not spoken loudly, but the way he said them must have satisfied Dana because she nodded once, then said.

"Damn I forgot to pick up the file on the Jamerson case while I was in records." With that she smiled at Mulder, nodded once more to Krycek and headed out of the room again.

"It’s going to take some time..." Mulder said, jarring Alex back to the present and the bed they were both resting in.

"I know... it’s just..." he paused, not sure if he could put his concerns into words.

"Just what?" Mulder asked gently, tightening his arm about his lover, showing that he was trying to understand.

Alex sighed, "I don’t know, maybe this has all happened so fast, fallen into place so swiftly, it’s like... I don’t really believe it true... I keep thinking that this is the dream and that I’m going to wake up in the morning and find myself laying on the cold forest floor with my arm lopped off." The fear in the voice was palpable, and it moved Mulder.

He shifted slightly so that he was able to look his lover directly in the eyes, leaning forward he instigated a warm, loving kiss, it lasted for several moments before he pulled away, saying, "This is not a dream, what you do to me here...." He took Krycek’s hand and gently rested it over his own growing erection, "Is not a dream, it’s real and so are we. Nothing and no one can take that away from us... Now I’m not going to lie here and promise that we are not going to have problems, nor that I am going to be able to stop searching for the truth, I can’t... it’s in my blood." He smiled a bit at his own words, but then became serious as he continued, "But I will promise you, that I will do everything in my power to ensure that we will be together for as long as possible, and that I would do my utmost to protect you, ‘cause you mean more to me than anything else."

Krycek looked as if he wanted to say something, but the words seemed to have eluded him, that was the most impassioned speech that he had heard Mulder make, and it filled him with an even deeper love for the man before him. "I love you." he finally gasped out, moving so that he was once more nestled in the arms of the man he loved, head resting on the chest he adored, as exhaustion overtook him.

Several silent minutes passed before Mulder whispered, "Alex..." no reply, just the deep even breathing of his lover. Mulder licked at his dry lips, his erection resting snugly against the tempting form of the man lying beside him. "Are you asleep?" he asked, desperately hoping that Alex was just pretending, as he was now wide awake and wanting his lover again. "Alex!!!" Mulder gasped in exasperation before he hissed, his tone while warm edged with frustration, "You know you really are a rat bastard Alex Krycek."

A warm hand moved to gentle curl about his erection, causing Mulder to gasp, as Krycek answered, his own lips curved in a smile that rested upon his lover’s broad chest as he began to gently pump the shaft in his grasp building the tension as he spoke, "Yeah, but I’m your rat bastard Fox Mulder."

 

End.


End file.
